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She’s nodding along, a grin on her face growing. I suspect she’s filling in all the blanks herself without me telling her. “And you’re really hitting it off, huh?”
“I guess. He’s funny, he’s clever, he’s handsome. He built that cabin he brought to me himself, and he’s super kind. It’s just that, um...” I feel myself turning red as I talk about him. “I think he’s already in love with me, Grandma.”
“Wait,” she pauses. “You’re saying he’s already in love with you? You’re just guessing that, right?”
“No. He told me. He’s already making grand overtures. Suggesting that I have a place to stay with him if he wants. Joking about going into town and getting a marriage license.”
“Sounds a tad bit obsessive to me,” she sighs. “And this is the guy actually delivering the Golden Dragon to me.”
“He’s sweet and he’s nice, Grandma. I’m getting this is just his nature. It’s not like he’s some obsessed weirdo who doesn’t have other options.”
“I’m sorry, Red, this just sounds a tad ridiculous. Love at first sight, what you’re describing, is something that belongs in fairy tales. It’s just as likely as crystal shoes, edible gingerbread houses, or pigs who know masonry. A thing of children’s stories and nothing more.”
“You’d know what belongs in the storybooks, wouldn’t you, Grandma.” I smile. “But you do write much more depressing novels. Maybe you’re a bit more jaded than you realize. Love at first sight may be a cliche, but there has to be some basis in it right? It can’t be that impossible.”
She lets out a long breath, shaking her head. “It’s more than I don’t believe in it, Red. It’s just that I’ve weathered a lot. I know what it’s like to get my hopes up only for life to snatch it away, shattering my heart into pieces.”
I reflect on what I Know about my grandmother. She’s had a few boyfriends, but they’ve been rare. “You had to be in love at some point, Grandma. I know Jones isn’t your maiden name.”
She nods. “I was married once. Your grandfather. He died when your father was very young.”
I never knew that grandparent. And Grandma never opened up about it. It seemed like a tender issue for her.
“I loved Albert so very dearly. He was my world, my inspiration. He used to write my poetry, little erotic stories, everything. Just for me. We met in college, of course, same major. We inspired one another to keep going, even when things were tough. Then fate snatched him away from me. I was devastated. I’d never known greater depression than I did at that point, and if I didn’t have your father to care for after that tragic accident, I don’t know what I’d have ended up doing.”
“I’m so sorry to hear that, Grandma.”
“I want to make sure you don’t make the same mistakes I do, Red. You need to be very careful in how close you attach yourself to a man, and I can sense that you’re tempted indeed by his sweet words.”
“Do you expect me to never fall in love, then, Grandma? Out of fear of a broken heart?”
“No, I...” She shakes her head, obviously unsure of herself. “ I don’t want you to get hurt.”
“Besides, wasn’t that time with Grandpa worth all the pain? You have such fond memories of him if they’ve stuck with you for all this time. Do you not want me to experience something similar?”
“Red, I...” She’s overwhelmed, a tear in her eye. “I don’t know. I just don’t know.”
“You can’t stop me from falling in love. I’m sure you’ve had this same conversation with Dad.”
She sighs. “He didn’t listen either.”
“Yeah, well, I don’t think we can. It’s not like falling in love is something we control. We call it falling, Grandma. Not controlled descent into love.”
She laughs. It’s so nice to hear after the thoughts of her lost love had made her so dour.
“You can’t protect me from every negative feeling, Grandma. But you can support me. You can be there for me. Nothing’s perfect. Not even Hood, or Grandpa, or whoever we fall in love with.”
“You’re such a bright little girl, Red. I see so much of myself in you. I guess I have to trust you to make the right decisions. And I guess with the way you talk? This Hood isn’t the only one falling in love.”
I blush. I didn’t want to admit it. That’s why I worded it the way I did. It felt foolish, like I should know better, but I can’t escape it.
“I trust you to take control of your own life, Red. Even if I find what you do silly, I’ll live with it. Kind of like that time you dyed your hair black because you thought it was too on the nose that your name is Red when you have red hair.”
“Grandma, I was sixteen. It was a mistake, please.” Stupid goth phase.
She laughs. “Do what you need to do, dear. Even if you gotta be a blonde this time.”
I shake my head smiling, as I step away, heading to my room. I have a date to get dressed for, and I’m not sure how to do it. I didn’t exactly pack a shimmering evening gown. I came up here to tend to my grandmother, not meet hot guys, even if that ended up being the result.
