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“Pizza!” Rush cries loudly.
“Yeah, pizza sounds great,” Cannon says in a deep voice. He barely ever talks, at least to me or in front of me, so I’m startled to hear a complete sentence out of him.
Hollis nods in agreement.
“I’ll order pizza then.” I duck from the room and head for the kitchen. I pull my phone from my pocket to order pizza from a place downtown that makes the best wood-fired pizzas.
I finish ordering and turn around to find Hollis leaning against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest. His shirt rides up a bit, exposing a tiny sliver of tanned smooth stomach. I swallow past the lump in my throat.
Those wicked eyes stare me down. He doesn’t say a word. He doesn’t have to.
He stalks toward me, and I back away like a cornered animal, ending up right where he wants me with my butt pressing into the counter with no means of escaping.
He lowers his head to the crook of my neck and my breath stutters, thinking he’s going to kiss me there. Instead, he whispers a confession against the heat of my skin. “I’m trying so fucking hard to be your friend, Mia—to not be the guy you think I am, that I was—but it’s killing me. I’ve never been the jealous type, but I wanted to rip that guy’s head off for being close to you.”
I don’t know what to say. I can barely breathe.
I’ve always been the cautious type but ever since Hollis stepped out of my bathroom, I’ve felt like I’ve jumped feet first into a pool of water and my feet never found the bottom. Now I’m desperate for air but the surface is too far to reach.
If I could stay away from him, if I hadn’t proposed this whole friends thing, maybe eventually I’d be able to wade through the waters I’ve tumbled into, but it’s impossible. There’s no avoiding Hollis Wilder—and even if I tried to ignore him, I know he’d find me.
“You need to step back,” I say. “If my dad—”
He growls, cursing under his breath but does step away. He shoves his fingers roughly through his brown curls.
We stare at each other, so little distance between us when in reality we’re miles apart.
I can’t deny the way my heart beats around him. I can’t deny some of the thoughts I’ve had. I may not be able to deny them, but I can’t act on them either. This attraction between us is only that—an attraction—and I’m not the kind of girl who does one-night stands. I don’t judge someone who does, but it’s not for me, and I know Hollis will eventually grow bored of me. Then what? Besides, he’s working on an amazing album I feel certain will do extremely well and then they’ll end up going on tour. Touring means temptation at every turn. Heck, I can recall being small and even with the wives and kids traveling with them half-clothed women still threw themselves at my dad and the other members of Willow Creek.
“We can’t be more than friends,” I tell him. “It has to be this way. I’m sorry.”
His jaw works back and forth. “I want to be that guy for you—a good guy. The one who doesn’t push you for more, who’s there for you, but I’m not so sure I can be your friend. I’m trying. I really am, but I can’t stop feeling the way I do either and it’s killing me. It’skillingme, Mia.”
Gone is the cocky guy who strutted out of my bathroom and in his place is a stranger. Someone who’s a mere shadow of the other guy. The vulnerability he displays nearly knocks me unbalanced. I wish the other version of him would come back, disliking him was easier. Hating this new Hollis is impossible.
But if he can’t be strong enough to resist this, then I’ll have to do it for the both of us.
* * *
I spendthe next two weeks avoiding Hollis as much as I can. I still see him at the studio, but I avoid his glances and questioning gazes. I also make sure he can never corner me alone.
In the short time we spent together I really grew to like him, and now with not spending time with him I actually miss him. But I know staying away is for the best. I need to focus on school, he needs to focus on his music, and anything between us would be way too complicated.
I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before he figures out how to get me alone, I can see his irritation growing stronger every day, but eventually he’ll realize I’m protecting the both of us.
Besides, he might think he hasrealfeelings for me, but there’s no way. It’s too fast and with the life he’s lived the last few years … there’s no freaking way wanting a different woman in his bed every night just goes away. I’m sure once his album is complete and he can leave here, he will. He can return to his clubbing, drinking, man-whoring ways.
At least, that’s what I tell myself so I can feel better about avoiding him.
The hurt in his eyes, though? It’s real. I can’t deny it.
I walk into the studio, precariously balancing the coffee I picked up as well as the subs I brought along from the Sub Club. I don’t normally work there and then come to the studio, but my dad said they’d be working late and he wanted the extra help.
“Whoa, careful there.” Cannon who’s lounging in the front room hops up from the couch he was sprawled on, setting his book aside, to help me carry the load in.
He takes the cup holder from me and his big hands nearly dwarf it.
“Thanks.” I flash him a smile.
