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Things have been a little easier since she came to my office, but I’m not sure we’ll ever be the same. I’m very rarely moody, but I know I’ve not been myself since it happened. I’ve been off my food and feeling low, which is very unusual for me. Mack told me I’m lovesick, and even though I told him to fuck off, privately I conceded he was right. I miss her, and I’m angry and frustrated—not with her necessarily, but with the world, with Fate, and with myself.
I have great belief in my ability to talk other people into doing what I want. It’s a talent I developed at a young age, and it’s very rare that I fail. So I feel as if the rug has been whipped out from under my feet. It’s shaken me, and even though my feelings toward her haven’t changed, I find it difficult to be around her. I want to try and convince her to stay with me, to force her to listen, to browbeat her into submission. But I can’t do that. I’ve got to let her go, and it’s turning out to be the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.
In a way it’s a good thing that I haven’t seen much of her at all over the past few weeks. She’s been busy working on the IVF project with Titus and Mack, and the only time I’ve seen her is at our usual Friday meetings, when she’s been the last to arrive and the first to leave. But at the wedding we’re going to be in close proximity, and that’s going to be a challenge.
The guests have been requested to arrive by one p.m. with the hope of being ready to sail at two. I catch an Uber and get there at twelve, hoping I can help Mack with any last-minute organization. He’s already there when I arrive, and tells me that Sidnie is picking up her folks and will be there shortly.
“Come and look around the yacht,” he says. “It’s fucking amazing.”
I have to admit, it’s a great location to tie the knot, and maybe the most sumptuous place I’ve ever stayed. It has twenty-eight passenger cabins, all of which will be filled tomorrow night when we pick up his family in the Bay of Islands, and over a hundred crew. It has a helipad on the bow, a swimming pool, spacious viewing decks, a dining saloon, a licensed bar, and an observation lounge. The free-flowing layout encourages indoor-outdoor living, with curved sofas and chairs both inside and on the deck, lots of cushions, glass tables, and plenty of lamps for when the sun sets. The whole place is decorated in creams, light blues, oak, and mother of pearl.
“Snazzy, isn’t it?” Mack comments as we make our way back.
“It’s fantastic.”
We lean on the railing on the upper deck and look down at the gangway, where the crew are carrying supplies onto the yacht.
“It’s a shame Joanna couldn’t come,” Mack says. “There are going to be other kids here. She’d have loved it.”
“Yeah, she’s sorry she’s missing it, but Brandy’s parents insisted she be present for their big do.” It’s Brandy’s parents’ fortieth wedding anniversary, and they’re having a huge party where they live in Wellington. “I could have argued with them, but I wanted to be able to concentrate on my best man duties.”
Mack grins. “Fair enough.”
“Brandy’s taking Billy down to meet them,” I tell him.
His eyebrows rise. “Oh, that’s a big step for her. Do you think they’ll like him?”
“I think they’ll adore him.”
“What do you think of him?”
“He’s solid and dependable, just what she needs. I’m pleased for her. And he gets on well with Joanna.”
Mack glances across at me. “You okay with that?”
“Of course,” I say, surprised. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
Mack studies me for a moment. He hesitates. Then he says, “You should tell her, you know.”
“Tell who what?”
“Elizabeth.”
“What about her?”
“You should tell her the truth,” he says. “About Brandy.”
I look at his odd, planetary eyes. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“I think you do.”
There’s a long pause. My heart’s racing. He’s never spoken to me about this before.
“You fucking idiot,” he says, with some affection. “What am I going to do with you?”
My throat tightening, I look down at the dock and watch a group of people getting out of a taxi. “Your blushing bride’s here,” I say. “We’d better go down.”
“Yeah, come on.” He claps me on the back, and we descend the steps to where Sidnie and her family are walking up the gangway.
