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“And how’s that? How are we going to stop someone who has every means possible? If Kemp is dead, she’ll chase me out of spite. I can’t—”
“Do you want to leave San Francisco?” he asks. “I know a guy up north who can get us into a place in Alaska. It’s not going to be fancy, but there’s a really small chance that anyone could find us there.”
I stare back at him unsure of how to answer. There’s really nothing for me in California, except my mother who wouldn’t notice if I disappeared off the face of the planet, but still, she’s all I’ve had for as long as I’ve been alive. I can’t just leave.
“My mother. I have to at least say something to her. I can’t just—”
“So we’ll stop in San Francisco for the night. We’ll just have to head out early. The longer we’re there the more attention we’re going to draw to ourselves. I have a feeling when this hits the news, people are going to want interviews with contestants, especially if this guy and his wife are a big deal.”
“Should we even go back then? I mean, I could call my mom I guess. She’ll probably be too busy for me, anyway.”
Zane runs his hand down my shoulder as the boat hits another hard wave. “You should go see her. It might be a few years before we can get back.”
“Years?” Visions of raising my baby amidst roaming caribou in an off-grid cabin flash into my mind. I never much imagined myself so rugged. I mean, I don’t need Starbucks every day, and I’m not into having my eyelashes glued on, but I do like the general convenience of running water and electricity.
“We don’t have to stay forever,” Zane says. “It will just be until this whole thing blows over.”
I shake my head and grip the edge of the small bed as the boat hits another wave. “I can’t let you do that. You guys can’t give up your lives for me. You’ve got a life in Miami. You’re—”
Zane narrows his eyes. “I think we all agree there is no life without you anymore, princess.”
I gaze up at Zane, his dark eyes gleaming in the dim light of the cabin. His expression is raw and telling, as though he’s genuinely willing to do anything for his family, desperate for me to let him.
“Are you sure? I don’t want you to regret everything in a few months when my stomach is the size of a watermelon and I’m waddling around with cravings for sushi and pineapples. Not to mention all the crying that will surely ensue over things that don’t need to be cried over.”
He runs his hand over top of my stomach and lays a kiss on the tip of my nose. “I’ve been thinking I needed to fatten you up anyway. And the crying… well, I guess that means you’ll need some extra time in my arms.”
I let out the breath I’ve been holding and lean against his hard, hairy chest, listening to his heart as it beats. “What about a doctor? I’ll need someone to deliver the baby. How—”
“A buddy of mine lives off grid in Alaska. He knows of a midwife. It’s not going to be what you’re used to in the city, but a friend of his had a baby there. We can check everything out ahead of time.”
I let a deep breath fill my lungs, then let it out slowly as I think over all my options. Going back to California is a mistake. It doesn’t take long for news to travel; I’d bet by morning Kemp’s wife will already have people out looking for me.
A picture of my mom forces its way into my head. I was three years old, sitting on her lap at a park just west of the city overlooking the buildings. She had a big smile on her face. Not a fake,smile for the cameratype of grin, but a warm, inviting smile. And her gaze wasn’t on the view, it was on me. I kept that picture in a box in my room since I was a girl. I’d pull it out and look at it when I was lonely, reminding myself that the woman that loved me was just as lost as I was. Sadly, she still is.
I look toward Zane. “It doesn’t make sense, but I need to say goodbye to her. We don’t need to stay long, just an hour. I just want to say goodbye.”
Zane nods and holds me tighter. “We’ll keep you safe, princess. I promise you with everything I am… you and that baby will be cared for.” His eyes are intense, and his gaze is pure.
“I never doubted it,” I say, running my fingers through the hair on his chest as I kiss him gently. “And I never will.”
Chapter Eighteen
Sara
My feet bounce in place under the table as I wait for my mother to arrive. It’s been a long trip back to San Francisco between the questioning at the police station in Antigua and traveling back to the city. Not only that, but the past few days have been an emotional whirlwind. I’ve never wanted a quiet Alaskan retreat so badly.
“Odd of you to ask for a lunch date,” a woman’s voice says from behind me. I know it’s my mother right away by the slight rasp that catches her words, a product of her smoking a pack a day for the last twenty years.
“Hey, Mom,” I say, standing from the table to hug her.
She looks at me with an odd glare that unsettles my already queasy stomach. “Something is wrong. What happened? You never ask for lunch, and now your energy is off.”
There’s no denying my energy is off, but I’m not sure how much I should tell her, or even if she’ll care when the words finally do fall out. I’m sure she has to get back to Todd or whatever the new one’s name is soon.
I glance out the picture window to see Zane, Colin, and Brad still waiting for me outside on the wharf. They insisted on being close in case anything happened. I’ve already wished a thousand times they were sitting next to me, but it’s probably best I do this on my own.
“I’m going away for a while, Mom. I just wanted to let you know.”
