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At my silence, she said, “I thought I saw something on social media.”
“It was beautiful there, but not like I always dreamed it would be.”
“What do you mean?” she asked, seeming genuinely interested in my thoughts on the place, not just in what I’d brought home or if I’d met any Frenchmen, like my cheerleading friends had wanted to know. But then again, that made sense. I made sure my squad mates didn’t know the deepest parts of me. Only the parts I thought they would like.
I thought back to Paris, the morning I had walked the city streets on my own while my parents ate at a café. “Everyone calls Paris the most romantic city in the world, but a lot of it was so loud and crowded. And it was more modern than I expected it to be. But there were beautiful parts too. There’s this massive garden that surrounds the Eiffel Tower, and people brought blankets and little bottles of wine, just passing the time.”
“It sounds amazing.” There were stars in her eyes.
“Maybe you’ll go someday,” I said. And part of me wished I could be there to see the Eiffel Tower lights reflected in her eyes.
As I drove, she told me to take another turn, and I drew my eyebrows together. “We’re going to the Academy?”
She grinned as I turned into the empty parking lot. “I wasn’t sure if you were coming to the prom tonight, but I wanted you to see the decorations.”
“I’d like that,” I said. All the Emerson Academy proms were hosted at fancy hotels in grand ballrooms. Never in the school gymnasium like at some public schools.
I was eager to see what they’d done with this place.
We got out of the car and walked through the empty parking lot of our school. Well, really, it was her school now.
I had so many memories of this place—of hanging out by Stefon’s car before school with other cheerleaders and football players. I remembered the bench where I’d sat next to Stefon as he asked me to prom. The stairs were steep as ever, unforgiving after a hard practice with lots of leg work.
And then there was the inscription above the entrance—Ad Meliora. It meant toward better things, and if I was being honest, I didn’t really think that was true for me. High school was supposedly the best years of your life, and it certainly looked that way on the outside. I had a handsome “boyfriend,” had the plastic homecoming crown on display in my room, and spent more weekends at parties than alone at home. But underneath all the smiles and selfies, it had been there. The feeling like I didn’t quite fit in. Like my whole life could come crashing down at any moment.
As I walked beside this girl who had bravely, publicly, been herself for the last year, I wondered if maybe she was the one who had it figured out all along.
She stopped outside the double doors to the gym and gave me one of those breathtaking smiles. “Are you ready for the gayest prom decorations ever?”
A giggle spilled out my lips. “Absolutely.”
She pushed the door open and held it for me with her arm extended, Vanna White style. I felt the warmth of her body as I brushed past her and took it in. The space was incredible, with blue vinyl protecting the hardwood floors and all shades of blue tulle drawing down from a circular spot in the ceiling. There was a massive boat I thought I recognized from the last school play and tables topped with aquariums of fish.
Following my gaze, Xi said, “The fish are fake. But they look real from here, huh?”
“They do. It’s beautiful, Xi,” I said, turning to face her.
“Thank you.” She smiled back at me. In the dim lighting, her olive skin was tinted blue, and I felt like a fish swimming in the deep, dark pools of her eyes.
It was so quiet here, just the two of us, and I found myself wanting to kiss her. To taste her lips and feel her touch.
But my phone began ringing.
Xi looked away from me, touching a ring on her thumb, and I reached for my phone, seeing Stefon’s name on the screen.
“Hello?” I said.
“Where are you?” he asked over the background noise. “They have abouncy slide.”
“I...” I glanced toward Xi. I wasn’t ready to share her. Not yet.
She gave me a questioning look, and I muted my speaker.
“Can it be my turn to show you something?” I asked.
She smiled, nodded.
“You don’t mind missing the festival?”
