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I will not cry in front of this man. I will not cry. I will not cry.
He walked up to me and tried to touch me, but I moved out of the way. I could feel my heart racing. I wanted to yell at him and ask him so many questions. But I would not give him a chance to lie to me.
"Lindsey," he whispered to me.
It took everything in me not to turn and answer him. He knew how much I loved hearing him call my name, and it all felt like a tactic that he was using to get me to talk to him.
"Are you really going to ignore me? It was the heat of the moment. I’m really, really sorry for my words," his voice breaking a little.
It was almost as if he was pleading with me to talk to him. I didn't look at him, but I could tell he needed someone to talk to. I wished I could be that person, but I was done with him; I didn't want anything to do with him anymore.
Whatever hurt he felt, he could go talk it out with Lauren.
After all, I was just a vacation fling for him. She was the one carrying his child.
Chapter 21
Trev
WhenIwokeupthat morning, my head was foggy. I had slept for hours, but was not rested. More sleep beckoned, but I knew my problems would still be waiting for me when I woke up.
I wanted to go into her room without knocking, but then I remembered her anger. I knocked, but when I got no response, I realized she’d be in the kitchen making breakfast.
I was glad to see her there. From the moment I stepped foot in the kitchen, I could tell something was off. Her shoulders drooped as if she was down. She moved lazily. I could tell she was bothered by something.
After I spoke to her and she didn't reply, I moved close to her and tried to touch her shoulder. In my head, I should be able to clear up our misunderstanding by being sincere. But when she jerked away before I touched her, I knew there was more to it.
I had been rude to her before, but she had never given me such a cold, silent treatment. Maybe we just weren't close enough yet.
And here you are, like the rude jerk she takes you for, making excuses for … being a rude jerk! Wake up, man!
I left the kitchen feeling hurt and stupid. I hated how she had ignored me but what I hated more was the fact that I really needed to talk to her.
I tried to forget the news Lauren had given me, but it was just too big a deal to simply toss aside. The thought that I was going to be a father scared me. I wasn't ready for such responsibility.
Hell, I haven’t given a thought to if I even want tohavekids.
I went back to my room and tried to get to work. In vain. I couldn't focus. I knew what to do for the new game, but I wasn't in the right headspace. My mind was racing between Lauren and Lindsey.
I got to thinking about Lauren and her news.
Not news. More like an accusation. Or … blackmail … Was I really the father?
I started to have doubts.
Then I thought about Lindsey ignoring me.
After the way you treated her your first couple days here? Seriously?
Still trying to kid yourself about your behavior, huh?
I hated to admit it, but I needed her. I craved her presence, wanted her to smile at me and make me feel like everything was going to be okay. I had half a mind to go back downstairs and force a conversation.
So why are you stalling?
I didn't really care how stupid or desperate it made me look, but I changed my mind when I realized that it would only make matters worse.
By midday, I finally gave up on the illusion of working and decided to go out for a walk. I got downstairs and saw Lindsey at reception. She glanced my way, our eyes met, and my heart leaped. For a moment I thought she was over her anger, but before I could say a word to her, she looked away.
