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“True,” Karen whispered in understanding. “He is not the same anymore, is he?”
“Nope. He is almost as paranoid as me… or John,” Emily admitted. “Oh gosh, John is going to flip his lid,” she muttered, putting her hands over her face once again. “He flat out said he wasn’t ready for children, and might never be.”
“Well,” Karen began. “It sounds like he better get there fast – because he’s got about eight months to figure it out. Oh, and Emily?”
“Yeah?”
“Can I get a ride home?”
CHAPTER31
EMILY
Emily triedto hold back the roaring case of nerves within her as the week wore on. She had her first ultrasound and confirmation that she was indeed pregnant… and everything felt so surreal.
Her little apartment would be bursting at the seams in no time – and she would need to focus on emptying the tiny bedroom that she used as storage, creating a nursery instead. This was all so strange, so outside of what she ever imagined her life would be like…
She never imagined marriage… or a child.
Oh, she hadhopedfor marriage at some point, hoping to be happy because she’d been so lonely before John, but what if telling him that she was pregnant – she lost him?
That thought was terrifying.
She and Karen were having similar, but very different, experiences. Her sister was so excited, so happy, and downright thrilled, because everything seemed to be falling into place for her. Jace was going to be coming home in a month – for good – and Karen was plotting how she was going to tell him about the baby.
Emily had no idea how much longer John was going to serve in the Air Force, and that was not something they’d ever talked about or touched on… and she was terrified at how he was going to react to the news.
Gosh, she loved him – and was so scared to damage things between them. Even his last email had been so sweet, so gentle and loving, that it made her start crying all over again.
He’d been so tender, writing a paragraph in French to her that took a little work to translate, but when she did? She melted, and felt fear take hold of her yet again. The note had said…
… Yes, that’s good, my heart. I love it when you speak French, my life. You are my reason for breathing. I love you, more than you will ever know. I want to whisper sweet nothings in your ear, my beautiful wife.
There was so much unfettered beauty in the friendship and love that they’d found unexpectedly, that the thought of upsetting him bothered her intensely… and it wasn’t something she could hide - nor could she get ‘rid’ of it.
This was a little part of them both, a miracle, that she was going to cling to, no matter how frightened she was – and today was the day she was going to have to tell him.
John was scheduled to arrive around two PM today. Her phone rang in that moment, and she took a deep breath before answering, just to calm herself.
“Hello?”
“Hey Em. I just needed to hear your voice,” John said happily, and she felt her nose burn at the sudden rush of emotion it created in her. “I’m in Charlotte and getting ready to board the plane for the last leg of the trip, but I wanted to reach out. I can’t wait to see you, my love.”
“I can’t wait to see you,” she whispered thickly.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah, just really excited to see you soon.”
“I’ll be there in Tyler in about two-to-three hours or so.”
“I’ll be waiting at the airport for you,” she smiled tremulously, picking up the diaper bag from the doctor’s office and quickly putting it in a closet to hide it. She was going to tell him, but it needed to be the right moment… not spring it on him the second he walked in the door.
“Em, are you okay? You sound different,” he said quietly, his voice concerned.
“I’m fine. I’m just a little tired and didn’t sleep well last night,” she admitted. “I was so excited about you coming back to see me, and ended up nervously cleaning until midnight.”
“Oh Emily… my precious love,” John chuckled. “You don’t need to do anything but just smile at me. Relax, hon… it’s just me.”
