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Give it a try without Brandon, is what she is saying in not so many words. And it's like she can read my mind and knows exactly what I need without me even having to tell her how I'm feeling. Aunty Jules’s holiday villa is cute. A bit rundown and rustic-looking, but I could be okay with that for reduced rent and a chance to do my own thing. "I'll think about it." I smile, and it's genuine because that is actually the best news I have heard in a while.
"You really should. Andy and Brad are out back telling Jasmine and Axel about their honeymoon. You should go find them while I finish up in here. Take another piece of this with you first." She shoves the plate in my direction, and I reluctantly take another square then wander out back to see the others. Jasmine steals the slice right out of my hand, popping it in her mouth, and drags me by her side to catch up with Andy.
"Hey, that was supposed to be for me," I protest, not really bothered.
"I know. The rest of us weren't allowed to touch the dessert Mom made for her favorite." She rolls her eyes with an over-the-top smile. She knows she's the favorite, not me.
"Oh my God, Cass, I'm so glad you're here! You have to listen to this." Andy drags me into the group.
They’re all so happy to see me that my nerves start to settle. This is just a normal family lunch like we have done a million times before. But I haven't seen any signs of Dad yet, so that could all change quickly.
While Andy and Brad chat away, telling us about their travels, I glance over to Amelia. She's hanging by the pool with her kids. I offer her a wave. This is the longest I have gone without talking to one of my sisters, and it's killing me. I just want things to be okay with us.
She calls out an instruction to the kids and comes sheepishly over to me. "Can I talk to you for a second?"
"I think that's a good idea." I sigh, knowing this conversation was coming today, but I’m not sure if I want to hear what she has to say. I follow her onto the lawn, away from the rest of our family, where we can watch her kids playing in the pool. She leans against the fence looking out over the pool. We stand like this for a while, just watching her kids. Ruby is on a heart-shaped rubber floatie with her sunglasses on, looking older then her eight years, and Connor is swimming about close enough to her that he's splashing her when he kicks, and every time he does she calls over to Amelia for her to make him stop.
"Connor, the pool is massive, swim down the opposite end to your sister," Amelia yells back.
I laugh under my breath, saying, "‘But Mom, it's so much more fun to annoy my sister.’ Being the youngest sucks, you always get picked on."
"I'm sorry about the way I behaved at the wedding." She offers me a genuine smile. "I was a total bitch to you when I found out about Brandon. But I need you to know, I'm happy for the two of you, and it wasn't because I have a thing for him or don't want you to be happy, I do."
I look at her, trying to understand why then. She’s so cute in her little perfectly coordinated outfit, the only parent of us sisters, but she still manages to show up, full face of makeup and not a hair out of place of her low ponytail, while I look like I'm about to go for a jog in sneakers and tights. "What was it then? I was so shocked at your reaction because it was so out of character for you."
She turns back to me with tears in her eyes, and I wrap an arm around her. Why is she so upset?
"Oh, Amelia. What's going on?"
"I'm sorry about the waterworks, I'm just so tired. I feel like I'm about to fall apart, you know. And I can't. I have to be the strong one for the kids."
Shit, I had no idea she was feeling like this. I rub her back, trying to comfort her. "Even the strongest people fall apart sometimes. You're allowed to cry when it all gets too much. Let us be your strength when you need a break." I have never seen her like this. Her life has been turbulent over the last few years, after her husband left, but she never skips a beat. I thought she was okay.
"Thank you, but the truth is, I really can't. I'm afraid if I do, I won't be able to keep going. And then what?"
"Then your family rallies around you and helps you pick up the pieces," I tell her, and she gives me a small smile.
"Thank you, Cassie. When did you get so smart?"
"Been through some shit myself, so you know, I guess it helps."
"I hope you and Dad can work out your differences. He's stubborn, but he loves you." The mention of Dad makes me feel sick again. That's what I want too. I hate fighting with my family, but he's the one who has made it so hard.
"Yeah, I know. It's time he realizes I'm a grownup. I'm sure we will work it all out when he calms down." But right now, this isn't about me. Amelia needs me, and for once, I want to be that sister, the one someone else can rely on. "What did you want to tell me?"
By the way she looks at me, I can see the turmoil she's going through.
"You can tell me anything," I assure her.
"No one else knows this, not even Jasmine, so it has to stay between us. It's a self-preservation thing. You know, the oldest child having to be the one with her shit together." She says it like a joke, but I can tell for her it's deadly serious.
"You know that's not true, but okay. I won't tell a soul." I cross over my heart so she knows I'm for real.
"You know Brandon and I have been friends for a long time, but since high school, I didn't really reconnect with him until a couple of years ago." I look at her, my eyes wide, my heart pounding a bit faster. Is she about to tell me they had a thing or something? I don't think I could handle hearing that.
"It's not what you're thinking." She gives me a look. "I ran into him in LA at a time in my life when things were really tough. Declan had left me in all sorts of financial trouble, and my business was very fresh. I was in the city trying to get some new stores on board to grow my brand, and I had been told no after no all day long. I knew where my brand could go if someone would just give me a chance. As luck would have it, I ran into Brandon that day, and he helped me get out of the hole I was in."
"He gave you money?" I ask, surprised. If she needed money, she could have just gone to our parents. Surely, they would’ve helped her.
