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I chuckle, caught up in the word. I don’t think it’ll ever get less scary, but I know one thing: I’ll never be tired of hearing it from him.
30
Ford
Never thoughtI’d be a grown-ass man, attending a Halloween party as a hot dog. At least I’ve got my bottle of mustard beside me, and being one of those matching-costume couples isn’t something I’d thought I’d be either.
Especially because Ilikeit.
Art’s closed off the entire bar for his Halloween party, not just the mezzanine upstairs, and there are more people here than I’ve ever seen in the one place. I know he’s a social person, but this is ridiculous. There are jack-o’-lanterns everywhere, the lights have been switched out for red bulbs, and creepy monsters are hanging out in every nook and cranny of the bar.
“Want a drink?” Orson asks.
I nod, and he leaves, the top of his mustard bottle visible over the crowd. Making my way through the legions of superheroes, furry animals, and Disney characters, I spot Barney with his boyfriend, Leif, across the room.
They’re both dressed as pirates; Barney’s costume is short and tight, exposing more skin than I’ve ever seen my friend show, and Leif’s looks like something that would be made for a movie. It’s layered and detailed, concerningly realistic.
“You two look great,” I say, approaching them. “Why pirates?”
Barney mutters, “Oh no,” before Leif pumps his eyebrows at him.
“He’s not a pirate. He’s my wench.” Leif slaps Barney’s meaty ass, and Barney blushes out to his roots.
I laugh. “Embarrassed?”
“Turned on.” Barney squirms and, if possible, turns even redder.
The connection between those two runs deep, and even if I don’t love the oversharing, it’s a small price to pay for them to be together.
Barney’s ex-husband was a bit of a stick in the mud. He never would have shown up here in costume, let alone with Barney having half of his ass hanging out.
“I think if anyone should be embarrassed here, it’s you,” Leif says, pointedly looking my hot dog costume over.
I try to shrug, but I’m not sure the action is recognizable in this. “We wanted to be matching, and it was last minute finding something. Besides, I don’t think I could have paid Orson to wear something that slutty.”
“He’s missing out,” Barney says.
And so am I. Picturing Orson with that Ford butt plug in, shirttails covering his ass so when he bends over … Not an image I need to bring up in the middle of a party.
“Where is Orson?” Barney asks.
“Went to get drinks.”
“Speaking of …” Leif smacks a kiss on Barney’s cheek. “I’ll grab you another one.”
“It’s like you’re trying to get me drunk.”
“Just wanna see my baby have fun.” Leif winks and leaves us alone.
“He’s got a point, you know,” I say as Barney watches him walk away, love-dumb expression on his face. “I like you having fun.”
“I always have fun.”
“Not like now, you didn’t. You’ve always held back. Leif’s good for you.”
“And apparently, Orson’s good for you if you’re suddenly this knowledgeable about relationships.”
Well, he’s got me there. “Good point. I know fuck all, only that it feels good.”
