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"Hey, honey, you better go get yourself checked," Mrs. Baker told me when she was free enough to talk to me.
"I'm fine, Mrs. Baker, it's just a little morning sickness...that seemed to linger more than the morning?" I quizzed myself about the last statement.
There was a smile creeping up on Mrs. Baker's face that widened when I gave her a blank look.
"What? Do I really look that bad?"
"Oh, no my dear. Now is not the time to look bad. Wait till you're seven months in; there'll be nothing worse than your face," she joked without mercy.
"I don't understand..." My puzzled look still remained on my face, but she remained comical about the whole thing and left me with nothing but more confusion.
Do fevers really last that long?
As I was leaving work at the end of my shift, Mrs. Baker walked me out of the building, which happened regularly. We talked about shallow topics - the weather, store politics, and the rest -but before we split ways, she shoved something into my hands and whispered, "Good luck” before climbing into the bus that took her home. Looking down at my palms, I saw that she had placed a pregnancy test strip.
Realization dawned on me. With lightning speed, I began to recall all my sexual experiences with Alessandro from the very first time to the most recent one. Not once had we ever used protection.
Fuck.
** ** ** ** ** ** ** **
I sat on the toilet floor, observing the thin object from afar like it was some kind of mini explosive object that would detonate itself only when it senses motion. In a way, the result of the next thirty seconds would be explosive. I honestly did not want to witness how this ended. I began to mentally scold myself as the seconds ticked by.
'What kind of infatuation did you let befall you like this Sienna? How could you have been so careless?'
Suddenly, I started feeling embarrassed about my craving for him, how I longed for his length and girth inside me and the face of satisfaction I made when he came inside me.
'You most certainly didn't think this through...'
It wasn't up to a minute; I was sure because I was watching the timer tick on my phone, but it felt like...no, not years...like a second. What was supposed to stay away from me forever called me for a peek. It was one I couldn't ignore.
Maybe I should postpone it and just leave it for later...when I'm more prepared.I thought, but again, I decided against it.
"Now or never," I whispered to give myself the courage and stretched myself to take a peek at the result area. Two blue lines.
Positive.
I shrank back to my former position to wear off the nausea from the initial force I had used to stand up, hoping that it was the nausea that made me see double lines when I should have seen a single.
Come to think of it, I think I saw double strips even.
Using my feet, I pinned a part of the drip down and used the grip between the floor and my feet to pull it to myself. With a pounding chest and a braced mind I gave it one more look and let it drop to the floor. Still doubtful, I took another look at the strip. Each look I gave formed a deeper pit in my stomach.
"Positive," I echoed and laughed sarcastically at how careless I had been.
How was I going to tell Alessandro?
With really nervous steps, I made my way out of the bathroom, only to find him on my bed with his phone as usual, engrossed in messaging someone.
"I didn't know when you came in," I said and sat on the bed beside him. He just settled for staring hard at me. I moved in to give him a kiss, but he didn't kiss me back; he just let me rummage his lips before detaching in disappointment.
"What's wrong, Alessandro? You've been acting differently lately towards me. What did I do wrong?" I whined and wrapped my arms around him, wishing that he'd hold me back. Instead, his arms just stayed limp by his sides.... with his fists clenched.
He didn't answer my question. Instead, he settled for asking me one of his own.
"Did you check your phone recently?"
"Why?"
