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I decided it was best that I hadn’t crossed the line with him back then anyway. Especially since he would have been my first.
Serena’s friendship meant more to me than whatever this ridiculous attraction was, and I knew that in time, it was going to fade away.
At least that’s what I had been telling myself my whole life.
“We should go out tonight and get wasted. My treat.”
“I can’t tonight. I’m fried. Raincheck?”
“Awww come on! Please come out with me? Pretty, pretty, pretty please?” Serena tugged my arm.
“I have got to get to bed early, I’m wiped. Next time,” I promised.
“Awww fine. You’re gonna miss out though! I’ll call you later then.”
“No don’t,” I laughed “I’ll be asleep!”
“Oh right, well go home soon and get your beauty rest then.”
A few hours later, I was powering down my laptop and getting ready to go home for the day. While I waited for the elevator, I leaned against the wall, totally wiped out from the week. The elevator doors finally pinged open, I got in and sagged against the wall. Before they slid shut, a hand darted out, and the doors swung open.
Killian got onto the elevator, one hand shoved into his pocket, and the other holding a phone up to his face. He cast a quick smirk in my direction before tapping something on his ear. When he shifted, I caught a whiff of his cologne, a mixture of bergamot and neroli, and my stomach gave an odd little flip.
Relief flooded my system when the elevator opened on the ground floor, and I stumbled out, refusing to glance back over my shoulders. In the car, I held the steering wheel in a vice-like grip and turned up the music to drown out the noise in my head. Before I knew it, I was pulling up outside my apartment building and getting onto another elevator.
Once the lock clicked open, something white darted out of the darkness and in between my legs. I flicked on the light, lowered my bag onto the floor and bent down and scooped up my little fur baby, Skittles. I nuzzled him and scratched behind his ears. He tilted his head back, green eyes peering up at me, and meowed.
“How was your day, Skittles? Sorry, I’m late.”
I set him down, and Skittles let out another meow and rubbed himself against my leg. “I know. It was a long day for me too. Why don’t I get you some food, and I’m going to get some takeout.”
Skittles hopped onto the counter, his tail swishing back and forth steadily. I gave him another pat before opening up a can of cat food. After placing an order of dumplings, noodles and kung pao chicken to the Chinese place a few blocks down, I peeled off my clothes and left them in a heap on the floor and got into the shower. Hot water cascaded down my back and over my shoulders, relaxing my muscles.
But Killian still wouldn’t leave my mind.
When I got out, a thick cloud of steam followed me into the room as I changed into a pair of sweatpants and a frayed red hoodie from my days in state college. I gathered my clothes off the floor and tossed them into a hamper. Skittles was eating noisily on the counter when the doorbell rang, and feeling my stomach growl, I remembered my takeout order, and I raced to the door to get it. I sat on my couch and cued up my TV looking for a rom-com, while I started on my dinner.
Oh my god I needed this, what day.
I slurped up the last of the noodles and threw the leftover dumplings into the fridge.
One glass of wine later, I crawled into bed and stared up at the ceiling.
I kept seeing Killian’s face, a half smirk on his lips.
Then I saw his expression change and hunger written in his eyes.
I traced my hand lightly over my breasts, rolling my nipples in between my fingers until they grew stiff and hard.
With a sigh, I lifted my hips up off the mattress and lowered my sweatpants. I ran a finger down the length of my stomach and ran my hand under the waistband of my panties. Using my other hand, I pushed my breasts together. I squeezed my eyes shut and caressed myself.
But it was Killian I pictured doing this.
His mouth on my breasts, sucking and tugging until I was panting his name.
I pushed down my panties and imagined Killian using his mouth to tug them down over my thighs before throwing them over his shoulders. It made me hot with desire thinking about his deft hands, and how they would caress me in just the right way. When I stroked myself, it was Killian who touched me, his bright eyes wide with raw, animal hunger.
I moaned and pushed one finger in between my wet folds.
