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Caleb and I, we’ve come a long way in the past few months since he was pulled over with his friends for having moonshine and drugs in a car, and since he was caught drunk in public. We’ve gotten closer, we call each other on our shit, and there aren’t secrets between us anymore. Except for our love lives, he knows all about safe sex, and as long as he’s practicing it, I’m good. I have zero desire to know who or what my son is screwing, and I’m sure he feels the same way about me.
“Then that’s something I’ll work on. I’m not gonna lie and say there aren’t days and nights when I’m not lonely. When you were younger, it was easier for me to stay busy, and even during the last few years. I’ve worked a lot of overtime to be able to provide you with options for college, unlike what I had. Only to find out, you didn’t even need it.” I give him a grin. He’s been accepted to the University of Alabama on a full-ride football scholarship, and I’ve never been prouder of him. All the time I’d worked, all the money I’d saved, it’s still worth it, because it’ll give him a jumpstart on life I never had. But I’m quickly beginning to realize I’ve got to make myself happy too. He’s not going to be here, and if my life is wrapped up in him? Then there’s no life for me to live.
“Now’syourtime, Dad.” He nods toward me. “You do you, I don’t need you around all the time like I used to. As long as we get to eat dinner together a few times a week and get to spend a couple of days a month together, I’m good. If I have to share you with a woman, I will. You’re gonna be lonely when I leave for Tuscaloosa in the summer.”
My chest physically hurts at those words. “Don’t remind me. I don’t know what I’m going to do without you here.”
“Now’s the time to find out, don’t waste it. I’m sure you’ll find something or someone to occupy your time with.” He flashes me a smartass grin.
“I’m sure I will too.”
Truth was though; I really wanted to spend my time with Karina. If only I could get her to return my attempts to get in touch with her.
* * *
Grocery shopping ismy least favorite responsibility of being an adult. Always has been, always will be. I can do laundry, vacuum, dust furniture, passably cook – you name it, I do it all. The one thing I typically fail at? Grocery shopping. I never go until we have absolutely nothing in our fridge. My list is literally a mile long on my phone, and I’m already over it.
“Hey Mason.” I hear a female voice, as I round the corner into the produce section.
“Hey.” I wave slightly at the woman speaking to me. I’ve seen her around town before, have spoken with her a few times, but I can never remember her name. And right now she’s standing in front of the asparagus I need to go with one of the meals I have planned for the week. That’s right, I’m a meal planner. If I wasn’t, nothing would ever get cooked or we’d just have cereal every night. “Mind if I get in there.” I point behind her. “I’m kinda in a hurry; it’s been a long day.”
She looks me up and down, taking in the uniform I’m wearing. I’ve gotten enough looks like this to know she appreciates the way I fill it out. She’s probably thinking of an officer fantasy in her head, and I’m the star of the show. Today I don’t have patience for it. All I want to do is get home, make dinner, and chill. The one woman I want the attention of still isn’t paying any to me.
“I’m sure you did. Must be hard to go home and take care of your son at the end of the day by yourself.”
It takes everything I have not to roll my eyes. “These days not so much, considering he’s an adult. Turned eighteen at the beginning of the month. He doesn’t need me all the time anymore.” I make a lunge at a wrapped bunch of asparagus.
She grabs hold of it, yanking it to pull me closer to her. “Then maybe you need someone to take care of you? There’s gotta be needs you have that aren’t being fulfilled.”
Her voice has dropped to levels that just aren’t appropriate for the grocery store, and they aren’t appropriate for me – ever. This isn’t the woman I want, she’s not the one who’s been keeping me up at night with a hard-on. She’s not the one I’ve been fantasizing about as I take care of business in the shower. Out of the corner of my eye I see hair and a body I would know anywhere. She’s leaving the grocery store, and all I want to do is run after her, ask her exactly why she’s been avoiding me.
Ignoring the woman still speaking to me, I move my cart toward the checkout lines, but we have people, carts, and checkout lanes in between us. I can’t leave the food I’ve picked up; we need it at the house. With one last ditch effort, I yell her name.
“Karina!”
She glances back, her eyes widen in recognition, and just like that she’s swallowed up in the afternoon rush of grocery shoppers. “Damnit.” I beat my hand against the handle of the cart.
Something I do know for sure now, that I didn’t know with certainty before: She lives here. No one else would be going to this hole-in-the-wall one stop shop if they didn’t. Now I just have to figure out what it’ll take for her to speak to me again – and maybe give me another shot.
One thing about me is that I don’t give up easily. I felt something with this woman, something I’ve never felt before, not even with Caleb’s mom, and I’ll be damned if I just let it walk away without trying to explore it.
One way or another, hopefully I’ll get an answer.
CHAPTER 3
KARINA
My heart poundsas I throw my grocery bags into my trunk and then hop into my car speeding away from the grocery store. I’m not sure why it unnerves me so much that Mason was there, not sure why seeing him caused such a reaction within me, I’m seriously not sure of anything right now. All I know is the way he made me feel in those few hours I’ll never forget. I want it again, but I’m not sure if I’m brave enough to invite this man back into my life. He could break me in ways my ex-fiancé never did.
Nothing I got at the grocery is in danger of spoiling, and right now I’m not looking to go home to an empty house. With my free hand, I pick my cell phone up from my cup holder and use the voice to text option to text one of the only friends I have here, Violet. Even being here for almost two years, it’s been hard to make acquaintances. Most people don’t come to Laurel Springs; most are born here and move away or are born here and stay here. It’s not necessarily the destination of many graduates, but I’ve found a home here. One I enjoy, even if it’s lonely sometimes.
K: Care to get a coffee? I really need someone to talk to.
V: Sure! Anthony’s working tonight, and I just left The Café, it was totally dead tonight. If you don’t care that I’m dressed like a waitress, I’ll be there.
K: Meet you there in about five minutes.
I’m taking my coffee to an empty table in the back when Violet walks in, wearing her uniform and a warm jacket. Her hair is in one of the fancy braids she likes to wear, and I’m struck by how happy she looks. There’s a glow to her face, a spring to her step, and an easy smile as she places her order. A year ago, she hadn’t been happy, she hadn’t worn her hair in a braid, and we hadn’t even been friends. I was blessed to meet her at a time when we both needed one.
