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She sighs then adds, "And we broke our contract."
Confusion mixes with fear. I ask, "We already went over this. The seventy-two-hour rule didn't apply to our situation."
She replies, "So things can't return to how they were."
"What do you mean? Technically, the contract ended once we got married and we decided to stay together past the finish date," I point out.
She caresses my head, then states, "I'm trying to put my cards on the table."
Her statement only freaks me out more. I blurt out, "Cards on the table?"
"Calm down," she orders.
I seethe, "All this sounds like to me is that you don't want what we had."
She cries out, "That's not it."
"Then how is it?" I question.
She pauses for a moment, then gives me a chaste kiss. It feels like a consolation prize. She retreats, then states, "I'm your wife. I'm back in your bed."
"Our bed," I correct her.
She smiles and slides her thumb over my jaw. "You're right—our bed. And I'm telling you I only want you."
"But you don't want me as I was…as we were," I point out.
She sighs, repeating, "You're taking this personally."
"How am I supposed to take it? You just said you didn't like our old life," I snarl.
In a stern voice, she declares, "No. I didn't."
"Sounds to me like you did," I say.
She glares at me, then flips and reaches for the lamp. She turns off the light and hugs her pillow. King Madden curls into her, and she asserts, "I'm tired. I don't want to fight. We'll talk about this tomorrow when you've calmed down."
I clench my fist, unsure how things turned so quickly. I stare at her for hours, watching her sleep, listening to King Madden breathe next to her, and growing more fearful of the future.
If she doesn't want our past, what does that mean for our future?
23
Blakely
Riggs's side of the bed is empty when I wake up. I rise, go to the window, and catch a glimpse of him in the surf. Is he still mad at me?
Of course he's still mad, I reprimand myself. Riggs isn't the type of man who will let this go.
I cringe inside, knowing I hurt him last night, but I'm unwilling to return to the same situation. How will we ever survive forever if I'm not his equal? It's something I never thought about before I married him. Now, the nagging voice inside my head screams that it'll never work unless we're true, equal partners.
If only I knew what equal meant.
I want everything we had back, and it would be easy to let Riggs take over again. It's the type of man he is and a huge reason why I love him. But if I rely on him to solve all my problems and make all the decisions, what value do I bring to our marriage?
And I want this to last a lifetime, but we must be on the same footing, or I'm no different than his other subs. So as much as I prefer him to take over, I have to figure out how to balance this out.
I turn from the window and go into the closet. I put on shorts and a tube top, not bothering to add a bra or underwear. Our beach is private, so I don't have to worry about anyone seeing me.
