Page 20 of Betting on Blaze

“No, it’s not,” Blaze agreed. “You really think that I should go to your mom’s?” he asked. He wasn’t usually unsure of himself in situations like this, but that’s how Blair made him feel—unsure about his every move.

“Yep,” Dell said, “you might have to do some begging, but I’m betting that my sister is ready to hear you out.” Dell grabbed a pen and paper to write down his mother’s information. “It will take you about an hour to get there,” he said.

“Thanks, man,” Blaze said. “I appreciate your help.”

“Just don’t fuck this up, Blaze,” Dell said. “And don’t hurt my little sister.”

“Never,” Blaze said. He’d never hurt Blair. He loved her and if she gave him the chance, he’d spend the rest of his life proving that to her.

Blair

Hearing Blaze ask her to marry him had her fight-or-flight instincts kicking in once again. Flight seemed to be her go-to move, so she took off on him, leaving no word as to where she was or when she’d be back. She should have told Dell where she was going, but she freaked out and just left town, drove the hour to her mom’s place, and camped out in her spare bedroom. Blair was there for answers, not that her mother had them to give to her, but she had to try.

Her entire life, she had worked hard to never become her mother. She worried that being saddled down by a man would mean that she’d end up alone and broken, just like her mom, but Blaze made her want to at least try. When he told her he loved her, she believed him. She loved him too, even though she hadn’t been able to give the words, but she wanted to.

When Blaze popped the question, asking her to marry him—well, that was a surprise. She thought that he was going to ask her to move in with him again, but he didn’t. Instead, he asked her to spend the rest of her life with him, and even though Blair wanted to tell him, yes, she found herself bursting into tears and running to her apartment to pack a bag. She knew that turning to her mother might not be her best move, but she also needed answers.

When she showed up at her mom’s place, she sat in her car for almost an hour trying to talk herself out of going into the house. She was just about to give up and turn back on her car when her mother knocked on her window and asked what she was doing there. She reluctantly got out of her car, grabbed her bag from the backseat, and followed her mother into the house.

It was almost as if the woman knew why she was there, not that she came right out and said it. Her mother could tell that she had shown up on her doorstep due to a man. Blair carefully explained everything that had happened over the past year and when she got to the part where Blaze asked her to marry him, her mother was smiling at her like a loon, tears spilling down her face.

Of course, her mother asked her if she was crazy; running away from a man who professed his undying love for her, and maybe she was. That’s when Blair spilled her guts about the rest of it—telling her mother that she was afraid of commitment because of her childhood. Yeah—that made her feel like an ass, especially when her mom broke down and apologized for everything. That wasn’t why she was there. Blair didn’t want to make her mom feel bad or expect an apology from her, but that’s what happened.

Blair turned in early that night and decided to try again the next day. She knew that a good night’s sleep might give her some perspective. When she woke up to find her mother on the phone with Dell, she panicked, remembering that she had forgotten to tell her brother that she was going to be staying with her mother for a few days. Her mother put her on the phone, and she explained everything to Dell, promising that she’d be home as soon as she could. Of course, her mother had questions once they got off the phone with him and it was time to sit down and talk to her mother—ready or not.

“What are you going to do?” her mother asked, handing her a cup of coffee.

“About what?” Blair asked, playing dumb.

“Don’t do that with me, Blair,” her mother said. “What are you going to do about your guy? I’m betting that your brother didn’t call to find you because he worried that you didn’t check in with him. That’s not Dell’s style. If I had to guess, I’d go with your boyfriend showing up at your apartment to ask your brother where you are, but it’s just a guess.”

“Oh, God,” Blair said. “Do you think he’ll show up here?” The last thing she was ready for was a showdown with Blaze. She’d buckle and end up accepting his marriage proposal, and what if that was the wrong decision?

“I have no idea, but if he does show up on my doorstep, I think you should consider his proposal. You obviously love him, Blair,” her mother said. She wasn’t about to deny how she felt about Blaze to her mother. The woman could see right through her.

“I do love him,” Blair agreed, “but, what if love isn’t enough? I mean, did you ever love Dad?”

“At first, yes,” her mother admitted. “But that was a long time ago. I was young and back in my day, women got married right out of high school. My family didn’t have much and I knew that if I stuck around at home, it would put a burden on my parents. Remember, I was one of nine kids. So, I took the first marriage proposal I got and moved out of their house and into your father’s place. We were happy, at first.”

“You were?” Blair asked. The most she could remember about her parents being together was their constant fighting, and then, after her father took off, her mother crying all the time. Their house was never quiet, and she was thankful when she grew up and was old enough to move out on her own. That was why it was so important for her to have her own place, even if it was hard to keep up with rent at times. She loved the peace and quiet in her apartment.

“I know that it’s hard to believe, but yes. Your father and I were in love and when you and your brother both came around, we felt so lucky to have you both. But then, your father lost his job and that’s when he started drinking. The booze made him mean, and I thought that we’d find a way through it all, but we didn’t. He became harder and harder to live with and eventually, he just gave up and left.”

“I remember how hard that was on you,” Blair said.

“It was, but I’ve learned how to be on my own. I know that you and your brother struggle with forgiving me, but I hope that someday, you’ll both find a way,” her mother said.

“There’s nothing to forgive, Mom,” Blair said. “You did what you had to do to take care of this place and yourself. I don’t blame you at all.”

“That’s nice of you to say, Blair, but I know the truth. You saw me as someone who became dependent on your father, and I was. After he left, I had to find a new normal, and learning to be on my own was hard. I think that’s why you’re so fiercely independent now. You don’t want to turn out like me.”

“That was true,” Blair admitted. “But talking to you now, I realize that you were a lot stronger than I gave you credit for.”

“Thank you for that,” her mother said. “I hope that you’ll listen to me now when I say that you’re nothing like me. You’re strong and independent and accepting your guy’s proposal won’t change that. You can find a happy medium and be dependent on each other if that makes sense.” It did make perfect sense. She just hoped that it wasn’t too late to make that happen with Blaze now.

“It does make sense. I just hope that Blaze will give me another chance. Every time he got too close, I pushed him away. I wasn’t very fair to him, Mom.”

“And if he’s half the guy that you’ve said that he is, he’ll understand,” her mother promised.

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