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“Don’t,” he cuts me off. “Not right now, Madison.”
Eventually, he holds my door open, then rounds the front of the car and gets behind the wheel.
The twenty-minute drive back to his house feels more like twenty hours.
He never looks at me. Never speaks to me. Nothing. Not a single word. And I hate every minute of it, but I have no idea whatIdid or if he’s even mad at me.
By the time we pull into his garage, I want to scream, and that kind of outburst goes against every instinct I’ve ever had.
Once Hudson turns the car off, I decide to take my chances and turn toward him. “I’m—”
“Nope.” He opens the door and gets out of the car. “We’re not doing this yet.” Then he slams the door behind him, and I watch as he stomps up the stairs and goes inside.
What?
Is he kidding me?
I follow him into the house, my own anger growing as I try to decide whether he’s mad at me or just mad.
And there he is, leaning against the counter in the kitchen with his head hanging low.
“Hudson—”
His head snaps up, and those dark eyes hold me hostage. “Don’t, Madison. Don’t speak. Not yet. You have no fucking clue what you did tonight.”
I tentatively step into him, forcing his head up and ask quietly, “What I did? Explain to me what I did. Because as far as I can see, the only thing I did was remove the two of us from the situation.”
Hudson swiftly picks me up and deposits me on the counter, so we’re eye level with each other, then cages me in. “What you did was put yourself in the mouth of the goddamned lion, Madison. You put yourself between two trained fighters instead of trusting me to handle it. Trusting me to protect you. That’s my world. Not yours.”
I press my palm flat against his chest, not pushing him but instead giving myself space to breathe. “I didn’t want you to get hurt again because of me.”
“You don’t get it. I wouldn’t have gotten hurt. But you could have. And there’s no fucking way I don’t kill that guy if he accidentally hits you instead of me. You’ve seen me fight, Maddie. But that’s been controlled. There are rules in the cage. Rules we all follow. There aren’t rules in a street fight. And I’m not gonna be controlled if something happens to you.” His hand slaps the counter next to my thigh, and I shiver. Not in fear... but at the way his skin grazes mine.
“You can’t put yourself in danger for me. That’s not how this works. You need to trust that I’ll always keep you safe.” Hudson lifts his hand to cradle my face, and a chill races down my spine. “I can handle getting hurt. I can’t handleyougetting hurt.”
“Hudson...” I fist his shirt as I search his eyes for an answer to my unasked question.
I hate that I put him in this position.
I hate that he’s mad at me.
And I really hate how desperate I am for him to kiss me right now. “I’m sorry. I... I didn’t think.”
A wave of emotion sweeps over his face before he drops his hands and steps back. “No. You didn’t.” Without another word, he turns on his heels and walks out of the kitchen and up the stairs, leaving me speechless and wondering what the heck just happened.
* * *
Eventually,I head upstairs and stare at the clothes in my suitcase.
I was supposed to stay the night and go home tomorrow, but I don’t stay places I’m not wanted. Not anymore. Not ever again. And Hudson is fine. If he could go out tonight, he doesn’t need me here. I honestly think he didn’t need me at all, he just didn’t want me alone after the break-in, and that simultaneously aggravates me and melts my anger a little.
I’ve never been confused by this man in all the years I’ve known him.
We’re friends. That’s it. I’ll always wonder if there could be more between us, but it won’t work. It can’t. And I can’t do this to myself. I refuse to.
With my mind made up, I throw on a pair of leggings and a hoodie, then grab my stuff from the bathroom and toss it into my bag. I didn’t have that much with me, so it only takes a minute to pack it up before I’m adding my MacBook to my work bag and sitting it on top of my suitcase, ready to go.
When I turn around, a scream gets caught in my throat.
