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“Courting? Jesus fuck, Sienna. Get your life together. This isn’t the 1800s,” I grumble, my finger closing out the app to take off some of the pressure I feel to say anything just to keep the conversation going.

I open TikTok and decide to reply to some comments to distract me from the man on the other app. I go through the notifications to make sure I answer all questions first. I love that people have a way to so easily ask me anything they want, and if I can’t get back to them right away, my followers jump in to help them out.

The reading order of one of my series? My amazing reader @christi_marxen answered that three hours ago and even included all the short stories in her numbered list.

Which book should they start with? My sweet supporter @ginarodriguezwells gave them the rundown of which books are funny and which are dark, so they can pick depending on what mood they’re in.

Where do I find inspiration? @redhare05, @lookitsjordy, and @1977photography all pounce on that one, commenting with their favorite characters and who they’ve heard me say inspired him or her.

Do they need to read the books in order? @amandavandemeulengraaf and @wholu2020 go back and forth about the pros and cons of reading them chronologically by how they were released. And @whitneyreadsromance and @shaurinotsorry assure that they’re all standalones and can be read in any order.

And then I have tags from @floweraura, @orithedraw, and @biblio_mama to blind-duet with other TikTokkers’ videos who remind them of my different characters, which I record immediately so I can see what they mean. My readers never fail to blow me away by totally nailing the image I had in my head when writing the hero or heroine or even a side character, and I love being able to give them a genuine reaction, when they took the time to tag me after thinking of me.

Getting near the end of my new notifications, I see @cecesbooknook, @mishagalli, @cassiehargroveauthor, @afox1537, @huntersmoontrading, @brocococreations, and @drinker.belle have all tagged me in a comment under the same video, which I can tell because of the thumbnail next to each of their names. It always makes me super curious when this happens, because it either means my readers are giving me a shoutout under a booktokker’s recommendation request—the best feeling ever!—or that there’s a thirst trap—a post by a hottie meant to be attention-grabbing by using sex appeal—that really captures something from one of my books. This time, it’s the latter, and I make sure to duet the video and reply to each one of their tags to thank them.

Finally, I’m elated to see @shannon_hezakhai and @reasbooks_ have made review videos about two of my books. The fact that they always take the time to record their thoughts and showcase their excitement about the stories they read makes me proud that I have the ability to make a reader feel the same way I do when I read some of my favorite authors’ books. It’s still surreal to me when people call me their favorite author, and don’t even get me started on the ones who now have my stories incorporated in tattoos permanently inked into their skin. That’s just mind-boggling.

When I’m all caught up on notifications, I hop onto my own page to see what the last video I posted was. It’s been a while, almost a week, because I just haven’t felt up to being creative. And because filters only help so much. It almost makes me believe being on these dating sites and having zero luck even holding one exhilarating conversation—until tonight—has made me feel worse than I already did.

It was one thing being single and lonely when I didn’t even try to put myself out there. It’s an entirely different thing being single and lonely and having put in a stupid number of hours scouring the internet for just one decent human male to chat with and coming up empty.

And while I’ve learned a lot from the one gentleman on the sugar daddy site, it’s done nothing for my loneliness, which I know is my own fault, because I put up all the roadblocks that kept him detoured in the “book research only” zone.

Realizing that, why am I fighting tooth and nail to keep Gym Daddy between those same lines?

Because you want to be chased.

My face rearranges itself to ask a resounding WTF?

Go ahead. Try to deny it. Why else would you be pumping the brakes on the one guy you’ve had the hots for since you got dumped?

My head jerks back, even though the person being rude is inside of it, not in front of me.

“Um, first of all, I did not get dumped. It was a mutual agreement to go our separate ways when we realized we would be happier not married to each other. Second… I’ve had the hots for more than one guy. It just so happens that the other two are completely unrecognizable because I have no idea what they look like. Which should actually mean a lot, if that show Love is Blind is anything to go by. Being attracted to a man when you haven’t even seen his face? Now that’s something special.”

Source: www.allfreenovel.com
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