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The road gods shined down on me as I pulled onto the highway, and I was the only one traveling my way. When I turned on her road, I was feeling much better about the bonfire and my choice to invite Tara. This might not be the disaster I’d envisioned. Imagine if it all turned out okay? That thought might have been the scariest I’d had all day, which was saying a lot when you considered everything that had happened to me. The lights of the house were shining bright as I pulled into the driveway. I felt like I was on autopilot as I slid out of the cab, feeling the gravel crunch under my feet. A few steps from the front porch, I finally gave myself credit for making it this far. Managing a smile, I knocked on the door.

11

TARA

My room was cluttered with the clothes I’d dumped from my suitcases. It looked like a bomb had gone off, or I’d been transported back to my childhood when cleaning my room had been the furthest thing from my mind. I’d been staring at the pile for an hour now, and I still didn’t know what to wear tonight. I would have run down the block to a boutique in DC and had an outfit put together in fifteen minutes flat. Cute little kitten heels and a mini dress. That wasn’t an option in Ashford, Tennessee. Smacking my forehead with my hand, I remembered where I was. That’s it! I was in Ashford, and unless my mother had moved my old clothes out of my closet to make way for storage and her crafts, I should have plenty of Ashford-type clothes options. Fingers crossed they still fit.

Tripping over a pile that had fallen off the bed, I nearly face-planted on the floor. When my knees hit, I groaned, rolling over onto my back. Lying there, all I could think was, Girl, you need to get your act together. I was acting like a schoolgirl headed to her first date. It wasn’t a good look.

Pushing up from the floor, I took a deep breath and tried again. This time, I made it to the closet safely. The doors rolled back easily, and my teen years came roaring back. My senior prom dress, the letterman’s jacket I’d insisted I needed because I played volleyball my freshman year and then never wore it again, an oversized hoodie I’d stolen from my crush, Max, and worn every chance I had. The nostalgia hit me hard, almost sending me to the floor again.

Balancing myself against the wall, I was more nervous than my first big interview. I knew it had more to do with blooming feelings for Landon that were taking over my brain than the possible opportunity to nail an interview with him. Despite still having my first crush’s sweatshirt, I was typically not the lovey-dovey type. I didn’t have the time or the patience for it. My attitude toward love was one of the things that bothered my mother the most.

She wasn’t the only one. My friend Dawn reminded me that I wasn’t getting any younger all the time. I countered by asking her the last time she’d been in a relationship, and she backed off pretty quickly. Checking the time, I needed to make a decision so that I could get in the shower. My best bet was to close my eyes, pick a shirt, and move on.

The nights were cool here, so I needed something to put over whatever shirt I chose as well. Throwing caution to the wind, I grabbed a couple of hangers and called it done. As I laid the shirts on my bed, a flash of Landon seeing me in the outfit and smiling ignited a heat between my legs. My breathing skipped a beat, and I was shocked by the effect on me. A familiar tingling in my core urged me to run my hand past my stomach, flirting with the top of my underwear. A creak above me stopped my movement. Was someone home? All I needed was one of my parents walking in on me with my hand down my pants. Maybe my mom would be happy I was getting it from somewhere? The thought caused a nervous giggle to bubble up my throat.

I shook my head and grabbed my toiletry bag, moving to my bathroom. A thought hit me, and I dashed back to my luggage, reaching into the zipped compartment that held a little toy for those times when I couldn’t get sex off my mind. I’d been smart and opted for the waterproof model. My effort to redirect my thoughts from Landon had only worked for a few minutes. The second there was a blank spot, I was back on the Landon train, thinking about him touching me. Not to mention the things I imagined doing to him.

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