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“I don’t know what came over me,” she replies. “You were so sweet, but I wanted you hard and fast. I swear I’ve never been this girl before.” Embarrassment clouds her words.
“Hey, that is never something to apologize for. I was going slow and sweet because I thought that might be what you want. But I will give it to you whatever way you want it. And hard and fast works for me.”
She rolls off me to lie on the pillow next to mine. “Look, Jonas, I haven’t exactly had an adventurous sex life. I’ve only been with one man before you, and it was always…very vanilla. Michael was getting it somewhere else, so I guess he just didn’t put much effort into it with me. So, I don’t need vanilla. I want you to show me everything there is. These few times we’ve been together have been far better than anything I’ve ever had. I feel like I’ve been missing out, and maybe I wouldn’t mind you showing me some things. I’ll try whatever you want.”
“Jesus, Andi,” I growl.
“What?”
“You just told a man that you’re willing to try anything. Do you know how fucking sexy that is? And I will fuck you every single day and do whatever you want. But make no mistake, you don’t have to do anything you’re uncomfortable with just because you’re trying to make me happy.”
She smiles and lays her head on my chest. “I know. And I thank you for that. But I’m not doing it for you. I’m doing it for me. You have given me some of the most mind-blowing orgasms over the past few days. I guess I want to see what else you have in your arsenal,” she giggles.
“Whoa, that puts a lot of pressure on me,” I laugh.
I roll her over so that I am on top of her once more and run my fingers between her legs. “But no time like the present to get to work.”
Chapter Twenty-two
Andi
The next morning, I am sitting in a large office overlooking Mitchell Ranch. Jonas Mitchell’s office, to be exact.
I told him he could stick me anywhere and show me the ropes, but he insisted this option would work out the best. All of the files are already on his computer, and if I am helping him out with office work, he will be able to be down on the ranch and not sitting behind this large desk.
Just looking around the room, I can tell that this certainly isn’t a place he likes to spend his time. Where his house is warm and cozy, this office is empty and cold. Sure, there’s a desk, a couple of chairs, and a few filing cabinets, but that’s about it. The only remotely personal touch is a framed picture of Beau that sits on the desk.
When I asked Jonas precisely what he wanted me to do, he really didn’t know. He said that for a while, he had an actual accountant come in and handle the books for him, but when she moved to Nashville to be closer to her kids, he hasn’t been able to find anyone else, so he’s just been handling everything himself for close to a year.
When I was managing the tech company's office back in California, I knew what they wanted out of the business, and I took steps to make those goals easier for them to achieve. I need to have the same talk with Jonas to see what his vision is for this place. My Type A Personality is itching to make a plan.
Maybe I should feel some way about taking a job working for the man I’m sleeping with. But I’m also sleeping with the guy who is my landlord, so my moral compass might already be a bit screwed. My scruples be damned. At this point, I will do anything to not sit inside all day with none of my stuff and nothing to do.
Getting up, I walk over to the large bay window and look out. I must say another perk to this gig is being able to look out and catch a glimpse of the fine-as-hell Jonas Mitchell. I can’t help but look at him like he’s the most attractive man I’ve ever seen (because he just might be), but what gets me is that he looks at me the same way. I’ve never been one to think much of the way that I look. And I’m not saying that in some sort of self-deprecating way. I’m never going to be some skinny supermodel, and I made peace with that a long time ago. And I’ve never had a man look at me like I was even close to being that attractive.
Until Jonas.
He looks at me like he can’t get enough. There’s a hunger in his eyes that seems as though it can only be fulfilled by all the dirty things he does to my body. He kisses me as though I contain the only oxygen in the room, and he needs me desperately to stay alive.
And he’s sweet, caring, compassionate, and a million other things that would take me all day to name. He makes me feel things I didn’t know if I would ever feel again.
As wonderful as all of this is, though, I have a sinking feeling in my gut that I just can’t seem to get over. A sinking feeling that, as amazing as this feeling is, it’s also fleeting.
In my world, happy endings aren’t a thing. Every foster home I went to, I prayed night after night that it would be the last and that I would find a forever home to settle down in. No matter how hard I prayed, and no matter how good I tried to be, it never lasted. It seemed like as soon as I started to get comfortable, it was all ripped away.
When Michael and I got together, I thought I was finally going to have my happily-ever-after, but it wasn’t quite as idyllic as I’d hoped. It felt like I was settling. Every time I would think we were making some sort of progress in our marriage, something would knock us ten steps back. And then, low and behold, when I finally started to think that maybe our problems were all in my head, he dies, and I find out he has this whole other life I didn’t know about.
Moral of the story? Don’t get too comfortable because you’re likely to have the rug ripped right out from under you.
That’s where this pit in my stomach is coming from. My heart wants to fall for this man. It’s urging me to let go of all of my hang-ups and let Jonas give me that happily-ever-after. But my head won’t let that happen. I don’t know if I will ever be comfortable enough to let that happen.
But I can’t deny how wonderful the past few days have been. Maybe we can live in our own little world for just a bit longer before everything comes crumbling down around us.
I’m in the middle of my thoughts when there is a slight tap on the door.
I turn toward the sound, and Jonas peeks his head in. Just the sight of him brings a smile to my lips.
“Can I come in?” He asks.
