AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“It is war. But right now, he's not budging, and Julian is adamant that he stays.”
"Is there something you want to tell me, babes?" Jamila studied me, her gaze a little too knowing.
"No, nothing to tell you."
"Oh, come on, hot bodyguard shows up. You hate him on sight. You took one look at him and you're ready to shoot first? What gives? Not to mention that screaming nightmare you had. That sounds like plenty to talk about."
I shook my head. I didn't want to get into it. How was I supposed to explain anyway? Just go with, ‘There was a time when I would have told you that Westin St. James was the start and the end of my world. That I loved him. That he would protect me always.’ No I couldn’t say that. Besides, that girl was a fool. I was no longer a fool.
"Let's just say it's a long, complicated story. We grew up together."
Jamila grinned and sat up, then snatched the bowl of popcorn from my lap. "Oh my God, I knew it. I knew it. That tension that I saw in the kitchen that day, it's unparalleled. And the fact that you guys are running around trying to one-up each other, it is every enemies-to-lovers romance come to life. Tell me everything."
I rolled my eyes. "You know what, like I said, there's nothing to tell. I don't want to get into it. That was so long ago."
"Uh-huh, sure. Spill." Jamila was not buying it.
And she shouldn't buy it because even though it was a long time ago, you are still holding on to the anger.
I was. I had a right to be angry. He’d promised to love me. But then he walked away. And I hadn't seen him again up until he walked into my father's house as if nothing had happened.
I worked my hand as I remembered hitting him straight in the face.
Nothing had felt quite so satisfying in years.
"Look, Nissa, I get it. You’ve got your walls up. You're trying to pretend that this doesn't faze you. You're doing that thing that you do where you erect a shell around yourself. It's not a cement shell, because it's permeable in places. You're empathetic, and sweet, and kind, and people love you. But when it comes to your heart, dear God. And this is me, your bestie. I love you. And I'm watching you as you erect this structure around your heart when it comes to him, so something has to be going on."
I knew Jamila. She wasn’t going to let this go. I lowered my voice in case he was listening outside the door. "He was my first."
Jamila caught the direction of my gaze and whipped around to stare at the door, and she, being the bestie that she was, lowered her voice too. But that did not stop her from mouthing, "Oh. My. God."
I placed a finger against my lips telling her to shush. "It's not a big deal. It was years ago."
"And here I thought that you were a prude."
"Well, that's a fair assessment. I won't touch just any dick."
"But apparently, you will touch bodyguard dick."
"No, I will not. Not ever again."
"Oh no, was he terrible?" She scowled at the door, shoving off her blankets. "Did he hurt you?"
I knew Jamila. She would march straight over there and jump on him if she thought he hurt me in any way.
"No, he didn't hurt me. It was actually…" my voice trailed off as I try to think of the right word. "It was exactly what it should have been. All the stuff you see in movies and read about in books. It was perfect. And then in the morning, he was gone, and I never saw him again."
Jamila's mouth fell open. "What?"
"Yeah."
"No, there's no way." She shook her head, clearly in denial.
"I'm telling you, Jamila, that's what happened. He just walked away from me as if I never mattered. And now he's back, working for my dad, yet again."
"Fucking hell, Nissa, I'm so sorry."
"Yeah, so you see why I'm less than pleased."
