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My childhood home is a rotten shadow of what it used to be.
“Roger that.” I lock my arm around Ezra’s, grabbing Kai’s hand with my other as I step forward. I start the movements, but then quickly step back and allow them to lead me. God forbid I stumble over the now cracked and overgrown sidewalks.
“Let’s bypass the rest of the house and go straight to the basement.” Nic, once more, decides to take charge and give orders. Instead of fighting him on it out of principle, I just agree.
It’s a good idea seeing as he probably has a better idea on the state of the house than me. Plus, anything of value to my dad is probably in his basement. Not even my mother would disrespect his memory by going through his shit or messing it up. If we have a chance at finding anything, it’ll be down there.
Even if it’s kind of the last place I want to be in the world right now.
“When we were here last, it looked like most things of value were taken, but not everything. It was almost like after it went into foreclosure, whoever got it just let it sit and rot, so I imagine most of the items that are missing, like the furniture and things like that, were taken by looters.” Kai speaks softly to me as we make our way through the unlocked front door and into the house, Gizmo and Snitch staying oddly quiet and close, as if they are picking up on the weight of the situation; where we’re at, what we’re doing, what it means.
I try to imagine what Kai’s seeing as he speaks, but I can’t. I can only see my house from my memories, when it was in its prime. I almost don’t even want to see what it’s become anyways. I think that would be too much for me to witness the place that once held so many happy moments from my life with my dad, now reduced to shit. It would taint them, and I don’t want anything to taint the few pieces of my dad I have left.
I tighten my hold on Ezra and Kai as we round the corner I know leads to the basement door, jumping only slightly when it creaks as someone opens it, the insignificant sound loud and threatening in the relative quiet of the house. The wind assaulting the siding of the house seems to filter through the cracks and holes, giving an ominous soundtrack to the moment as we start to walk down the stairs.
Ezra goes first, letting me hold onto his shirt as he slows his pace to match mine while I make my way down. Kai, who stays close behind me, keeps his hands on my waist in a steady and supportive grip. Strong enough that I know he would be able to catch me if I tripped. Nic trails behind us with Gizmo and Snitch, his aura on edge, focused sharply on every noise and movement around us.
We round another corner as we reach the bottom, and I step forward just enough to move out of the way of those behind me before stopping. Standing in place, I wring my hands together before shoving them in my pockets altogether.
It’s moments like this that I feel useless. Unless there’s something in here that holds astrongemotional attachment from my dad, I’ll get nothing. Over time, emotions imprinted on items fade.
It’s like looking through a set of thermal imaging binoculars. When someone touches an object, the heat from their hand can stick around on its surface for a short time before fading away completely. Emotions on objects are like that, though they don’t fade as quickly as heat, but they do fade eventually.
That’s the only reason I don’t tend to offer my services on cold cases. It takes an awful amount of emotional imprinting for me to pick up anything years after the fact.
So, here I stand as the guys start to move forward and explore, twiddling my fingers and bouncing in place to ward off the cold. Utterly and completely useless.
“This all seems like junk to me.” Nic speaks as a large object scrapes against something before dropping with a bang.
My heart deflates at his words, not realizing just how much I was hoping we would find something here. I don’t know why, I can’t quite explain it, but I felt pulled back here. Even if I had no good rational reason, it feltright. Now…I feel stupid.
“Well then-” I cut off, something clicking into place inside of me. A weird, foreign feeling that has me turning in Kai’s direction mere seconds before he speaks.
“Hey! Did your dad have a girlfriend before your mom?” My brow crinkles at his question, and I start shaking my head far before finding my voice.
“What? No. They were high school sweethearts. I’m pretty sure they’d been dating since he was a sophomore and she was a freshman. Why?” I follow the direction of aura, whistling so Gizmo and Snitch run in front of me and give me pulses of objects to avoid on my path.
“Well, this picture…I don’t know. I don’t think that’s your mom. Unless she used to dye her hair blonde?”
“No. Mom hates blondes, always saying thatif you want a man to look at you like an airhead, be a blonde, but if you want to be taken seriously, be a brunette. She’s such a bitch.” I snort, crossing my arms over my chest as I reach him.
“What’s happening in the picture?”
“Well…I’m pretty sure your dad is kissing the blonde woman,” Kai’s voice is low, his aura filled with caution. Ezra and Nic join us where we’re standing and I reach forward, finding his hand holding the picture, snatching it away.
“That’s not possible! Are you sure it’s my dad? Have you evenseenhim before?” I snap, my heart banging violently against my ribs as my stomach bottoms out.
Someone snatches the picture out of my hand and I grab uselessly at the air before giving up. It’s not like I can fucking see it anyways.
“This is definitely your dad. His picture was all over the files on your accident, and in the papers. There’s no mistaking anyone else. He’s even close to the same age as he was when he…well, you know.” Nic finally voices, probably after examining the photo himself. My eyes start to burn, though I don’t know if it’s because I’m frustrated at not being able to see it myself, or if part of me actually believes my dad could have cheated on my mom.
He wasn’t that kind of guy. He stuck with her through everything, loyal to a fucking fault. Even when I begged him to break it off with her and take me away, he never did. He loved her and refused to leave her, even if she didn’t deserve it. He never would have had an affair. He wouldn’t have betrayed her like that. That’s not who he was.
“Who’s the woman? Are you sure it’s not my mom?” My voice cracks as surely as the beating vessel in my chest forms its own.
“It’s not your mom. I can’t see much of her face because of the angle of the camera and them kissing, but it’s definitely not your mom. The jawline is very different.” Nic’s voice is almost soft, his aura sympathetic and sorrowful. As if he too is disappointed in the actions of my father.
“He wouldn’t do that to her. He loved her. That’s not my dad!” I practically screech, my hands shaking so hard I have to tighten them into fists before someone sees. I back away from both Kai and Nic, the traitors that they are, my back slamming into another form. Turning to Ezra, I angle my face up to him, hope blooming in my chest. I grab his arm tightly, my nails almost digging into his skin, but I can’t seem to stop myself. “Tell them, Ezra. Tell them it’s not him. He wouldn’t do that. He was a good man. The best! Tell them!”
