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I’m supposed to protect her! I promised I would. I failed. I failed. I failed.
It’s all my fault. All of it.
She deserves more than she has in me. Oh, God. What have I done?
Grabbing the closest thing to me, I slam it into the mirror in front of me. The cracks spiderweb, slicing through my reflection, distorting my perception of myself.
I’m lost.
No. Not lost.
I know what needs to happen now. It’s as clear to me as each act of retribution always has been.
I deserve this.
She will have vengeance. She will be protected.
She has to do it.
It’s the only way.
27
“Jesus fucking Christ! It was just a graze!” I quickly swat all six hands away as they continue to try to hem and haw at me for the thousandth time.
“It wasn’tjusta graze, Wicked! You were knocked out. You’re still getting over a concussion. It’s like you’re trying to get yourself killed!” I wince at the fury in Kai’s tone, my jokester wiped of all positivity and humor.
“And I’ve already told you, the bullet didn’t knock me out. All my scans were fine! I passed out from over-exerting my gift again. They barely had to stitch the wound, alright? I’mfine.” A chorus of exasperated groans surface around me and I let out a sigh before softening my tone. “Look, I’m sorry I scared you guys. Truly, I am. Headwounds just bleed a lot. But I had to do it. I knew everything would be okay. Iknew.”
Kai and Ezra stay silent while Nic lets out a huff, but I’ll call it a win. He’s just mad his ass got saved by a girl. “Listen to me, okay? You guys are always so adamant that I need to open up and learn to trust you guys, and Ihave. But at some point, you guys need to learn to trust in me too. I haven’t gotten this far off of luck. I am sort of a badass, remember?”
“We’re supposed to be protectingyou, not the other way around. Do you know what losing you would do to us?” Nic’s voice is thick with the remnants of the grief he experienced when he thought I was dying. His aura simmers with pain and relief, each caustic emotion coalescing into a cocktail of trauma threatening to boil over.
“If you think for one second that I’m going to lie down and let any of you guys leave me, then you don’t know me very well at all! You asked for me to let you in, well here we are! This is what you get! And if you have a problem with that, then- Then- Then, well, you’re going to have to learn to live with it! Because you’re not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me now!” I cross my arms over my chest, daring them to fight me on this.
They’ll lose. I’m stubborn as a fucking mule. I’d stick to my guns like super glue if Alan would let me fucking have one.
“Guys, give us the room. Make sure no one comes in.” Nic’s tone brooks no argument and I freeze, wondering what verbal lashing I’m in for as Kai and Ezra both leave without question.
“Cool trick, dick. How’d you get them trained so quickly?”
“I earned it.”
“How?”
“Stop trying to stall, Izabella.” Great, he called me Izabella. I’m in for it now.
“Fine. Say what you’re going to say. I make no promises on the outcome.” I take that moment to collapse on the shitty hospital bed I was trying to leave only moments ago, laying out with my arms behind my head like I have no cares in the world.
Inside though? I’m a mess. This entire day has been a rollercoaster of emotions and bullshit and I’m exhausted. I need to sleep for like a week after this.
My jokester is all serious and sad, a darkness settling over him that is terrifyingly close to what he experienced when he lost his sister. My unphased giant went all Hulk-smash on an entire street, cutting his usually unwavering and calming hands to shreds. And my asshole has been…destroyed. He’s not nearly as calculating and explosively angry, like he has no fight left in him. I hate that I scared them so much and I have no idea how to fix this.
Especially because I don’t actually regret it. I know what I did was right.
“Mi vida…” I grimace as he starts his words softly and so full of love, it shreds my carefully crafted justification to pieces right out of the gate. Fuck. “I need you to read me.”
Well, that’s not what I was expecting.
