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Noelle spoke under her breath. “Yeah.”
“Okay.” I forced a smile.
As we walked back to the house in silence, I sensed this conversation was far from over.
CHAPTER 11
NOELLE
PAST
AFTER MY CONVERSATION with Archie this morning, I had to talk to someone, so I’d called my friend Ashley to fill her in. I’d just finished telling her how I’d made a mess of my relationship with him. Running a hand through my hair, I paced. “I can’t believe I blurted that out last night.”
“Well, you could’ve told him you didn’t remember saying it. Why were you so honest the next day?”
“I guess I still wanted him to consider it.” I covered my face. “What the hell is wrong with me?”
“You’re horny and hot for him, and you don’t know what to do about it.”
“Yeah, but shouldn’t our friendship matter more to me than wanting to have sex with him? I don’t want him to think I was trying to use him. I just wanted the experience—with him. Even if nothing more came of it. But I still shouldn’t have said anything.”
“Well, you did. You can’t take it back. So own it. Don’t avoid him. Just try to work your way back to how things were without doing anything else to make the situation weird.”
“Yeah. I plan to try. Summer is half over. I don’t want to waste this precious time. He really does mean a lot to me. I’m just afraid I ruined everything.”
“Here’s an idea,” she said. “Maybe try to focus on something else for a little while.”
“Like what?”
“It sounds like you started the summer hanging out with all these different people—until you became obsessed with Archie. You need a breather, I think. Go flirt with someone else.”
Maybe she was right. I needed to break the cycle.
• • •
That night, I headed down to the beach alone—without checking in with Archie first. I’d had to force myself to act in a way that went against what I really wanted. Although avoiding him wasn’t difficult after the awkwardness of this morning. A break is necessary, I told myself.
Even though nothing had been happening between James and me, I made a point to go right to him at the beach, immersing myself in conversation. I tried to be interested in everything he had to say. And when Archie showed up later, I didn’t look in his direction even once. It’s for the best, I told myself.
At one point, James asked if I wanted to take a walk. We were just starting down the beach when Archie’s voice came from behind us.
“Noelle, I need to talk to you for a minute.”
I turned and cleared my throat. “I was just taking a walk with James.”
“I get that. But I need to talk to you first.”
“Okay.” I shrugged and looked at James. “Do you mind?”
“No.” James turned to Archie and lifted a brow. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah. I just need to talk to her about something. In private,” he added.
“Okay, man.” James turned to me. “I’ll be over by the clam shack when you’re done.”
I smiled. “I’ll come find you.”
As Archie and I took off down the beach, he was silent. The soothing sound of the ocean waves massaged some of the tension in the air.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
“What are you doing?” he demanded. “You’re not even into him, and you know it.”
Surprised by his tone, I said, “How do you know that?”
“Because you’re into me right now. You’re throwing yourself at him to spite me because I shot you down.”
“Mighty confident in ourselves, are we?”
He shut his eyes. “Alright, look, that wasn’t the way I wanted to approach things. Even if it’s fucking true.” Archie sighed. “That came out all cocky, and that wasn’t my intent.”
“Oh really? Because I’m pretty sure you’re a cocky fucking bastard when you want to be,” I quipped.
He ran his hand through his hair. “Noelle…”
I tilted my head. “What did you need to speak to me about?”
“I have a preposition for you…”
“A preposition? Like in or under…or over?”
He shook his head and gritted his teeth. “Fuck. I’m nervous, alright? I obviously meant proposition.”
He’s nervous? “Oh.” I laughed. “That’s definitely more exciting than a preposition.”
Archie rolled his eyes. “I’ve been thinking about our talk this morning.”
I got goose bumps. “Okay…”
“You’ve done so much for me this summer. I want to pay you back in probably the only way I know how. I’m not good for much. But I’m definitely good for what you need.”
“This is the spin you’re putting on things now? I don’t want to be a mercy fuck, Archie. Jesus!”
“You wouldn’t be.” He placed his palm on my shoulder, causing my nipples to stiffen. “It’s a two-way street, Noelle.” Archie removed his hand. “Look, I’ve been turned on thinking about showing you things. I don’t know that taking your virginity is a good idea, but I’d love to at least…explore things with you. Even if we don’t have sex.”
