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Nathan
Ihighly doubted when my therapist suggested to tackle my problems head-on, that she meant literally. Though there was something therapeutic about smashing Robbie into the ground, I was sure she would disapprove. Regardless, it felt great beating the shit out of him in that parking lot. He seemed like the kind of guy who would have a face routine, really uppity with lots of creams and cleansers. It probably would explain why my hands feel softer after punching his delicate face. I just wished Julia hadn’t seen it, hadn’t left with him.
What was the control he had over Julia anyway? Was it really because of money? The penthouse, the job? Was that why she left me? I didn’t know how I could ever compete. I supposed I could get her a job within town, writing for the Banjo Bulletin, what a dream. Still, I could tell the truth behind her eyes. She was unhappy. Hell, I was unhappy. Unhappy over the fact that she’d never be mine. She couldn’t be mine. I was a disheveled drunk who didn’t deserve Julia.
I knew I wasn’t going to get any answers, or at least any that I wanted to hear. I remembered this feeling just like before, back when I lost love again. It was easy to crawl back, visiting an old memory, an old habit. Jane was always on speed dial in case I needed her, but I guess it was no good if I choose to delete it, as I did now. Truth was I never even thought about having a drink, not even a sip, until this afternoon.
I didn’t think the bartender would have given me my fifth beer had I told him that today was actually my fourteenth month of being sober. It felt only fitting to break my good streak here, at The Rustic Moon, back where I met Julia. It felt good to hear the jukebox play and the crack of the pool balls being broken. I could just sip all night, closing my eyes, remembering the sounds that surrounded us in our first kiss.
I just sat there, wearing my formal attire for the charity ball. I looked like a magician who just got laid off. What a fucking sap.
My phone buzzed in my pocket. It was Willie calling.
“I know, I know.” I answered.
“You’re not home? I thought Eve and I were going to pick you up for the ball?” His annoyed tone was really not what I needed right now, as I drowned my sorrows with Jack.
“Turns out I’ll be riding with my good friend Uber,” I slurred. “If I even go.”
“Are you drinking? Where the fuck you at man? I’ll pick you up. You’re not supposed to be drinking.” Willie scolded.
“Don’t worry about me, buddy. Hang out with your lady friend.” I dismissed him, waving my hand, but instead the bartender saw me and shook his head.
“Not a chance. I know where you’re at anyway…” Willie paused, and it sounded like he was chatting with Eve, in the distance, about something, but I couldn’t make out what they were saying. “Sorry man, Eve’s chewing my head off cause we’re late. I’m ordering you that Uber now. So be ready.” He disconnected the call before I had the chance to tell him his balls were in Eve’s purse. Shortly after a text came through, your ride will arrive in five minutes.
Great, I could at least chug another beer in. I signaled for another round, preparing my liver for a night of obnoxious couples and dancing.
By the time I was dropped off, I couldn’t tell if it was crowded or if I was just seeing double. I had to act cool, walk straight and find a chair. I was certain no one could tell I’d been drinking, or at least I thought so. My goal was to get in, get credit for attending, and to bail. Simple enough.
I slipped in unnoticed and sat down at one of the tables furthest away from the front stage. The DJ’s obsessive need to fist bump made me nauseous. At this point, I was glad I missed last year’s event, having convinced the chief at that time that I was not in the right mindset to celebrate. I should have told him that his daughter broke my heart and that I was unable to go this year either. He would have loved that.
I was grateful that the open bar was around the corner, just out of Willie’s view. Grabbing a drink was too easy, especially with the crowd so mesmerized. The music drowned out my steps, I was merely a shadow in the backdrop, but something caught my eye.
Everyone was so excited, watching the spinning girls waltz in the middle of the room. I was certain that I could see Eve’s bouncing blond curls, but spectators continued to block my view. It was odd actually, all of us standing in a circle, almost like a cult. I wanted to walk away, but then I saw it. Her face in the crowded room, like a sobering thunderbolt.
It was Julia, or maybe I’d finally gone crazy. I squinted, determined to focus my sight, to absorb the reality that was before me. I stood still, abstaining my steps to the bar, tantalized by my urge to approach her. I knew better, how awkward it would be to walk in the middle of an open dance floor. Instead, I watched.
She looked incredible, her gown twirling along the floor with each step. I wished it was me dancing with her, holding her close. By the look of her face, it looked like she would agree. Her face seemed stern, yet she would flash a smile to the crowd. Something felt off, and I never expected her to be here, especially not after what happened earlier today. I could see the chief standing by closely, and it might have been the first time I had ever seen him smile. I never knew his mouth could do that.
My buzzing head was dulled at the sight of Robbie sitting at a nearby table. I could tell he tried to cover his lip with a little color. You could still spot it a mile away. What a fucking creep. Julia or not, this man has crossed me one too many times. It was personal.
I shifted to go up closer to get a better look, but Robbie spotted me. The smug bastard flashed a smirk, so I flashed one back.
By the time my boastful obstacle walked confidently toward me, I nodded him over into an empty hallway, which was far away from the crowd.
“Not surprised to see you here.” He scoffed. “You stalking my girl?” Robbie asked, the smirk didn’t leave his dumb fucking face.
“Not quite. I work here. Nice lip, just get it done?” His expression was taken aback. It looked like he wanted to hit me, but he knew better.
He narrowed his eyes, holding back a muffled chuckle; this must have been pretty amusing to him. “So, Mike is your boss, huh? Does he know you fucked his daughter? Maybe we should go tell him?”
This really pissed me off, but I didn’t show it. He was bluffing, I could tell. Besides, he didn’t know that I was willing to lose it all for Julia, or even for the sake of making him beg for mercy. As I opened my mouth to speak, he threw his finger up, waving it as if he had a brilliant idea.
“Oh, by the way, you’ll be thinking of me long after I’m gone, especially while you’re at work.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” I laughed at his impossible threat. I figured he was joking, but I was the one with the punchline. I stared at his face, looming over him, deciding if his eyes could use a little more shadow.
“They haven’t announced it yet, but I donated a handsome amount to this firehouse.” Robbie began, his eyebrows raised confidently. His hands were tucked in his pockets. He stood straighter as he talked. “The plaque they’ll put up will have my name written over it. After every life you save, every time you step into this house, you’ll be reminded of me.” Robbie announced with a grating tone, a grin hanging on his lip. “This actually kills two birds with one stone, because both you and Mike can suck my cock.” He scoffed and took a step closer, his face close to mine as he whispered the unthinkable. “Want to know the best part?”
