AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Julia
My mind was blank. Nothing seemed to faze me, as I moved in an unblinking trance. Robbie and I made it back to the house, leaving us alone as Dad salvaged what was left of the event. We remained quiet; the silence challenged only by the ticking clock on the wall.
Robbie laid on the couch as I brought him a bag of ice. His blood dripped on my dress, though I didn’t care. I was somewhere else, lost, stuck in the final words of Nathan. They shot through me, his words now alive, breathing as living things do. I had to tend to them, providing their only means of survival, the endless replaying of their existence.
‘I love you.’Again and again, the words rang in my head. I was scared of how they made me feel, but scared of another truth; could I trust him, truly? A drunk maybe, but violent too? Robbie’s face was a stinging testament to his power. What else has he alluded to, if anything? Could I ever untangle the mess, mine included, all the fires started from our burning little secrets?
“Ouch, Julia. Fuck.” Robbie cried out as gently as possible, concealing his pain.
“Sorry,” I said with little to no empathy. Shit, I didn’t realize my own pressure, holding down a bag of ice on Robbie’s busted lip.
“Fuck that guy. I can't believe you, sneaking around with that prick.” Robbie’s agitation reemerged as he cursed under his breath.
“I thought we were past that, Robbie. We forgave one another, remember? Your words, not mine.” I nodded, my stern stare sat in place of words. How easy would it be to remind him; how he fucked my friend and got her pregnant.
“You think I can forget this?” He pointed at his face. His eyes grew puffy, plump like a rotten plumb. “You’re fucking crazy if you think I could ever forgive you now. This is all your fault. How can I show my face back at work when I look like a fool?
“I swear I didn’t know he’d be there,” I yelled out in Dad’s empty house. “You really think I would go out of my way to plot this against you?”
“Yes,” he stated so sternly. “Ow, Julia!” he said annoyed as I placed pressure on his face with the ice pack, this time on purpose.
“Sorry… again.” I tightened my lips shut to keep them from saying anything more. There he was. The old Robbie. Still eager to tear apart my words with his accusations. His delusions were as twisted as his now-broken face. I felt like a fool before, but now I felt stupid. To think he could change after his little act, what an idiot.
I made sure he was comfortable, propping him up with pillows as I turned on his favorite show.
Realistically, I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs, to flee from Robbie, at all costs. Quickly, I snuck away to my room, immediately locking myself inside. I needed new air, taking a deep breath in a space devoid of Robbie’s presence.
And then I thought of what Nathan said earlier; you deserve to be free from all of this. Don’t let him be in control of your dreams.
Nathan wasn’t wrong. I knew this. I wanted to pull my hair out over living the lie that tortured me day and night. I knew my life was a fucking fantasy. I knew Robbie would never change. If only I had the courage to speak it, to go through with the risk, to lose it all in order to win it back, on my terms and my hard work alone. My thoughts raced, distracted only at the sound of Robbie coming up the stairs.
“Open the door, Julia.” I could hear his annoyed voice between the knocking. It became impossible to be alone, to breathe. He pounded harder and harder, a personified migraine to haunt my life.
“I’m not happy,” the words slipped out of my mouth quietly, unbeknownst to the monster outside. Suddenly, I jumped, startled at the crashing door that Robbie kicked open. Quickly he rushed inside, lifting me up by my arm.
“And to think I flew all the way down here to prove how much I love you. The entire time I’ve been here you have ditched me and left me with your father… who, by the way, hates my fucking guts.” His anger flared to a point that scared me. I’d never seen him lose control over his temper. Not like this. His head shook violently, his fingers brushed through his hair with angry swipes.
This was my moment to speak freely. It’s now or never, Julia, I told myself.
“You weren’t supposed to come down, this was meant to be a trip so that I could see my family. Fuck, Robbie, you make everything about yourself, and I’m god damn sick of your shit.” I stomped up to him, my finger jabbing at his chest. “Let me tell you something, this trip was to get away from you! You’re a soul sucker, a fucking vampire. I can’t breathe around you, let alone tend to your fragile insecurities. Take the hint you fucking psycho!”
I gasped, covering my mouth as the truth finally unfolded—in word vomit fashion. I inhaled deeply while Robbie looked angry as he paced back and forth, not taking a moment to catch my eyes.
Slam! Robbie punched the shit out of my poor little heater—a constant victim of his relentless beatings throughout the trip. “I’ve given you everything, you know that? Anything you have wanted, and this is how you repay me? You leave me, to not even see your family, but to cheat on me. I’ve always known you did that behind my back.” He yelled, puffing his chest.
“You’re wrong,” I pointed at him, my finger shaking with adrenaline. “You’ve always been wrong. I’d never done anything behind your back until this trip. And yeah, it doesn’t sound great, but you know what, you lost me the day you lied to me and slept with my best friend. Which means our entire relationship has been a fucking lie. And to think, these last few months I’ve been lying to myself about my happiness with you, but the truth is, I’ve been so miserable with you, and I didn’t realize it until now. I’ve opened my eyes because of Nathan. He’s truly compassionate, empathetic, a real man unlike you. Someone who actually gives a shit about me.”
By this point, Robbie interlaced his fingers behind his head, leaning over to catch his breath. “You mean the drunk?” He laughed out loud, tilting his head up sarcastically. “The guy who got fucking fired—by your dad. The guy who did this.” He pointed at his beaten face, “This!” Robbie shouted, reaching out with a stinging slap. The sound was loud, yet I stood unwavering against his contact. I could feel my cheek glowing with heat, but all I could do was glare.
“Look at you. So fucking tough. You never stood a chance against Nathan. You’re too soft.” I wiped my nose, removing a dot of blood. “Now get the fuck out of my house. We’re over.” The smell of iron whisked in my senses, yet I felt no pain.
“You’ll never make it without me. I made you who you are. I own you! I own everything.”
He held his hand out motioning for my phone. He wouldn’t dare, would he? Would he really strip me of all of the items he once purchased? So low, so petty.
“Take it, call yourself a plastic surgeon. You look like a fucking wreck.” I tossed the phone at his chest, but he couldn’t even catch it. My whole life was in that phone, though the pain of its loss was worth it as he scrambled to hurt me. His control was slipping; he had no power without compliance. “Now get the fuck out, before my dad comes back to finish the job that Nathan started.” The threat was real, and his eyes widened with its possibility.
“With pleasure, just remember… when you come crawling back, I won’t be so kind. I’ll make you beg for my forgiveness. Once I’m out the door, we are over. Kiss your career away and your precious city goodbye.” Robbie stated with a growing smirk. Ugh, he was so smug.
