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She grazed my cheek with her hand, stroking it sweetly. I’d been waiting for a moment alone with her, to find the right words to say once again.
“No, I apologize. I’ve made plenty of mistakes, but none of them have been you, Nathan. You’ve given me more than life, you’ve given me the courage to be someone new, to be brave. To leave Robbie once and for all.” She said this softly, but I lifted her chin up, seeing the beautiful green of her glossy eyes. “Nathan, I don’t judge you for your past. I’ve seen you, the real you. The things that have happened, those are your experiences, your struggles, but that doesn’t define the beautiful man that I’ve come to know.”
All I wanted to do was kiss her. I nodded, resting my hand on hers, squeezing it softly. For once I would let fate take me where she wished. I told her my truth, I showed her my love and the whole world knew it. All I could do now was let her do with it as she pleased.
“Are you for sure going back to New York?”
She took a sip of water, swallowing hard, almost as if she was contemplating her answer. “I can’t help but wonder ‘what if?’ What if I made it on my own, my own potential paving the way. I have no one to prove this to but myself, and it hurts.” Julia looked away, hiding her teary eyes. “But it doesn’t change how I feel about you… how I…” She stopped herself once again, her worried eyes distant. “I don’t want to say it, because then its real, and if its real, I’ll never be able to leave.” Her hand cupped in mine, softly squeezing, “Nathan, I’ll cherish you forever.”
I kissed her hands and nodded. “I understand, and I’ll never stop you from living your dreams. I’ll always support the things that make you happy, and that’s all that matters.” She smiled in relief, kissing me as I helped her off the bed.
Julia rummaged through her duffle, finding clothes to wear as I sat back down. She took a few pieces into the bathroom to change, leaving me alone in her room. I glanced beside me where her wallet laid open against her purse.
I pulled out the polaroid, the selfie she took of us with Winston’s tongue kissing her face. My heart skipped a beat seeing the photo that I hoped she’d enjoy. I heard the bathroom door creak open and quickly slid the polaroid inside her wallet.
“You look beautiful.”
“Seriously, jeans and a t-shirt?” She teased.
“You looked hot in the hospital gown too. You make anything look a million times better.” Right away she blushed and hid her sweet face from me, but I bridged the gap between us, hugging her tightly, even if it may be the last time I was able to hold her. The subtle coconut scent whisked around me as I held her against me, her hands wrapped behind my neck and as we locked eyes, we gave one another one last kiss. Our lips melting onto one another in our embrace. This was goodbye.
Outside the hospital, Chief waited for our arrival. He leaned against his truck, smiling as I carried Julia’s bag.
“Manning.” He waved me over as Julia sat in the back. “Can I have a second?”
“Yes, sir.” I stepped toward him, placing Julia’s bag in the back. He patted my shoulder, his lips tucked in embrace of his words.
“You dropped this the night of the fire.” He pulled out the blue velvet box, unclasping its lock to reveal my medal of valor. I was speechless, it meant everything, coming from a man I knew more as a father.
“Thanks, Chief, you don’t know what this means.”
“No, thank you. I owe you everything. You saved my daughter with the same courage you have continually showed our community.” He removed the medal from its box and reached forward to pin it on my coat. “It would be my honor to have you back with the station. That is, if you’re interested.”
“Absolutely, I’ll be there. Thank you.” I shook his hand, unable to conceal my smile that made me laugh.
I got in the back with Julia, mesmerized as I flashed her my medal with a sarcastic smugness. A second raspy cough sounded.
“Oh shit, I almost forgot your gift.”
“A gift? No way.” Her grand smile gleamed.
“Yeah, open it up.” I handed her the plastic bag I’d been carrying around.
It didn’t take long to see her expression as she pulled out the box within.
“You shouldn’t have, Nathan!” She squeaked.
“No strings attached. Figured you would need one before heading out.” In her hands she held a new phone, its rose gold shimmer glistening across her face.
“You’re the best,” she said, leaning in to kiss my cheek.
“And in case you need anything, my phone number’s in there. The guy at the store helped me set it up for you.”
She knew where I was, if not in her heart, then in her phone. I was a line for help, her personal hero she could call at any time.
23
Julia
