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He responded right away.
Holden: Why? Did she say something?
Lala: She ran into my mom at the supermarket, and they sort of talked in code until they both acknowledged that they knew we were dating.
Holden: I don’t open up to my mom much. Only about the most important stuff.
My heart fluttered. I beamed and typed.
Lala: Got it.
The little dots moved around for a while before he sent another message.
Holden: Lala…I don’t know if I can do this.
My heart sank to my stomach, and a rush of heat shot straight to my head. Do what? Is he breaking up with me?
Holden: I can’t go too long without seeing you.
I took a deep breath. If my near heart attack wasn’t an indication of my true feelings, I didn’t know what was.
CHAPTER 31
Holden
Owen looked me up and down when he opened the door. “Rough night?”
“Rough sixteen nights.” I couldn’t believe it had been that long, and I still hadn’t seen Lala.
The card table was set up in the middle of the living room for our monthly poker game. Colby took a beer out of the cardboard box he was unloading into the mini fridge and chucked it to me. “You look like balls, dude.”
I frowned. “Thanks.”
He shrugged. “Actually you look worse than balls. My sack is looking pretty spiffy these days. Billie told me I needed to do a tidy-up down there. When I didn’t get around to it fast enough for her, she told me she wanted ice cream and then shoved me into the waxing place next door to the ice cream parlor for grooming while she ate her cone. She’d booked me an appointment for a bro-zillian.”
“A bro-zillian?” Owen covered his junk over his pants. “Like, someone poured hot wax on your balls and ripped it off?”
“It actually wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I kinda liked the hot wax part. It was warm and nice, like having your balls cupped in two soft hands. The skin-ripping part, I could’ve done without.”
I shook my head. “How did this conversation take a turn so fast?”
Colby stood and cracked a beer with a loud tssSSS kr-POP. He pointed at me as he lowered the can. “Your face looks worse than my pretty balls.”
Brayden strolled in from the kitchen. He looked between me and Colby and held his hands up. “I’ll take your word for it.”
I chuckled. It might’ve been the first time that had happened in more than two weeks. I think I needed this. The guys took their usual seats around the table, and Brayden doled out the chips in exchange for cash.
When he got to me, he lifted his chin. “So why do Colby’s balls look better than your face? Or do I want to know?”
I sighed. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
He shrugged. “Fine with me. Now give me your fifty for the chips so I can start dealing.”
I pulled my wallet from my back pocket and tossed the cash on the table. Brayden added it to the empty coffee can that we kept the chips in and dealt the first hand. I went through the motions, tossing a chip into the center of the table and picking up my cards. But I couldn’t have told you what suits or numbers I had in my hand to save my life. I guess I also got lost in thought while the guys were making bets and taking cards because suddenly, a chip hit me in the face.
I rubbed my nose. “What the fuck?”
“You want any cards or not, pretty boy?” Brayden asked.
“Yeah.” I looked down at my hand, but I couldn’t concentrate enough to make a decision. “Actually, no. I’m good.”
Owen was seated to my left. He tipped his chair back on its hind legs and snuck a peek at my cards.
“You got nothing, shit for brains,” he said. “Take some damn cards.”
I studied my hand once again and nodded. But still couldn’t make a decision.
So I gave in and shook my head. “I’m in love with Lala. I think I fucked up.”
Brayden tossed his cards into the air and groaned. “Oh fuck me.”
Owen frowned. “What the hell did you do?”
Colby blew out a jagged breath. “I’m really going to hate fucking up your pretty face. Did you cheat on her?”
I held up two hands. “No, nothing like that. I meant I fucked up by encouraging her to leave. I should’ve never pushed her to go.”
“Wait. Let me get this straight,” Brayden said. “It wasn’t Lala’s decision to go back to Philly? You made her leave early?”
“Maybe made her leave is too strong. But I told her I thought she should go back. I sure as hell didn’t do anything to stop her.”
“Why the fuck would you do that if you’re in love with her?”
I rubbed the back of my neck. “Because I’m an idiot?”
