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A few of my personal and work elements came tumbling down on my bed. One object in particular caught my attention as Ines sauntered out with the empty tote. An envelope.
You read the letter yet?His deep cords replayed in my mind as though he spoke the words over my head.
My pulse began to race instantly and my hands shook as I opened the envelope.
“You still there?” Sergio asked.
I blinked hard several times, realizing I’d forgotten my own damn name in those few seconds. “Ye—yeah. I’m here. Ines—” A chirp of laughter shot through my throat from my belly at the first three lines.
Greetings queen from the most high.
I pray you out there maintaining…earning your crown every day. I pray you out there balancing ya chakras enjoying that free flow of life energy. I know the sun kisses you awake every morning. And the moon tucks you in at night.
Me? I’m in here maintaining, tryna elevate. I’m grabbing all the knowledge I can. I can’t wait to build with you again. Can’t wait to be outside this gate. My visions of holding ya and strolling through the park is what’s keeping my head. Me proving to you I’m a worthy king of your queendom be having me chill when niggaz wanna pop off in here.
Hope you good at ya pops job. Better days are ahead of you shortie. You gone have ya own as soon as I drop. I ain’t rich but I gotta lotta luv 4 you. I may have to bruise my hands working hard to take care of you. Even if the house come years down the road, when I break free I’mma damn sure make you a home. No amount of years is gonna keep me from those promises.
In the meantime, keep ya head above the struggle. Don’t let negativity consume you. Don’t let people talkin shit about us hurt you. I’mma do my bid and come home to you. Only you. Just wait on the kid.
PS I’mma wait on ya letter. Keep building with me.
Yours in truth light and life
Jas aka Sin
By the middle of the letter, I’d caught the flow of the scenario he’d created, the narrative of him being incarcerated and writing home to his girl. Me. My energy had dropped toward the end of Jas’ satire. He’d successfully painted a nightmare of separation by incarceration. A dilemma caused by a liberty revoked. No, Jas and I were not in a relationship. I wasn’t in love or even deep infatuation with him, or anything crazy like that. But we had connected over the past few months. He’d intrigued me enough to want to get to know him. To respect him.
“Hey,” Sergio demanded. “Where did you go?”
“I’m sorry.” I dropped my forehead into my palm. “I was reading something.”
“Is it funny?” Because you fell out, laughing just a few seconds ago. Now, I don’t hear shit but your heavy breathing.” He scoffed. “You reading one of those nasty ass books? The ones horny mothers read to get off?”
I could hardly make out his words. Abruptly, the embarrassment from last Saturday didn’t sting as much. I felt…silly for shutting down and not wanting to talk to Jas about just who in the hell he really was.
That sound crazy as hell. Life is a gift and add freedom to it, and it’s beautiful.
Those were the words Jas used the first time he had dinner here at my place. He was big on making the most of his freedom. Our reality was he was not incarcerated anymore. We were not unable to simply talk.
Maybe it’s time to…
“I know that clown’s trying to claw his way back.”
My eyes burst wide. “Who?”
“Austin.”
“Oh.” My lips twisted. I still hadn’t spoken to Austin. Last week, his mother contacted my father. I told him to tell her to tell her son, I’ll consider talking to him later this week. After the shit with Jas, I definitely have no energy for Austin. “Yeah. Well…”
I had to admit, at times like this, I wish I had the simplicity of having a boyfriend whose history I knew. Minus the cheating part, being with Austin was easy. The cheating and limited time together. Toward the end of our relationship, I didn’t relish that part. But now, without Austin, I felt the snakes were let loose. Sergio here who had never spent so much time with me on the phone when I was with Au was one example. And Jas, the guy whose sensual passion had my head and body going since our first kiss was another. He was also the guy whose legal name I didn’t know. Being in a relationship could have its safety features, closing you off to a world of…snakes.
Taking a deep breath, I scooted up the bed toward my pillows and reclined onto the headboard.
“Serge…” I sighed in comfort as I pulled my phone up to send a necessary text.
“Yeah?”
“What’s your boss’ name? Like… Who’s the actual owner ofClub Sin?” I tappedsendon the text and smiled toward the framed ceiling.
