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“What are your spiritual views, Haris.”
Momentarily, the enchanted grin faded from his smooth, hickory face. “As in religion?”
My neck twisted as I understood he wasn’t accurately processing the question. “If you observe it, that, too.”
He exhaled roughly through his nostrils while sitting up in his chair, eyes darting out into the restaurant's distance. “Well, my parents—back home in Nigeria—were raised in the Islamic faith. When they settled in London, my mother converted to Catholicism, and my father followed. I don’t think he really believes, but he follows the rituals.”
“Or he follows your mother.” I winked. “But you haven’t said what your beliefs are, Haris.”
He took another deep breath, brows lifting. “I…uhhh…” He cleared his throat. “I don’t subscribe to celestial matters. I’ve always believed there was a god in me, which has led me to this level of success I’ve reached. There’s a shitload more money out there to obtain, but I’ve got enough to be set for life. I didn’t need religion for that. Spirits are for guidance; I’ve done a good job guiding myself.” Haris shrugged.
That was when I’d gotten my answer.
“Then you may not be familiar with the Bible. I’ve been studying it for a little while now, feeling the need for balance and answers.”
“Has it been helpful?”
I didn’t know why, but Haris’ question felt mocking.
Forging ahead, decidedly ignoring that inkling, I shared, “Proverbs chapter one, verse five says, ‘a wise man will hear, and will increase learning; and a man of understanding shall attain unto wise counsels.’ To me, that means there is so much to unearth about the journey we’re traveling. There are even depths of myself I’m exploring.”
“Does this have anything to do with your views on marriage?”
“Yes and no. It has everything to do with how I measure the parameters of my world. It’s how I’ve been able to govern who and what enters and exits.” Finally, there was a flip in Haris’ eyes. The charm had been gone long enough for me to see his vulnerability and see authenticity in the man. My lower face spread horizontally, and eyes narrowed in quiet pleasure. “I believe I’m done with dinner.”
He leaped in his seat. “Of, course.” Eyes combing the room for the waiter.
His breaths were harsh, and his palms annoyingly misty. But that didn’t deter me from exploring his mouth without hesitation in the back seat of his sedan. Haris was okay-looking. His face was mild, body tall and slender. The man’s magic ingredient, for me, was his confidence. He exuded it. He wanted in my bed—let’s make that very clear—under the guise of marriage, and I didn’t mind. The attention felt amazing, which was strange for me. I’d never been short of a man vying for my attention. Even now, I set up guards in my DM and had Borys pose as my significant other when we were on the road often.
However, no one went out of their way to get my attention as Haris had. And quite frankly, I was fucking lonely. Being the sole breadwinner in my home as a single mom had been easy. Being away from my family was hard as fuck. For over two years, I’d avoided this feeling of loneliness. Neediness. That was until it had reached its peak recently.
And now, while, yeah, Haris’ arms felt foreign, his breathing heavily in my face, and his tongue too far outside of the parameters of my lips, I was fishing for chemistry to pounce on. I needed male companionship just for the night. I’d sort out the complications regarding it in the morning.
Just for tonight…
I reached for the waist of his pants, surprisingly detaching his belt with deft performance. His breathing increased unimaginably as I progressed into his loose boxers. Haris’ greedy hand reached the underside of my bare thigh, inching beneath the hem of myFendisheath dress. He’d eventually be headed for my panties, but I wasn’t ready for that…just yet. I still needed a spark of chemistry. I’d take it from there. With that, I’d show Haris the night of his life.
Just give me this…
My heart pounded as I made it to his bed of pubic hairs. Immediately, I felt like a trespasser. Hewasforeign! But Haris was an uncharted territory I needed the escape of. This…itwas all I needed to finally move to a new plateau as a woman and get this monkey off my back. And I was ready. Just for this night.
Shit…
My feverish body went cold instantly. The tips of my fingers met the bottom of my palm. Haris may have been lengthy in height, but his minor member was petite while fully erect. My shoulders fell against the leather seat. Slowly, my arm retracted, lifeless hand pulling from the strange man’s pants. Next, my tongue slowed then withdrew.
Haris pulled back in search of an answer. I wiped my mouth, now disgusted by his audacity to be so sloppy. For a while, I kept my eyes low, feeling completely deflated. It happened again. The time I thought I was ready to move on—awayfrom the definition of my femininity I’d known for four years—the opportunity evaporated in dramatic fashion before my eyes.
“Shi-Shi,” that accent was questioning. “my love, what’s wrong?”
I finally peered Haris in the eyes. My throat screamed as I offered lowly, “I’m sorry. It’s been a long day.”
In the dark of the car as his driver waited near the door to my villa, Haris’ jaw fell in incredulity.
My eyes rolled up to the clock on the nightstand.
1:52 am
Fuck. I had church in a few hours and was still awake as I lay on my side, one leg curled and the other straight. My one hand cupped the side of my face, and the other was balled against the mattress. Dick was halfway hard, mind still running with…shit. This was a mental and physical state I’d been enduring for months now—actually a couple of years, but it had been becoming far more fucking intense recently.
