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I’m thinking you’re going to break me into a million pieces, and I’m feeling like the floor is going to fall out from under me at any possible second.
“How long is the studio letting you work remotely?”
Her brows furrow. “We haven’t really talked about it, why?”
I shrug. “Just wondering how much longer you’re going to be here before you go back to your perfect new life.”
“That’s what this is about?” she asks. “Hayes, I’m here. Right here. Don’t you get that?”
“Yeah,” I huff. “I do. I also get that you have everything you’ve ever wanted back at your house with Nolan. The fun roommate you can go out partying with. The dream job. You’ve got it all.”
“No,” she tells me. “I don’t! Because you’re not there!”
“Maybe that’s it!” I shout. “Has it ever crossed your mind that maybe your life is so fucking great therebecauseI’m not in it? Face it, Laiken. You’re better off without me.”
She shakes her head. “Fuck that. I don’t believe that shit at all.”
“You don’t have to. The proof is right in front of your face.”
Turning around, she takes two steps away from me then stops. Her fingers lace into her hair and she tugs on it, groaning in frustration.
“Urgh! You’re so fucking…urgh!” She lets go and rests her hands on the counter. “I’m not going to stand here and listen to you insinuate that you’re bad for me! That’s bullshit, and you fucking know it!”
“Who knows. Maybe I do,” I say, sounding completely defeated. “Or maybe I’m just mentally preparing for the inevitable day that you leave again.”
“Then why don’t you just ask me to stay?” she yells.
“Because I don’t know if I want you to!”
It’s bullshit. A total fucking lie. Of course, I want her to stay. The thought of her leaving again makes me sick to my stomach. But I refuse to be blindsided again. It’s happened too many times already.
Better to expect the worst.
Laiken looks like I just stabbed her straight in the chest. We stare at each other, knowing we’re at a crossroads. She’d be smart to give up on me. I’m a lost cause. I know that. She’s destined to be some super successful songwriter, and I’m meant to just be the guy she wrote a couple love ballads about once upon a time.
The sound of my phone cuts through the silence, and I half expect to look down and find some cryptic threat from someone who doesn’t have the balls to say it to my face, but it’s only Mali.
Home from work. Bring Lai over whenever.
I look out the window, seeing the light fade into the darkness.
“It’s time to go,” I say without looking at her. “I’m dropping you off at Mali’s and then I have to meet Cam at the bar.”
But as I get up and start walking toward the door, I realize she’s not behind me. I turn around to find her right where I left her, her eyes filled with tears.
“I don’t want to lose you,” she nearly whispers.
It chips another piece right off my heart, but it’s fine.
I’m used to it.
I shrug dejectedly. “I didn’t want to lose you either.”
Spinning on my heels, I walk straight out the front door and go start my truck, because I don’t have time for this conversation.
I have to move a goddamn body…again.
There isnothing more baffling than the mood swings of Hayes Beckett Wilder. One minute he’s looking at me like I’m the greatest thing to ever walk the face of the earth, and the next, he’s cold enough to give me frostbite. It’s like how we started, but so much worse.
