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“Really? So what was it like then, huh?”
“Do you think you were the only one affected by Blake’s death?” he cries, the pure anguish in his eyes catching me off guard. “I loved him too, you know. He was like a little brother to me, and it fucking killed me when we lost him. It fucking tears me up inside that every year on his birthday, I am reminded of the fact that he’s not here to celebrate becoming another year older. And it rips me apart to see the woman I once thought of as a second mother become the drunken empty shell that she is now.”
“You don’t have to live with her,” I remind him.
“No,” he solemnly agrees. “But I did have to live with it. I was there with you through it all. You may think I’m a selfish bastard, but I was hurting too, and it all became too much. When—” He pauses, his throat bobbing as he swallows. “When I went to Hadley’s that day, she saw how down I was and I just… needed someone to talk to.”
Guilt seeps in as I take in his words. He was there for me through all of it. And I never once considered that he may have been struggling to cope with it too. I was so wrapped up in my own grief that I failed to notice he was grieving too.
“You should have said something to me. I would have understood, and if you felt you couldn’t talk to me, you could have gone to Eric. You didn’t need to go toher.”
“I know.” He nods. “I’ve fucked everything up so badly. I can’t tell you how sorry I am, and I want you to know that I’m finished with Hadley.”
“Why bother? It’s not like it would change anything between us.”
“I know it won’t, but I love you, and I won’t stand for anyone deliberately trying to hurt you. I trusted her with that information, and she used it against you. I’m done with her.”
I look away and run my fingers through my hair. The anger has tapered, but tension still lingers in the air. There is nothing more to say; what’s done is done. I’m angry, but I also can’t help feeling an overwhelming sense of loss when I look at him.
He was such a big part of my life for so long. Now all of a sudden, he is not.
As much as I don’t want to admit it, I do miss him, and part of me still loves him. It’s something I just can’t switch off, but there are some things you just can’t come back from.
“Well,” I sigh. “I have to go.”
“Okay,” he responds, casting his gaze downward as I turn around and walk away.
ChapterSixteen
AVA
What was a wonderful start to my day really turned to shit fast. I should have just stayed home today. Actually, that’s a ridiculous thought. That would mean I would have had to deal with my mother, which would be ten times worse. What I should have done is talk Mason into staying at the harbor and giving the real world a miss altogether.
After my conversation with Logan, any remaining energy I had left after the catfight with Hadley has now been depleted. I’m emotionally spent and would love nothing more than to curl up into a ball and sleep for the rest of the day.
I stomp through the library, hoping like hell I don’t find Lily sitting with Mason when I get to the sofa. She’s been showing up unannounced more often than not lately, and her presence makes things awkward as hell.
Mason said it’s because she doesn’t have many friends and gets lonely, but I’m not buying it. For someone who has no friends, she sure isn’t making an effort to make new ones.
Any attempts I have made to have a conversation with her have been blatantly ignored, and with the way she eye fucks Mason the whole time, it’s obvious why she is there, and I would love nothing more than to rip those damn eyeballs out of her head.
But bedroom eyes aside, the girl is either so socially inept that she doesn’t notice her presence isn’t wanted, or she just doesn’t give a shit. I’m going with the latter.
Once I getto the back of the library and spot Mason sittingaloneon the sofa quietly reading, my whole body buzzes with newfound energy. He really is a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day. Never in a million years did I think he would become so important to me. He has come charging into my life out of nowhere, fast and furious like a bright burst of light and painting my world in a different color. A color so vibrant that I’m starting to look at everything differently.
Breathing out the stagnant air I’ve been holding in my lungs all morning, I feel a sense of calm wash over me as I make my way over to him.
He peers up from his book and breaks out into a smile as I sit down next to him.
“Hello, Flower,” he says, closing his book and tucking it beside him
“Hey,” I say, leaning back against the sofa and allowing my body to melt into it. Closing my eyes, I take a moment just to enjoy the tranquility of my surroundings, the temptation to doze off into a peaceful slumber becoming more tempting by the minute.
Feeling Mason’s eyes on me causes my skin to prickle and knowing that I still haven’t explained to him what happened with Hadley, that tension I had managed to shake off a few minutes ago starts to bind itself around me again.
“Are you okay?” he asks, and I open my eyes, turning to look at him.
“I’m okay,” I respond with a finality that causes his brows to dip.
