Page 59 of Heart of Sin


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“Tasha, what have I told you? I’ll spend time with you anyway I can.”

She inhales a deep breath and nods. In her lap, she’s fidgeting with the strap of her clutch purse. “It’s hard figuring out where to even begin. I was going to tell you earlier when we were dancing, then I freaked myself out and ran off.”

“Very impressive disappearing skills. I looked over and you were gone.”

“That mess with Big D? Louis, it really had a chokehold on me. Financially and emotionally and a lot of other ways. It’s hard to explain, but with him suddenly gone… it was the first real time I was on my own. Without anybody trying to control me. But can you believe I was scared and upset? I missed him, because it was familiar. How fucked up is that?

“Earning money at the Dollhouse, in the VIP rooms? I can do that. It’s easy. But if I didn’t have to do it anymore, then I’d have to address all the other stuff,” she says. “Things I’ve been avoiding for years. I’m not good with feelings. I don’t know how to process any of that. I just knew I couldn’t be with you, because I’d be a nightmare.”

“Tasha, we could’ve worked on it together—”

“You didn’t deserve to be put through that. That was on me to work on. I would’ve hurt you. Probably dumped you. Then wanted you back. Then hurt you again. I would’ve pushed you away and lashed out and I didn’t want to be that person.”

I give a reluctant nod. “It would’ve been hard to see you like that.”

“I didn’t want to see me like that. So, I’ve been trying to do better. I’m seeing a therapist and I’m part of a program that advocates for women that have similar experiences to mine, who got into certain lifestyles due to circumstance, or were exploited underage. It’s a process, but I’m getting there.”

“Tasha, that’s amazing.” I don’t think before I’m leaning over and crushing my arms around her in a proud hug. I almost don’t want to let her go, though I eventually I do.

“It’s true what I said earlier. The last six months have been good. I’m enrolled in cosmetology school, and I was able to find a job as a receptionist at a hotel. It’s not much, but it’s a start. It’s the first time I feel like I’m really living my own life. I’ve been speaking to a lawyer about petitioning for custody of Zara. Now that I have a stable job and D’s gone…”

“I’ve got a lawyer friend. I’ll put you in touch. He’ll work some magic. Tasha, I’m so fucking proud of you.” My arms come around her again in another hug, unable to help myself. Her scent invades my senses, light notes of jasmine that smells so good.

“I’ve missed you, big guy.”

“You have no idea,” I reply, stroking her hair as our hug ends. “You’ve got no clue, kitty cat. I’ve missed you a thousand times more.”

She smiles. It’s small and hesitant as she fidgets some more with the strap of her clutch purse. “Would you, uh…” she smiles awkwardly, though it’s still a gorgeous smile to me. “Would you like to do dinner sometime?”

“Tasha ‘Vixen’ Henson asking me on a date,” I tease. “You don’t do romance and relationships.”

“Maybe Tasha didn’t. ButNatashadoes.”

I grin wide, my teddybear softness activated no matter how big of a brute I am. I check the time on my watch. “It’s eleven. Too late to take you up on that offer, yes or no?”

“I seem to remember another dinner we had that was even later.”

“Then it sounds like we’ve got no excuse. C’mere.” I lift her off the stool by the waist and set her down on her feet. My heart’s hammering in excitement and my wide grin has only spread even more.

Tasha leans into me as I put my arm around her and we head for the exit. There’s got to be a restaurant somewhere on this island that’s still open.

“Just one caveat,” Tasha says.

“I’m listening.”

She tips her head back slightly to look at me as we walk side by side. “I need us to take things very, very slow. Is that okay?”

I give her shoulders a squeeze and kiss her brow. “Anything you want, kitty cat.”

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