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With Kim. “I don’t think I can do this.”
“Do what?” He slides closer, his eyes edgy.
“Be with you and not... bewithyou,” I whisper. “Great.” I glance up. “Why did you tell him that, Jess?”
“I’m glad you told him that. Because—”
The garage whirs and starts to go up. Dad’s heading out to pick up Vi, and Gabe’s car is in the way.
A trace of panic pinches mouth, and he opens my door. “Come with me to my house? Just for fifteen minutes. Then if you want, I’ll bring you home.”
The garage door is halfway up, and I can see Dad’s legs getting into his truck.
“Please?” The need in Gabe’s voice connects with the need in me.
I can’t say no. I never can. Not to Gabe. I get in the car.
Our drive to the other side of Highland Park is stretched with restless silence. Under the streetlights, I watch his face. I can’t be sure what he wants. I think it’s me? But the not-knowing makes my heartbeats crazy. The Charger feels wrong. Foreign. Like the tense way we’re sitting. I miss the Mustang, I miss Gabe and I in the Mustang, and by the time he pulls into his driveway, I’m scratching the heck out of my wrist.
He helps me out of the car and rubs his thumb across the welt. “You still do that, huh?”
Only when I’m anxious—which hasn’t happened in a while. “How’s your mom?”
“I went to see her the day after we...”
Broke up. My heart stutters out the rest. “How was it?”
“Pretty rough.” He gestures for me to head up to the porch and we go into his house. “Can we maybe talk about that later?” He flips on the switch for the overhead chandelier in the huge foyer. “I want to tell you everything, but I have something else to say first and believe it or not my palms are sweaty.”
“I’m ordering takeout.” Gabe’s sister walks out of the kitchen holding car keys and a paper menu. “Oh.” She sees me and stops.
“Coley, Jess.” He nods toward each of us. “Jess, Coley.”
Last time I saw her was in the hotel hall. And I didn’t know she was his sister. Tonight, I’m liking her a lot better. “Hi.” I offer my hand.
“You can be BFFs later.” With his hand on my back, he steers me up a wide staircase. “Just order pizza,” he calls over his shoulder.
“Done.” Coley laughs.
“You didn’t have to be rude.”
He locks our fingers together, and his are warm and perfect and not at all damp.
“You lied about the sweaty palms.”
“It was my way of telling you I was nervous.” At the top step, he turns right and leads me into his room. While it’s done in navy boy colors, instead of posters and sports trophies, Gabe has framed scripts and an Emmy fromRaising Ryder.
“You’re never nervous.”
Letting go of my hand, he shuts the door. “Trust me.” His expression goes dead-serious. “I’m nervous.”
“Why?” Because I’m pretty sure it’s my heart that’s going off the rails. Lightheaded, I lean against his closed door.
“Because I don’t know what you’re going to do when I tell you how much it’s killing me not to kiss you.”
My heart is gone. Flying off the tracks. “Don’t say that if this is a one-time thing and you’re going to leave me.”
“I didn’t leave last time. You did.” Instead of moving toward me like I expect, he backs up to a small shelf stacked with Dad’s books.
