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Sylvie looked up at him, her eyes filled with gratitude and relief. “Thank you, Gator,” she whispered, her voice cracking with emotion. “That means everything.”
Gator knew now that when Bruno had told him he’d done it because he owed Gator, he had in fact done a whole lot more than he’d let on.
* * *
As Gator satin the quiet stillness of the room, his arms comforting her, shielding and protecting her…his thoughts wandered to the courage she had mustered to finally stand up to Marvin. It filled his heart with pride, knowing that that pivotal moment would serve her well for the rest of her life. Her newfound strength, born from that desperate act of self-defense, would ensure she would never fall victim to abuse again. And he knew that he would always be by her side, loving and cherishing her as she deserved.
Gator had always held the utmost respect for all women, and Sylvie was no exception. He admired her resilience, her beauty, and her kindness. She would always have what she never had, someone who would shield her from harm, and give herl’amour et le soutien, the love and support that she had long been denied.
20
Following her confession,Sylvie appeared eager to talk, as though she were seeking some kind of justification for her actions. Gator didn’t believe that was necessary – he saw it as justice having been served. However, she had spent most of her life making excuses for the injustices she had endured, and old habits die hard.
Her voice was tinged with a hint of sadness as she spoke. “I really did love him,” she began. “He was my one and only boyfriend, and at first, I was infatuated with him. And as time went on, I fell in love with a lot of things about him.”
Her eyes drifted off, lost in thought as she continued. “He had things that happened in his past that came out over the years. His parents had controlled his life through fear, manipulation, and financial dependence. I knew this right from the start, but I thought that with time and a job of his own, he could break free from those chains.”
A somber expression crossed her face as she went on. “But even after he began earning good money and the issue of financial dependence faded, the fear lingered. He was always worried…anxious, no matter how much we had. It was like a security blanket for him, and it was never enough. Even back then, he was considering illegal stuff to get more money, to make sure that he was safe. But I would manage to talk him out of it, telling him that what he was thinking would make him…us…anything but safe.”
Sylvie’s eyes flickered as she spoke of the people he associated with to do those illegal ventures. “The type of people he would have to deal with... it just built on the fear he already harbored from his childhood,” she murmured, her voice barely audible. “Some of the same people are still in his circle of friends. Fucking creeps, some of them. They always made me feel uneasy.
“For most of the time we were together, I could bring him back around to sensible thinking. But the longer we were in a relationship, the more of these little quirks of his personality emerged. And they would come out in a way where he would trust no one, including me, and he would want to control everyone, including me,” she said, her voice laden with emotion.
Sylvie’s eyes finally met Gator’s as she continued. “I thought I could fix him, but then one day, I realized that trying to fix him was just the same as him trying to control me. I decided I had to get out of the relationship. It wasn’t easy, but it was the best thing I ever did for myself.”
Gator’s eyes drifted to the ring on her finger. He wondered what that was all about.
She caught his gaze and smiled. “It’s not what you think.”
He looked back into her eyes, waiting for an explanation.
“Marriage was the one thing I could never bring myself to do, and it infuriated him that he couldn’t make me do it. The thought of it would trigger panic attacks. Marriage felt like a trap, and by avoiding it, I believed that if things didn’t improve...or if they worsened...I’d find it easier to break free and have a life of my own.”
“So...” He left the question hanging.
“Oh, right. This is an ‘I’m-married’ ring to ward off anyone else. After finally breaking free from him, I couldn’t imagine being in another relationship.”
Gator grinned. “Didn’t work, did it?”
“Seems not,” she said, her face brightening as she twirled the ring around her finger.
“Happy about that?”
“Very much so.” She smiled. “Life is always changing...sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse. I’m still healing. I’ve been attending therapy, trying to rediscover the person I was meant to be before my self-esteem and best life were taken from me.”
“Maybe your best life is just around the corner,” he suggested.
Sylvie echoed the sentiment Gator had been hoping to convey: “Maybe my best life is right in front of me.”
* * *
The afternoon slipped awayas Sylvie talked, and Gator listened. It seemed as if she needed to unload the weight of the years of turmoil she had endured, and Gator was happy to listen. He knew it wasn’t his place to offer advice, especially on a subject that he didn’t fully comprehend. While he had his own parental issues and his mother often belittled him, he had lost all respect for his parents, and their words carried no weight.
“I used to be the one giving you advice when you came to me with your problems,” she said.
Gator grinned. “Ha! Yeah, you did, didn’t you? Sometimes I’d come to you with things just because I liked talking to you, and it’d get you away from Marvin for a bit. I was obsessed with you back then.” He chuckled, his eyes sparkling with mischief.
Sylvie blushed, and she looked away for a moment before meeting Gator’s gaze again. “Well, there was something you told me once that I should’ve taken to heart way back then. I would’ve never gone through all these years with someone who didn’t deserve me.”
