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His pain-filled gaze finds me, and when our eyes meet, I gasp.
I know him.
My blades clatter to the ground.
“Baxon,” I choke on a sob and stumble forward.
He’s a sorcerer, like me. I could have helped him once, but instead, I chose my own survival. As I stare at his mangled body, I realize that I could have prevented this. This is my fault.
“What the hell did they do to you,” I say, my voice cracking.
His mouth moves, but no sound comes from his cracked lips. He blinks and a single tear rolls down the side of his face.
My hands shake as they hover over his broken body. I’m not sure what to do. I move to the contraption holding his chest open. I should take it out of his body and close up his chest. I touch the handles of the contraption and gently pull upward. Baxon groans in agony, and fresh red blood wells where the metal meets his skin.
I release the handles and snatch my hands back. “Shit. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
Daimis moves next to me, examining Baxon. “I don’t know if there is anything we can do that would help him.”
I swipe a tear away and shake my head. “No, that’s not good enough.”
ButIcan help him. I can heal him with my magic. And it would reveal to the soon-to-be King of Thaaryn that I’m a sorcerer. He would have my secret, one of them anyway. And he could destroy me with it. I could potentially end up just like Baxon.
I look up at Daimis. He gazes down at Baxon with sincere sorrow and empathy. He turns his attention to me. “I’m sorry, Sky.”
He didn’t do this to Baxon. The Regent did. Daimis would never willingly allow something like this to happen, I can see it in his eyes. And if there’s a chance I could lose Daimis’s trust, or even if it means he might put me in a cell for being a sorcerer, it’s a chance I have to take. I can’t just let Baxon die, not when there’s something I can do to help. I can’t fail him again. I won’t.
I square my shoulders. “I can fix this.”
Daimis’s brows knit, but I turn back to Baxon. I hold my hands over his chest and with all of my raw undiluted anger for the Regent and the atrocities he’s done to my friend, I call upon my magic. It responds immediately, tingling under my skin, heat coming to the surface. I say the incantation for healing and feel the magic working. But far too soon, it stops, retreating back deep inside me, like a spooked animal backing into its cave.
I open my eyes and stare down at Baxon’s damaged, bleeding body. I turn my hands, palms up, staring at them as if they’re traitors.Why didn’t it work?
Daimis puts a gentle hand on my shoulder. “He’s too far gone for healing magic.”
“No,” I breathe out. But even as I say it, I know he’s right. My hope deflates, leaving me a hollowed-out husk of despair. Even magic has its limits. If one’s injuries are too severe, the magic cannot heal.
Baxon whispers something so quietly that I only hear a small wheeze with the air pushing from his mouth. Daimis and I lean our heads forward to try and hear him.
Once I’m close enough, there is no mistaking what he’s saying over and over again.
“Kill me. Kill me. Kill me.”
Chapter14
Vow
Kill him?I rear back as if I was burned. But even if I can’t hear Baxon’s words anymore, they’re echoed in his gaze. He wants an end to his misery. He wants me to kill him.
I look up to Daimis and even though his jaw is set, misery lines his face. “It’s the kindest thing we can do for him.”
I glance back at Baxon, who closes his eyes for a moment as if he’s nodding his agreement.
My heart clenches, and my breathing increases. “But. . . but I’m supposed to save him,” I say. “Notkillhim.”
“He’s beyond saving,” Daimis’s voice is painfully gentle. “You know it’s true, or else your magic would have healed him. The only thing we can do now is end his suffering.” Daimis gestures to the door. “Why don’t you wait for me outside.”
He would take on the burden for me.
