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“Lay, you happy now?”
“She was when she saw me. She was already awake.”
“Figured. She’s used to me coming in to get her around this time. She showed them little ass teeth as soon as she saw you, huh?”
The pure elation in his tone was breath-altering.
“Yes. All two of them,” I responded before picking up the glass of water he’d sat on the other side of my plate. It was the start of each morning.
“Leave that pretty baby alone, Halo. The rest will grow.”
“Umm. Hmmm.”
I couldn’t help but moan when the cheese eggs touched my tongue. Though I hardly cooked, Ledge was always in the kitchen. The new bean growing in my stomach kept me awfully tired and sometimes in bed for hours. Ledge was understanding and kept the stove hot on the days I could barely move.
Dr. Sanders explained that it was quite normal being that I’d gotten pregnant right after growing a baby for nine months. Another nine months would tire me out. It was safe to say that it had. Work, even remotely, was no longer an option. Though I didn’t like the idea much, I’d finally come to terms with being jobless. It gave me time to focus on something I loved and the ability to create things I didn’t understand how much I loved until I started creating them.
Concrete home decor had quickly become therapeutic for me. And the pieces I’d made over the last four months were stunning. I’d sold the five large pieces I’d made over the last four months, all to Ledge’s family but the feeling was amazing nonetheless.
Interior decorating, the thing I loved, was on the rise for me as well. I’d been gifted the opportunity to stage my first home. It happened to be Lawe’s first investment property under his new investment company’s belt and I couldn’t be more honored.
Ledge reached across the table and grabbed my left hand before we both bowed.
“Dear God, thank you for the food that we’re about to receive,” he began to pray.
2
Okay.You do this every day. You’ve got this. It’s only outside. What’s the big deal, right? Nothing’s going to happen. You’ll be back home in no time.It was the prep talk I gave myself each and every morning for the last two weeks.
Three months ago, Ledge spent night and day teaching me to be a bit more independent. It was a resolution of mine for the year and he was holding me to it. I’d learned how to drive and he’d even gifted me a brand-new Audi truck to exercise my independence in. However, it sat in the driveway collecting dust, except for the last two weeks.
In an attempt to participate a bit more in my daughter’s care and to improve my mental health, I decided to be the drop-off parent while Ledge picked our baby girl up. Eisenberg’s Smiles was her destination each morning. Though it wasn’t far from our home, the thought of leaving was sometimes overwhelming.
Just call him. I begged. I can’t. I’ve got this. I can’t worry him. I can’t.With gritted teeth, I sighed. Ledge was heaviest on my mind and heart each morning when it was time to make my exit. He left the house each morning as agreed upon just so that I could get out of the door without collapsing into his arms or crawling back in bed.
Door. It’s just a door.I reasoned with Lailah on my hip.Yeah. It’s just a door. Before I was able to talk myself out of it, I gripped the knob, turned it, and snatched the door open. The bright sun welcomed me. Swiftly, I stepped outside and slammed it behind me. Deeply, I exhaled and then inhaled just as much. I’d made it out. That was always a reason to celebrate. It was the hardest part. Once I was out of the house, I could adapt.
When I made it to the back door of the SUV, I propped Lailah’s door open while stuffing her in the car seat that sat behind the driver and passenger seat, right in the middle. Without any fuss, she allowed me to buckle her in and take my seat in the front. After I situated my mirrors and started the engine, my mind, and heart retraced their steps.
I tapped the large screen on the dashboard, trying to access my call log. Just as I began tapping, an alarming sound boomed throughout the vehicle. My hands stiffened as my body jerked and my eyes widened. I could feel my heart racing and my breaths per second increase. It wasn’t until my eyes connected with the screen again that I realized what was happening.
“God, you scared me, my love,” I said to Ledge after tapping the green button on the screen, “Oh my gosh.”
“Sorry about that, pretty lady. Just making sure you made it out.”
“I did, baby. It was a little rough, but I powered through.”
“And, you’re going to keep powering through. I’m proud of you.”
“Thanks, baby.”
“I wish I could’ve kissed you on your way out of the door,” she whined.
“Soon, baby. I promise. I just need a little more time. If you’re here, I won’t do it. And, you won’t let me.”
“Not alone, anyway,” he added.
“Or at all.”
