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“Take me to Ivan. This shit ends tonight,” I grit out and pray to God I can stomach seeing the fucker that tried to ruin me.
* * *
The moment the car stops,I’m leaping out and staring at the building in front of me with so many mixed emotions. I turn to look at Knight when he rounds the front of the car, he at least has the fucking decency to look sheepish.
“Bishop made us all swear not to tell you.” He tries to plead with me, I shake my head letting him know without words that I am not fucking impressed.
“Be honest, if you knew where he was, you would have fixated on that fact and it would have fucked with your head.” I want to deny what Vin says, I can’t though. He’s right. Knowing Ivan was being heldherewould have wreaked havoc on my mind daily and knowing he was this close to me, would have sent me into a tailspin.
“Ya’ll should have told me.” My argument is weak, everyone knows it. Two sets of headlights pulling into the carpark has me looking back to Knight.
“Vin text him, he’s our brother but he’s still the boss.” I can tell Knight is weary of how I will react so I put him at ease.
“I know. I knew one of you would have told him and I’m not mad.” Knight visibly relaxes. He and Vin come to stand beside me as we watch Bishop, Gage and King climb out of Bishop’s Tesla. Knight’s Dodge parks beside Bish—Koby, Anya and Ally all climb out. Allison smiles at me and I’ll admit, it means a lot to know she is here for me even though I have been distant and frankly a dick to her since I came back. The six of them make their way over to us. Ally being the mother she is doesn’t when the others do. She comes for me and I don’t hesitate to open my arms for her, a sob tears from her as she runs for me. I wrap my arms around her and hold her close to me as she buries her face in my chest and cries. I feel like an utter dick for how I have treated her these past few months and vow to make it up to her.
“I’ve missed you so much.” She hiccups and I bury my face in the crook of her neck.
“I’ve missed you to. I promise I’ll make it up to you and Meelz.” She pulls back and I wipe her tears away with my thumbs. She reaches up and grips my forearms.
“We’d like that very much. She has missed her Uncle Cook a lot.” I smile wide at my niece’s name for me. Amelia still can’t say mine and Knight’s names so she calls us Right and Cook.
“Are you sure you’re ready for this?” Bishop asks, the no nonsense tone of his voice tells me he’s in Don mode. I wrap my arm around Ally’s shoulders and tuck her into my side as I meet Bishop’s gaze and nod. I turn to King next to see him smiling at us. I’m proud of him for getting over his hang ups and always accusing Ally of cheating on him with one of us. “I need the words, Rook.”
Taking a deep breath, I look around me and a sense of rightfulness flows through me. In the pits of my dispare I failed to notice or even care to see that each of these people has always been here for me and only want what’s best for me.
“Yeah, B, I’m ready to end this shit and exact my fucking pound of flesh.” A dark glint enters Bishop’s gaze as he smiles darkly and nods his approval as he leads us inside the gym I now own and run. The place I have been training daily, never knowing that the star of my nightmares was being held just below me.
Clare
I’m huddled up on the threadbare couch in the staff room trying to get comfy and warm with Bob tucked into my chest. I hate bringing him here with me to work, the poor thing always shakes and assumes I am going to leave him behind. I stroke his fur and murmur words of love and reassurance. I’ve spent the better part of the night bawling my eyes out and now that I have finally stopped, I’m trying to get some sleep before work tomorrow. I can’t shut my mind off! I feel so hurt that Rook knew where I was and never had the balls to come and face me. I dealt with the loss of our baby alone. I had no one to turn to. My dad and brother lied to me! Did I do something in a past life to warrant everyone I love shitting on me?
Tears begin to fall again and I don’t bother to wipe them away, I’m alone in this world with nowhere to go. I’m sleeping on the couch in an animal shelter. The universe is having a great big laugh at my expense right now. I may as well set myself up in one of the cages with the dogs and hope a family will come along and adopt me. Bob sitting upright and barking snaps me out of my turmoil. I sit up and try to calm him, not wanting to be caught by one of the staff that may have come in to retrieve something they forgot. I feel panic rising inside me as I hear the sound of footfalls coming toward me. My breaths become shallow rapid pants as I wait to see if whoever it is will come in here and catch me. I can’t lose this job! I need the money to live now that I have no place to go.
The door to the staff room opens and Bob goes into hysterics barking. My jaw unhinges when I see who it is standing in the open doorway. When his gaze lands on me, his features slacken and a guilty look enters his gaze. I can’t stop the sob that tears out of me. He rushes over and drops down onto the couch beside me, pulling me to him and holding me and a barking Bob while I cry. I’m so confused, I don’t know which way is up at this point and I hate that.
“I’m here, Clare-bear, I got you,” he says as he holds my sobbing form. We stay like this for so long and Luka doesn’t moan or groan, he just sits there and holds me tight lulling me into a false sense of security. Even as a child whenever Luka would tell me everything would be okay or hold me close whenever I was sad, I always knew everything would be okay and we would make it through whatever life threw at us. When he met the Murdoch’s, he pulled away from me. I thought I was losing my brother until Rook found me. He took away the ache of my brother being gone so much, until he was ripped away from me as well and I was left on my own to care for my sick Dad. Losing Dad was fucking hard, he was all I had. Coming to New York again after Luka pushed me away that first time was hard, but I had nowhere else to go and I didn’t think any of this would happen. I thought Rook would be away at college so I wouldn’t run into him. I dreamed my brother and I would mourn the loss of our dad together and spend the weekends hanging out watching movies and catching up on all the time that we lost.
“I’m sorry for being a burden,” I mumble against his chest. He sighs and rests his chin on top of my head.
“You’re not a burden. I am so fucking sorry for making you feel like you are. You’re my little sister and I’ll always be here for you.”
“Then why did you turn me away when I first came to tell you about Dad?” He pushes me back and cups my cheeks between his large hands. I gasps when I see the remnants of tears on his cheeks.
“Because I never wanted you tainted by this life that I chose to live.”
“Then leave it, don’t go back!” I beg. He smiles sadly and I know no matter what I say he will never do as I asked.
“If Rook walked in here right now and poured his heart out to you, would you tell him to fuck off?” I bite my lip and shake my head, he got me there. “This life is hard and dangerous—”
“Then why do you do it?”
“Because they are good people,” he answers, but I can tell there is more to this story so I push him.
“How did you get into this life?” He releases his hold on me and slouches back into the couch. I tuck my legs under me and pull Bob into my lap as I wait for Luka to speak.
“Tony Murdoch was the one who found me.” My mouth opens in shock. “He found out I was kicked out from my last two high schools for hacking. When he learned at the age of seventeen that I got pinged for hacking into the octagon for fun and was the youngest person to ever make the FBI’s most wanted list, he recruited me.” I remember that when he got kicked out of school Dad and Lilly were so mad. “It took me three months after working for him to realize he was a piece of shit. I wanted out and Bishop told me if I helped him take down his father and transfer all the accounts and business holdings to him, he would grant me my freedom.”
“His father is dead now, so why did you stay?” He rests his head back against the couch and closes his eyes.
