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My heart leapt. I reached out with my untamed magic, a desperate idea brewing in the back of my mind. Rhoan would hate this, but I wanted to try…
It was too late.
Beryl crumbled to glittering dust. A soft breeze swept her away and scattered her across the waves of the nearby lake.
For a long while, I sat there and stared at the dust in my hands.
The curse in my bones whispered to me. I could have brought her back the same way I brought myself back not too long ago. While it seemed an awful idea, I’d wanted to bring back the child and show her that she could be loved.
She deserved to be shown love the same way my mortal mother loved me, the same way my fae mother loved me. Perhaps, someday, the same way that Rhoan loved me.
But Beryl was no more. I clenched my fist with the moonlight-colored dust in it and stood. The battle was over. I should have felt better. Instead, I couldn’t bear the weight of the stone in the pit of my stomach.
When I turned and the dream around me fell away, I lifted my gaze to meet Rhoan’s across the court. He was beautiful, framed by the white flowers covering the walls, but I couldn’t find it in me to smile at him.
He crossed the distance between us. While fae all around the room whooped and hollered for the demise of Beryl, I stared at where she’d once been and wondered if I’d made the right decision.
It should have felt like the right thing to do. Beryl had been an awful person…But I could have become a horrible person had Ostara raised me. I shuddered to think how vain and self-absorbed I would have become. The things she’d said to me upon meeting had been absolutely horrible.
Ostara had turned over a new leaf while living in my court. Was Beryl too far gone for that? Her crimes were vastly worse, but I wanted to believe that a blank slate could do anything. If we could just pull Beryl back together again as a child or something…then she could become anyone without the weight of the adult she’d become hovering over her.
“My arcana is all about life,” I told Rhoan. “It doesn’t feel good to take one. I can’t help but wonder if there’s another way to make this right.”
His lips tightened for a heartbeat, but he swallowed and nodded. The man would follow me into Hell if that’s what it meant to love and trust me.
“Do you have any ideas?” he asked.
Plants were my strong suit. I knew how to bury a seed and nurse it to life. It wasn’t easy, but love and patience made all the difference. Right now, I had love, but I had no patience. Still, I wanted to try to create a new seed.
“Remember when Del killed me, and the Seelie castle helped bring me back?” I looked up to meet Rhoan’s gaze. “What if we could do that here, but bring back a different version of Beryl?”
The room went silent. I knew they’d heard what I said, and no one agreed with me. My arcana churned inside me. It was restless here in the court that now belonged to me. I overflowed with so much power this close to the realm of dreams.
My arcana needed something to do, it needed to spread hope and love.
Turning to face those who’d gathered, I asked, “Do you trust me?”
Tal nodded immediately. As did my close friends, Addie and Vi. The dryads and some of the Seelie fae took a moment longer to nod. The redcaps raised their weapons and let out a battle cry that I took as agreement.
My heart swelled with appreciation and love. I’d built this court on something altogether new to the fae: hope. And we would carry that forward and give it to everyone in our lives.
Together, Rhoan and I knelt. I dug past the green layer that’d grown over the earthen floor and into the dirt below. Hands in the earth, I could feel the seed of power that I’d buried. I could also feel the corruption within it.
Beryl had known about the seed, and she’d tried to place a fragment of herself within it so that she could turn the tides against me. Only, she’d been too slow. This would work in our favor now. I grabbed ahold of that small seed of Beryl’s power and did my best to wash it clean of the corruption she’d accrued over the years.
In the end, I held a small, pink seed of power in my hand. It pulsed with the potential for life, for Beryl’s life. Lungs clutching my breath tight, I put the seed back into the ground.
Rhoan patted the earth where I’d placed the seed and together, we poured our arcana into it. My lips trembled with anticipation…
But nothing happened.
I wanted to weep and shout and slam my fists into the earth. If I’d taken a small amount of time to grow some nightsmane, then I would have a little bit more power. I would be able to wield the threads of fate themselves.
My head shot up. Across the room, Addie and I locked eyes. Even from here, I could see the glow of power in her pocket. If she consumed the leaf of the world tree again, then she could change fate for us.
Was I really going to sacrifice an entire world just for one life?
Addie reached into her pocket. Beside me, Rhoan exhaled as if he, too, were disappointed. I put a hand on his forearm in a silent plea to wait.
