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He rubs his chin. “I’m so sorry to hear that. I can’t imagine how hard it’s been on you….”
“No. You can’t. Because for some reason, despite it having happened to both of us, I seem to be the only one getting the shit end of this.”
“Woah. What do you mean the only one getting the shit end?” His tone increases, and he starts to sound angry.
“Yeah. Everyone looks at me like I’m the victim and I’m some poor helpless girl that got used by a rich man. Do you know how hard that is?”
“Do you know how hard it is to be the rich man everyone thinks used and toyed with an innocent woman?” His tone is only making me angrier, and I’m getting ready to stand to walk away from him when he continues. “Do you know how hard it is to feel how I’ve been feeling and to be avoided by the person you love?”
My eyes dart to him.That can’t be what he’s saying. Am I hearing him correctly? There’s no way he’s meaning to say it, right?
I stare at him, but he doesn’t correct himself or say he misspoke. “What? Say that again. I don’t think I heard you correctly.” My heart is pounding as he smiles, and I brace myself for what he will say next.
48
AIDEN
Josephine looks at me like she doesn’t believe what she hears. The shock on her face worries me, but I repeat it without hesitation.
“I love you, Josephine.”
The words slip out of my mouth, but they flow easily, like I mean to say them to her. My stomach’s in knots now. I’m scared for her response because I don’t honestly know how she feels.
I pray she will give me an insight into her mind and tell me how she feels, but I don’t know if she’s past her anger yet. She’s staring at me, not saying a word. I begin panicking, thinking I’m moving too fast for her. This was a mistake.
No. Aiden, why aren’t you waiting for her to cool down? She’s not back on your side yet. Why are you throwing in the I love you like this? I want her to know, but the way I casually toss it into the conversation leaves her looking confused.
This isn’t the way I want this to go. She deserves an apology first, or this isn’t going to end the way I want it to.
“Josephine, I’m so sorry for causing the hurt I did. I never meant in any way for you to get hurt. In fact, it has killed me knowing I caused you pain. The time I have spent with you has by far been the best of my life. I care for you in a way I never have in my life,” I blurt out.
Every single word of this is equally disorganized, Aiden. Great work.
I look at Josephine, curious about her reaction, before speaking again. Our eyes meet as a single tear rolls down her cheek, immediately gutting me inside.
I have to talk fast, or she will think I’m only saying I love you to make her stay. She’s finally listening. Don’t stop now.
“You are truly the woman I want to spend my entire life with, Josephine. Not because of the stupid contract but because you make me feel complete. I didn’t feel like this before you. If there is one thing all of this has taught me, it’s that I don’t ever want to lose you. You have become my best friend and the woman I want to do everything with.”
I’m still waiting to hear something from her. She’s silently staring into my eyes, not giving me a hint at what she feels until she stretches out her arm. She places her hand on mine on the table, and her eyes are soft and kind.
Looking deeply into her pools of green brings back the warmth inside of me that I never want to see disappear, reminding me why I’m here. Suddenly, my heart flutters. I seem to be holding my breath, waiting on her response.
“Aiden, you did cause me a lot of hurt,” Josephine says, pausing as if she’s searching for the words to express how she feels.
Fear boils inside of me, waiting for her following statement, thinking she’s trying to let me down gently. I can’t really blame her for rejecting me, but the thought still terrifies me.
“Although you did cause me a hurt like I’ve never felt before, I have still been missing you so much. I have deep feelings for you, and we have grown a connection much further than I ever expected. I just wasn’t sure how to handle the pain of thinking it might have all been false. Now that I know how you feel, I’m grateful you have come to talk to me. I’ve been hoping you felt the same. So, Aiden, I love you too,” she says.
Shock hits me like a brick wall. I’m hanging on to her every word, letting it fill me with joy.
She loves me. She truly does. Knowing this will make the next part go a little smoother,I think and stand from my chair quickly, pulling Josephine out of her seat and into a hug.
The smell of her perfume is a nice familiar one. It’s almost intoxicating, smelling it again. Holding the woman I love, now knowing she loves me back. The joy of knowing she has the same feelings for me overwhelms me.
I’m not going to lose her.I can’t help but smile as I hold her close, breathing in her scent and taking in every part of this perfect moment.
Suddenly, the ring I’ve brought with me gets a little bit heavier in my pocket, reminding me of the ending of my plan. After a moment, I pull away from our embrace and smile at her.
