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He turns to me, teeth sharp and glistening. He is so handsome, sometimes I forget that he has agreed to be mine.
“I love you so much,” he whispers.
“And I love you even more.”
I pull him to me in the car, and he weeps into my shoulder. It is the first time I feel his entire body shake, like the tremor of an earthquake, until he cannot shake anymore.
The moment fades, his body going still. And in that moment, I can sense it. He and I are renewed, looking forward to a future where our grief does not control us for the first time.
44
KADEN
Ican’t believe that this is the life I get to live. Here I am, with two year old twins and an incredible smoke show of a wife. Living here on the coast where the wind blows freely through open windows the majority of the year round, I love listening to the little patter of feet moving through the house. I love feeling the house brimming with laughter and love.
Both Amber and I continue to work for my grandfather’s company. I have merged my old business with my new business, running both now as CEO. We took a year off together to raise the kids, which was a year of evolving for the both of us, too. So many sleepless nights and midnight pizza orders. Our days were often exhausted by early risers and filled with hysterical laughter. I wouldn’t trade any of it for the world.
I have the world, the universe, a constant ebb and flow of our relationship as mother and father, right here in this house. Sometimes, I choose to work from home in my office, letting me take in as many moments with little Georgia and Percy as I can.
I lean on my palm, wearing only a T-shirt and boxer shorts. I have traded in, most of the time anyway, my three-piece suits for comfortable wear. It suits me better now as someone with young toddlers, and it also suits my overall mental health. Not that I don’t enjoy taking Amber out to dinner every now and then and spoiling her; but it is mostly the sight of her that keeps oxygen flowing through my lungs.
Even through the roller coaster of raising two newborn babies, our spark has yet to go out. When she looks at me, I still get tingly inside. I touch her shoulders, her bum, kiss her neck, and she still curls against me. I haven’t lost my appetite for her mind, her heart, her soul, her body. If anything, having children has only made the connection all the more closer and spicier.
Last night, we binged some terrible reality shows while the kids slept. We had hot chocolate on a chilly evening and kept the TV volume low, rubbing each other's feet and trying to keep our laughter stifled. It was beautiful, and today the twins decided to sleep in a bit, which was an extra blessing.
I rise up from bed, seeing the sun pouring through the blinds. I get up quietly and ready myself without waking the others. Then I make my way into my office, typing up some emails as the week comes to a close. Everything in the house is silent as I sit, looking out of the window, reposed with serenity and gratitude for each and every moment of my life.
I hear a faint knock on the door behind me, and I whip around, excited every morning to see the love of my life.
“Good morning, handsome.”
Amber rubs her eyes as she makes her way towards me. She is wearing a silk robe, and it doesn’t entirely cover up her voluptuous, delicious form. I wrap my arms around her bare waist and pull her in close, leaning upon her lovely breasts.
“God, your skin is so soft,” I say, breathing in her scent.
Amber giggles, running her hands through my hair. She then sighs, and we take a moment to just feel each other, all without words and the chaos of thought.
“Do you think they’ll stay asleep this time?” Amber says with a snort.
On multiple occasions, Amber and I had tried making love in the mornings while the twins were asleep. It was a time we had found was better for the both of us, energy-wise. But the first few times we’d tried it, one or both of them would rise up with a deafening cry, like they knew we were busy.
“It’s like we’re ringing alarm bells in their bedrooms,” I whisper into her skin.
Amber lightly pushes my head away in a playful manner, then slips her hand in mine. She gives me a sultry look and pulls me to my feet.
“Nothing wrong with giving it a go,” she whispers.
We walk like spies on a mission back to the bedroom, where we both proceed to get naked. Amber is still so exciting and intriguing to me. When she lets herself go in our love making, she is ferocious and knows exactly what she wants.
I take heed of her, everything, offering up anything and everything she could ever dream of.
We make love as quietly as we can, pleasing each other in ways no one else can. And for the first time, the twins do not interrupt the final movements that bring us both into earth-shattering climax.
We lay together, smiling with sweat glistening off our bodies. We lay there for as long as we can, before hearing the very first expression of a cry and billowing sniffles coming from down the hall.
“They have great timing,” I whisper.
Amber laughs, then gives me a deep kiss. I pull her in closer with a growl, taking her to straddle me, but she shakes her head back and forth.
