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“It has nothing to do with being brave, Autumn, and I wish you could understand that. I’m so deeply sorry for fucking with your heart, but I can’t lose your family. They mean everything to me.”
“But you’re willing to lose me? Do I mean that little to you?”
“Kid, I can’t answer that. I’m sorry.”
I lost my shit, heaving, hyperventilating, wailing. I was a blubbering mess, and there would be nothing left of me after this. He was stealing it all. Every last part of me now belonged to him.
“Is this what dying feels like? Because you’re killing me, Julian.”
He kissed away my tears, and what once gave me peace, now gave me war. It created havoc in my body, not refuge anymore.
I was desperate.
Aching inside.
Instead of leaving with a bit of my pride, I did the only thing I could in a moment where I felt lost.
I kissed him.
Praying I could use my body to change his mind.
—Julian—
I could physically feel her agonizing emotions radiating off her in waves as she kissed me like her life depended on it. I wish I could tell you I didn’t expect what happened next, but I’d be lying.
I should have stopped her.
I should have told her no.
I should have done something, anything…
Except allow her to slide her dress off her body, leaving her in nothing but panties. When my stare didn’t leave her face, it wasn’t long until I lost this sudden power struggle we were in. Her delicate hands moved down my chest in a gradual, struggling motion, causing my breath to hitch. Her touch was different.
It was afflicting.
Torturous.
And so damn loving.
When her hands started moving lower toward my belt, I roughly shoved them away. It didn’t stop her assault—if anything it only provoked her.
But then…
She bit her lip, fucking baiting me.
“What do you think is going to go down here, kid?” My hands craved to grip onto her waist and show her who was in control which was exactly what she sought. My fingers pleaded with me to touch her, feel her, aching for something I shouldn’t, completely aware it would only lead to more trouble.
Chaos.
Conflict.
“Please,” she interrupted my thoughts with the sincerest expression I’d ever seen. “Don’t push me away.” Grabbing my hand, she placed it over her racing heart.
Revealing, “Feel my heart—it’s breaking for you.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
—Julian—
