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I must have made a noise, because Taj and Joseph pulled the curtain back and crowded closer to the shower. Joseph touched my shoulder; Taj cupped the back of my head.
X's eyes flew open and met mine, clear for the first time since he'd staggered home to us.
"It's okay," he rasped, but it wasn't.
"We're going to get you clean and healed," I promised, my voice so thick with emotion that it didn't sound like mine, "and then I'm going to kiss every single fucking scar on your body. You aremine,and you are beautiful, and I love you."
X's eyes slammed shut again, his brow pinched with agony. He swallowed, and didn't speak. Maybe he couldn't speak.
So I washed the blood from him and bit my lip to contain any more sounds as more words were revealed on his stomach and thighs—whore, monster, pathetic, useless, evil, slut.Every one was a wound on his body and soul, every slur and insult meant to do more than physical harm.
I paused at one word on his thigh that had been carved upside down—so X could read it clearly from above—and my hand shook on the shower head.
Unlovable.
How fuckingdareEidolon write this about my mate?How fucking dare he?
"Can you turn around for me, honey?" I asked when X’s legs were cleaned of blood, the brutal marks standing out as red, angry skin. Beside us, Taj sank onto the closed toilet seat, his fingers fisted in his hair. Joseph settled a hand on his shoulder.
We were a circle, a family; when any of us hurt, we all hurt. When anyone suffered, we all suffered.
"Avie," X rasped, his bloody head snapping up as he sought my gaze. "I didn't tell him anything. I promise."
I dropped the shower head so I could frame X's face with gentle hands, touching only unbroken skin.
"You kept us safe," I breathed, trying to keep my shit together so I didn't sob like a baby. "You were so strong. I'm proud of you."
X's bottom lip shook. He dove at me and threw his shaking arms around me, his breathing breaking apart.
"X, your cuts," I cried, desperate to hug him but too scared to hurt him.
"I don't care. I don't care.Please,little morsel."
NowIwas the one whose breathing was a mess. I wrapped my arms around him, tangling one hand carefully in his hair. I'd never—never—expected to hear that name again. I never thought he'd come back to us, never thought he'd survive Eidolon.
But Eidolon hadn’t planned to kill him; one look at what he did to my mate and that was obvious. Every cruel, unforgivable slur cut into X's skin was to hurt me as much as him. It was a message, it was revenge, and it was specifically designed to deal maximum pain.
Well, congrats, Eidolon, it worked.
Even in all my nightmares, I never pictured X withwordswritten by knives across his skin. I'd imagined the regular torture methods—fingernails ripped out, fingers cut off, burns, blood, and broken bones. This was worse. I didn't know how to explain it, but it was so much worse.
"We've got you now, X," Taj rumbled, his voice a promise and a warning. "No one will lay a single finger on you again."
"I'll burn them to dust," I promised my shaking mate.
"And I'll crush their souls to nothing," Joseph vowed. "There won't be a single atom of them left."
X sniffled, his face buried in my neck, not seeming to care that my clothes were soaked through. It was only when he rested enough weight on me to nearly send us tipping backwards that I remembered how weak he was. He was so mentally strong that it was easy to forget he was physically weak and—and close to death. But I could feed him, I could give him what he needed to heal, and Ark would be back soon with supplies, and everything would be okay.
Everythinghadto be okay.
I turned my face to kiss X's hair, and once I started, I couldn't stop. I kissed everywhere I could, covering his head and face in feather-soft brushes, frantic and terrified he'd be torn from my arms again.
When he leant more of his weight on me, I held him to me with one hand and reached between us, popping the button of my jeans. Careful not to unbalance my mate, I dragged the zip down and shimmied the denim over my hips.
I didn’t get my jeans any lower than my butt, but I managed to do it without letting go of X. For a moment I was full of pride at the accomplishment, but then panic and dread swept back in and ate every other emotion.
"I've got you," I swore, laying more kisses on X's cheek as I leaned back into the shower wall, finding his hand and bringing it between my legs.
