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Dad made it back home just in time for graduation. A day I wasn’t confident I would’ve made it to on my own. I knew damn well I wouldn’t have been there without Starlet. If I were honest, I didn’t know if I’d even be alive still if it weren’t for her. Yet because of her, I’d made it out of the winter, and I’d discovered spring with summer right around the corner.
Graduation caps and gowns were the most uncomfortable thing I’d ever worn. They didn’t look good, either. It was as if it was the school’s final way to jab their students in the side with some form of annoyance.
The tassel kept dangling in front of my face as I sat on the football field, staring toward the stage. The bleachers were packed with people, families and friends all there to celebrate the graduates. The fact that Dad was in those bleachers meant the world to me.
The sun beamed down overhead, and I felt as if I was melting into a pool of sweat. It was wild to me how just a few months ago, everything was covered in snow, and now the sun had me wanting to go skinny-dipping.
I’d take the hot days over the cold ones, though.
Weston was in charge of calling the students’ names as we received our diplomas. Lucky for me, I’d be one of the first to walk the stage, thanks to my last name. When I was called up, I stood from my chair and headed across the stage. To my surprise, a burst of cheering was heard, not only from my friends who were graduating but from the stands, too. I glanced over at them, and my chest tightened.
Star.
My Star.
My heart stopped for a split second as I froze in place, unsure how to move forward.
Her lips turned up into a big smile, and I felt my whole body warm. Shit. Even from a distance, she still controlled my every move.
“Milo,” Weston whisper-shouted, snapping me out of my daze.
I shook my head and cleared my thoughts the best I could. I glanced back at Starlet one more time before walking toward my uncle. I shook Weston’s hand, and he pulled me into a tight hug. As he held on, I felt his tears falling. “I’m so fucking proud of you, kid,” he whispered.
He almost made me cry on that damn stage, too. I hugged him back, took the diploma, and headed back to my seat. I looked back to the bleachers, and she was gone. I shook my head a few times, feeling as if I were crazy. Had I imagined her being there? Was it all in my head?
I looked down at the diploma and opened it to see the certificate inside. Instead, I found an envelope. A letter with the words “My world” written across the front of it.
Mom’s letter.
Without thought, I opened it. Everything around me slowed down. Everyone went mute as my eyes darted across the words written in ink with nothing less than love.
My world,
Today’s a special day.
Your graduation day.
This is probably one of the hardest letters I’ve ever had to write. I have tears falling down my cheeks as I listen to you and your father watch sports in the living room. There’s a pot of tea on the stovetop, and I’m waiting for the whistling sound to alert us all. You will rush over to said teapot, pour me a cup, and ask if I’d like sugar or honey in it.
Always both.
You know this, but you always ask.
I want to thank you for taking care of me these last few months. I know it hasn’t been easy on you, Son, but you’ve been the most heroic individual throughout all of this. Thank you for loving your mama when she was too weak to love herself. The greatest part of my life has been, and will always be, you.
If you’re reading this letter, that means I’m gone from the physical realm, but I want you to know that I’m right beside you through every step you take.
Especially on today. The day you’re walking across that stage, accepting your diploma to start the next chapter of your life.
I want you to know that I understand if the past year was hard for you. I want you to know, no matter what, I’m proud of you. You’ve could’ve messed up a million times. You’ve could’ve failed over and over again. You could’ve done drugs, and drank, and fallen apart repeatedly, yet I’m so proud of you, Milo, because you still made it here. To this day.
I do not know what your next steps are. I simply know you’re going to be okay, because I know you, Son. I know your heart and how it beats. I know the good in your soul and the kindness of your spirit. You’re going to be okay. You’re going to be more than that. You will be great.
