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I hadn’t been back to our dorm room very much, and I needed best friend time. Whitney didn’t scold me for not being around as much. She simply seemed happy to see me. It amazed me how far one person’s jaw could drop after I filled her in on everything going on in my life.
“Well, you’re definitely not Cheerios anymore,” Whitney breathed out. “What are you going to do?”
I shook my head. “I don’t know. The counselor says a lot of people change their majors along the way. And with my communications degree, I could find a job in a different field. On top of that, I have my two minors.”
“I guess you being an overachiever paid off,” she joked. Then a frown found her. “You really are considering giving up your teaching career for this guy?”
“It’s not just about Milo,” I confessed as I picked at my fingernails. “I think it has less and less to do with him and more to do with me. I went into this wanting to be a teacher simply because I wanted to make my mom proud. And sure, maybe I do end up still wanting to teach, but where my head is right now, I don’t know if I can make the right choices. I don’t know my likes or dislikes. All I know is that I’m good at learning things. I’m a great student, but that doesn’t mean that it makes me happy. For the first time in my life, I want to be happy, Whit.”
“I want that for you, too, Star. It’s funny, though. I thought I’d be the one going through a college life crisis way before you.”
I snickered. “I’m just full of surprises this year.”
“The things we do for love…” she somewhat joked.
“You think I’m crazy.”
“Yes,” she quickly stated. She reached across to me and held my hand. “But I also think all the best women in the world had to be a little crazy to get what they wanted. You’re brave, too, Star. And besides, even if this all blows up in your face and your life spirals downward, you’ll have a good story to tell in the nursing home one day.”
I began fidgeting with my hands as I sat back in my chair. “Whit, do you think you could name fifteen things that you love to do?”
“Fifteen?” she asked, then she waved a dismissal hand my way. “I could easily name thirty.”
She’d named forty-two by the time lunch was over.
CHAPTER 34
Milo
Starlet and I began spending almost all our time together. We showered together, cooked together, and watched movies together. We’d been listening to the same audiobooks for fun before bed. It was as if our worlds were emerging the way we’d hoped. But something felt off. She felt off, which left me unsettled.
One night after I finished my homework, we took a shower together and tossed on some sweats to be comfortable.
“You need to eat something. I can cook for you or order something in,” Starlet said, going through the fridge as I sat on the barstool in front of the island, staring her way. She was wearing my oversized sweats, and all I could think about was how much I loved her.
“I’m not too hungry.”
“You still have to eat. It’s important to eat. I’ll grab my phone and—”
“Hey.”
She turned to me, and her shoulders dropped. “Hey.”
“Come here.” She walked over to me and stepped between my legs. I wrapped my arms around her. “Are you good?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. Everything’s okay. I want to make sure—”
“Star.”
Her eyes were glassed over. She shook her head. “I’m just mentally working through some things.”
“You want to work through them out loud with me?”
“No. It’s fine. I don’t want to add more pressure to your life.”
I arched my eyebrow. “Now you’re worrying me. What’s wrong?”
Her eyes flashed with emotions, but she blinked them away. That was the opposite of who I’d known her to be from the beginning of time. Starlet never hid her emotions. That was one of the many things I loved about her.
“Star,” I whispered, brushing my mouth against hers. “Talk to me.”
“I will. Soon. Just not tonight, if that’s okay? I just need to process things first.”
“Did I do something wrong?”
Her eyes widened, and she shook her head. “No. Of course not. Honestly, you’re the only thing that really makes sense in my world right now.”
“Well, when you’re ready to talk, I’m ready to listen.” I kissed her cheeks. “But in the meantime, just know that everything’s gonna work out fine.”
She pointed a stern finger at me. “How dare you use those words against me?”
“Sorry, Teach. You should’ve never taught me those words.”
Her head dropped a little. “You probably don’t have to call me Teach anymore. That’s not something I see coming to fruition in the foreseeable future.”
