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“Oh,” was all I could say. “Well.”
“Ah, right, there’s something else I want to do with you,” he added, licking his lips. “How about we scream our hearts out?”
“What do you—” Without a warning, Gray enthusiastically dragged me back toward the edge of the cliff with the smile of a child on his face. We stood side by side and took a deep breath as we watched the waterfall moving before us, the trees dancing below us, and the clouds turning pearly white above us.
Gray let go of my hand. “I used to always come here whenever I was sad, happy, or angry,” he started as my gaze followed his voice. “I would scream and curse at people, listen to my own echoes, and other times even sleep here.”
“And now?”
“Hmm, the last time was a few days ago, but that was also the first time in nine years.”
“Do you still like it?”
He looked hesitant at first, but continued, “Of course. Do you want to try it?”
I shook my head, holding back a giggle. “I’m already screaming internally.”
“Oh-ho! That’s not good. You have to let it out. You wanted to smash Cole’s non-existent car earlier. Isn’t there any little rage left inside of you that you would like to release?” he encouraged.
I chuckled and focused my gaze over the rainbow with a smile so pensive—it probably killed the leaves on the trees.
“Yeah, there is. The feelings of betrayal and hurt,” I admitted. “But I’m madder at myself for not noticing it earlier. Having someone else besides my mom was such a comfort that I refused to see the truth. Cole and I didn’t drift apart, he was just never mine to begin with.”
“I’m … sorry about that.”
“Don’t be. It will only make me feel bad, and I am freaking tired of crying like a fool,” I said. “Can I tell you a secret instead?”
Gray gestured for me to continue. “I’m all ears, small bean.”
“I kissed him first,” I confessed. “When we were thirteen. I told him to kiss me, but he said he didn’t know how. Then, I remembered watching this movie, with my mom, of a couple kissing. She called it a French kiss … I told Cole that I was going to teach him how to do it and threatened him that I would make up a rumor about him wearing SpongeBob briefs if he dared reject me. Cole was like ‘okay.’ He was so calm too.” I laughed. “It was crazy and stupid. And now that I think about it, Cole must have dated me because he felt bad that I had to go through all those ridiculous lengths to try and win his heart. Unless maybe I scared him.”
Gray laughed. “It’s probably the latter.”
“I know, right?”
“So …” He settled his gaze back to me. “Do you regret it?”
“Of course! I regret thinking he’d fallen for me.” I paused briefly. “It’s okay, though. They say it always gets worse before it gets better. I’m just glad to be here.” I smiled warmly. “So, Gray Yoo, if you want to scream, go ahead. I’ll support you. After all, it’s all thanks to you that I’m here.”
“No.” He sounded distant, like he wasn’t sure of it himself. “I feel better now.”
“Aish, you’re making me feel bad.”
“Huh?”
“Are you feeling shy right now?”
“No!” He averted his gaze and crossed his arms with such force, his tanned skin turning into the color of a rooster’s comb. “I’m not.”
“Really?” I scrutinized. “Lies.”
He uncrossed his arms, still not meeting my eyes. “I kid you not.”
It wasn’t very convincing.
“Fine, I’ll do it first, and then it’s your turn.” He didn’t answer, but I did it anyway.
I faced the waterfall and screamed at the top of my lungs, “Fuck you, Cole! You idiot! I know I’m blind, and you know it too! That’s why, you should’ve just told me the truth earlier! Do you have any idea how much of Eomma’s money I had to spend on you and your poop face? I fucking have no idea either, you dimwit!”
