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I stumbled over roots and pushed through leafy ferns, hating the way my voice shook as I called for him again.
“Gray?” Matching my feet to my heart beat, I trampled through the forest, dread growing black and oily in the pit of my stomach until, finally, the fog dispersed enough for me to see him.
I spotted Gray at the edge of a cliff, his feet fixed on the ground with his body facing the waterfall, as if reenacting what had happened in my visions.
It scared me more than it should have. The lump in my throat kept me from screaming or calling out for him, so I ran as fast I could. With each step, memories of our childhood skipped through my brain.
Gray, smiling up at me as he dared me to jump from the swings.
Gray, shoving Cole to the side in order to stand next to me at our first-grade choir concert.
Gray, snickering as he hid the last cookie from his aunt Suzy and sneaking it to me under the table while we worked on homework.
Gray, walking right past the other girls at school, but stopping to tease me.
Then this morning, the parts I should have noticed through his bravado … Gray, anxiously playing with the hem of his shirt while sitting on his obnoxious orange bike, hoping to convince me to accompany him.
Ignoring the burning in my lungs, I ran faster, praying to any god who might be listening that I wouldn’t be too late.
As soon as I reached Gray, I enveloped his body firmly, refusing to let go.
My voice muffled against his shirt as I spoke, “Didn’t I tell you? Don’t even think about it. You’re supposed to stay close to me. You’re supposed to stay away from the cliff, you dumbass.”
“Aera,” he said. “Are you okay?”
“AmIokay?” I bawled, unable to hold back the tears. I didn’t want to show any more holes in my emotional armor, especially not in front of Gray. To my dismay, the entire situation was beyond unbearable. I had no idea why, but the thought of my constant agitator dying sounded more painful than the thought of Cole realizing he didn’t love me after all. And it took Gray being inches away from death to make me realize this.
“How dare you scare me like that? If you jump off the cliff, how am I going to save you? You know I can’t swim!” I yelled.
Gray would know. I could never get myself to dive or step into any large hole filled with water ever sincetheswimming pool incident—one he’d caused. Unless I was in a dream where I could do just about anything.
“Are you crying?” He touched the arms that held on to him with fear. “Aera, let go.”
“No!” I tightened my grip around his waist. Eyes shut. Heart pounding. “You’re gonna let yourself fall.”
“I won’t,” he said softly, his tone so convincing it somehow relaxed my nerves. “I’m not going to fall, but we might if you keep on holding on to me like this.”
I sniveled like a child. “You’re not?”
“No, I won’t.” He slowly unfastened my grip, stepped us away from the edge, and turned around to face me. “See? It’s all good.” His hands latched on to my shoulders as if to steady me.
“You’re not going to jump anymore?”
Gray’s gaze never left mine.
The gust of wind blew across his smooth hair, allowing me to get a closer look at his dark and hollow eyes. There was a faint void I never noticed before.
He wiped my tears with his fingers and stated as he poked on my nose playfully, “Who said I was going to jump? Not in this lifetime, small bean. I can’t even swim, so why would I jump?” He beamed at me all of a sudden.
I covered my face with both hands, fighting the heat on my cheeks. “Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t cry because of you. It was the dust. It got into my eyes,” I lied.
“I know,” he said as he gently moved my arms down.
I tilted my head back to look him in the eyes. “You do?”
He nodded, his eyes soft and sad for a moment before he cocked his head and said in a theatrical voice, “The great Aera Song would never cry over little ole me.”
Surprise, surprise … I did.
