Page 15 of All Her Feelings


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Vali nodded. “It’s hard to write down a magic that is all about feelings. That’s okay, though. We can start from the beginning.”

“Please,” Holly said, barely able to keep the excitement out of her voice. She was finally going to have a chance to learn about her magic from a real Empath. Even if the pain never went away, if she could learn more about it, she could be more effective to Claire and the others as they rebuilt the Realm.

Vali smiled at her and sipped her tea. “Where to begin… Empath magic was first recorded in the history of the Realm over a thousand years ago, before the Alliance. Powerful leaders sought Empaths to help control their territories. Some sought the Empaths by showering them with gifts, and others used more brutal methods. A strong Empath can control crowds of up to a thousand people, and their range can be up to a mile for more targeted influencing.”

A thousand people? Up to a mile? Those numbers made Holly’s head spin. She was lucky to manage a crowd of less than a hundred people, like last night, and that hadn’t been close to all the shifters. Only the shifter leaders and upper families had sent representatives.

“You’ll get there, young Empath,” Vali said, reading her mind, or likely, her spinning emotions.

“Now, as I was saying, Empaths were highly sought out for their skills. After the Alliance, the need for their services became less, and Empaths started fading into the background. Some accounts say that was intentional, as they were tired of being used, but other Empaths faithfully served their leaders for decades.”

“They were servants?” Synora frowned, shooting Holly a concerned look.

“I can see how you would think that,” Vali said. “And some under the more unsavory leaders were treated like servants. But others, under good leaders? They had high positions at the leader’s side and were treated as important members of their family. Empaths have served many roles across history.”

“Why are there so few now?” Holly asked.

“I’m not going to lie and say being an Empath isn’t dangerous. You’ve likely already figured that out,” Vali said, looking at Holly. “About fifty years before the Great War, a few Empaths started to disappear in mysterious circumstances. Not all of them, but there weren’t that many of us to begin with—only five I’ve known in my lifetime. Three of them disappeared in the fifty years leading up to the Great War. The fourth died during the Great War. I’m the last of the ones that I know of. There might be others, but like I said, we faded into the background after the Alliance. You and I are the only ones I know of that are left. It’s a guarded secret, which I thought is why you didn’t announce it when you came with Claire. Had I known you didn’t know about our heritage, I would have talked to you sooner.”

“What do you think happened to them? Were they… killed?”

“I don’t know for sure,” Vali said, cupping her mug in her hand and looking out the window as memories danced across her face. “I hope not. I would like to think they got tired of being requested to serve different roles and disappeared to live their lives, but I also won’t discount the possibility they were hunted down to be taken out of the game.”

Vali didn’t sugarcoat it, but Holly appreciated that, even as Synora stiffened next to her. “I told Prince Erick my concerns,” Vali continued, “and he doubled security around me during the war. He tried to find out what had happened to the others, but he came up empty.”

Holly sat back in her chair as she processed it all.Wow.She felt better about keeping her Empath magic hidden. Something had always whispered to her to keep it quiet, but after discovering how much pain it could bring, it was an easy decision. She wondered if it was painful to the other Empaths. Vali had said it wasn’t supposed to be, but still. There must have been a reason they disappeared.

“Now, I know you are on a tight schedule, but despite what your mates may think, I am not prepared for everything all the time. It’s going to take me a bit to draw up some formal lessons and training. It’s been so long for me that I want to make sure I can go back to the beginning and not miss anything that might be important for you to know. Take the rest of the afternoon and evening to spend time with your mates and friends, and come back tomorrow morning. I’ll pull my books from the archives and prepare some lessons for you.”

Although Holly was disappointed she wasn’t going to be able to learn more tonight, she was grateful Vali was willing to teach her, so she nodded. “If that wouldn’t be too much trouble, that would be amazing.”

“No trouble at all, young Empath. It’ll be your turn to teach someone else one day, I’m sure,” Vali said as she rose. Holly felt the weight of her words settle on her shoulders, but she kept her smile light as she and Synora rose from the table and thanked Vali for the tea and information.

* * *

Holly walkedout of Vali’s cottage in a daze. “Come on,” Synora murmured, capturing her hand and gently leading her back toward the village.

She obediently followed Synora, her head spinning. Walking through the village didn’t help at all. Although the Fae kept emotionless masks, they felt their emotions deeply and projected them loudly. How did Vali stand it?

Synora noticed her wincing and wrapped an arm around her shoulder, bringing her closer. “What is it?”

“Sorry, everything’s just so… much,” Holly said lamely, unable to describe what was going on inside her head. In the past, when her head felt this noisy and the pressure built up too much, she would seek out a partner for some sexual release. While not a fix, the release would calm her mind a little. But now, she had her mates, and as much as she wanted that release, she didn’t want to use them like that. Because that’s all she was doing, in the past—using her partners. Her mates were different. Not only in that they were stuck together, tied by fate, but also that they weren’t strangers she could use once and leave. They were still strangers in a way, not really having had time yet to get to know each other, but still.Ugh.Relationships were all so complicated; that’s why Holly usually avoided them. And now she had three with three very different people. How did she juggle it all without failing one of them? How did Claire juggle it all? She could start with the mate she was with.

“Tell me about your childhood,” she asked Synora. “Was it like this?” She gestured to the Fae children playing along the path.

Synora smiled fondly at the children. “A bit. A lot more trees, though. We were always tumbling over roots and swinging from the vines. Gave our mom a heart attack a time or two. We would come home with cuts and scrapes, but she would always patch us up. She tried scolding us, but one of our fathers would always take her in his arms and tell her that’s how we learned.”

Holly smiled, picturing a small Synora hanging from a branch. “That sounds lovely.”

“What about you? Were you giving your parents scares as well?”

Holly let out a rueful laugh and shook her head. “No. I didn’t really play outside. I was more of an inside child, playing dress-up and dolls.” Her parents would have never allowed her to tumble about in the dirt like the Fae children they were passing. That would have given them a heart attack—if she showed up with dirt on her. She had a good childhood, though. Desmond had always included her in their games once he met his Triad, and when they left for the Academy, he convinced her papa she should come with.

“There’s nothing wrong with that,” Synora said, giving her a smile that had Holly’s heart beating a bit faster.

“Tell me more about growing up in the Elven Forest,” Holly said. “Was it strange to never leave it, or did you have a chance to during the Great War?”

“I wasn’t born until well into when the war started,” Synora said. “It was… normal not leaving the Forest. Obviously, we knew there was a world beyond it, but we also knew of the danger. When Winona died and sealed off the Forest, the Elders decided it wasn’t worth the risk to attempt to access the outside world. We had to do some shifts in our resources—we had lost access to the outside world, after all—but we managed. It was a good life, but something was always missing for me.”

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