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“Go. I’ll tell Dad. Just yell if you need anything,” Trent told us. I sent him a grateful smile, then curled back into Dec as he turned down the hallway.
Declan walked into my room, then kicked the door shut behind us. I looked around, happy to see my space was just as I had left it. The soft, silky white sheets of my bed looked so inviting and I was comforted by all of the familiar little touches I had added to my room, some I picked myself, some Trent gifted me.
The top of the bookshelf Trent had bought for me, to store the many books I had accumulated in the short time I had been there, was now filled with framed photos of the people I cared for, of me and Dad, of my guys and of Trent and Nan. On my dressing table now sat little boxes and baskets, filled with organised cosmetics, make-up, and the many perfumes Trent had ordered for me, saying I needed a selection so I would know which was my favourite. I still didn’t have a favourite though, since all of the expensive scents smelled wonderful to me.
On my bed, amongst the many cushions of assorted shapes and shades of pink, sat Bonkers, the stuffed elephant Trent had sent for me just after I met Dad.
Home. It was home and I felt safe there, especially with Declan at my side.
“Let’s take a nap, okay? You look exhausted,” he said as he set me in the middle of my bed and then started pulling all of the cushions out from behind me and tossing them to the floor.
“Not that I’m c-complaining, but didn’t you have a meeting at the gym this m-morning?” I asked as I sat up and moved aside some of the cushions to help. I handed the elephant to Declan and was grateful when he took the time to place it on the top of my chest of drawers, rather than dropping it to the floor with the throw cushions. They all knew how much that stuffed animal meant to me. It had been one of my first real signs of hope in the darkness, and that was why I coveted it so. It, along with Trent’s kind words in the card he sent, had been a huge turning point in my life. I would always treasure that moment and the reminder of it, that Bonkers was.
“I wrapped it up early. I wanted to be here when you got home,” he told me as he moved the last two heart shaped cushions, then perched on the end of the bed and started pulling off my trainers for me.
“Thank you,” I told him. “I’m really glad you’re h-here.”
“Me too, beautiful.”
He dropped my trainers to the floor, then toed off his own, before turning and looking over me where I sat in the middle of my huge bed.
“Do you need anything? Any meds or some water?” he asked.
“No.” I shook my head. “Nothing b-but you. Come and hold me, Dec, please.”
He nodded once, in that stoic way he did, then he was laid on the bed beside me, pulling me down into his arms and pressing me into his front, tightly, but not tight enough to hurt my bruised ribs. I happily curled around him, throwing my right leg over both of his and wrapping my arms around him as much as I could. For several moments we just lay there in a wonderfully comfortable silence. Declan ran his hand up and down my back gently, taking away the last of my anxiety and calming me completely.
“I know I shouldn’t say this. It’s too soon, but I almost lost you. I can’t…if I lost you…I just…I need you to hear this. I…I love you Blake. I love you so fucking much. You don’t have to say anything back, but I need you to know…to understand just how much you mean to me,” he said all at once, the words just pouring from him and catching me completely off guard. “I know it’s fast. You don’t know me that well, but I…fuck, I know this is corny…but you were meant for me. I feel it, deep inside. You’re mine…ours…all of ours, and I love you.”
I crushed my face hard against his chest and took a deep breath in as I thought through everything that had just poured from him. I agreed, it was fast. We’d known each other for less than two months, but in that time our encounters had been intense – not just with Declan, but with all four of them. They’d been there through my anxiety attacks and nightmares. They’d held me together the night of Dad and Trent’s accident and through the days that followed, and then, after that car hit me, they’d been there every single day. They’d been at my side even when I lay unconscious, then, for the last week they had been with me every single moment that I needed them.
Before that car hit me and everything that followed, I wouldn’t have been ready to hear any of them tell me that they loved me. I hadn’t been there yet, but having them with me at the hospital, feeling the way they could comfort me and make me feel safe, even when I was at my most terrified and vulnerable, it had changed things. It had taken away any lingering fears and doubts I had been harbouring about the four of them.
“I love you too, Declan,” I returned as I lifted my head and met his blue-grey gaze watching me. “It’s not too s-soon. I feel it….what you said…deep inside. It feels so right when I’m with the four of you. I love you.”
“You do?” he asked as he looked deep into my eyes, for what I was unsure, but I wasn’t worried. I meant every word I had said and he would see no fear in my eyes – not when it came to him and the others. I wasn’t sure about much in my life, but I was sure about the four of them. Sure that I both needed and wanted them, and sure I would do everything I could within my power to fight for us.
“I do,” I replied as a smile spread over my face. I pressed my weight up onto my hands until my lips reached his and we shared a short kiss. I was disappointed when he pulled back after just a few moments, but I realised why when I saw how much my arms, which were holding me up, shook. Of course he had noticed.
“You need to rest,” he told me as he put his hands under my arms and lifted my weight, placing me down on top of his hard body.
“I can’t sleep here,” I laughed, even as I snuggled up on top of him, sliding my legs down between his and wrapping my arms wide around his sides. He smelled so good and his firm, warm body was the world’s most satisfying mattress.
“You can. I’m not going anywhere and I like having you on top of me like this. Maybe I can sleep too, knowing you’re here and safe,” he mused as he wrapped his arms around me.
“Okay,” I gave in, already feeling my eyes becoming heavy as I lay my head on his chest and snuggled in even more against him. “But just shove me off if I g-get heavy.”
“Stop fussing and close your eyes now,” he told me with a note of sternness in his voice, that I found strangely appealing. I wanted to come back with some witty retort, but I was already half asleep and before I could consider it anymore, I was out.
CHAPTER 4
BLAKE
When I woke up Declan was already awake, just looking down at me, where I still lay exactly where I’d been when I fell asleep, curled up on top of him. I had slept soundly, no nightmares or memories finding their way to me, and I was pretty sure that was because there was no way I could feel anything but safe and protected when I lay on top of my protective giant, as I had been.
“Hey, beautiful. Did you sleep okay?” he asked in that husky voice that did strange things to me.
“I did. You kept m-my nightmares away.”
