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“Right. You, Killion. Mostly to protect you, not just your world.” She went on. “Everything was real. Every single moment between us was sincere and deep and… real. So real I had to make that tough decision.”
“So you left,” Killion said. “I know. I was there.”
“I loved you. That’s why I left. Because I loved you so much it hurt, Killion.” Tears began to trickle down her cheek. “I’d already lost so much at the hands of those monsters. I couldn’t afford to lose you too.”
“But you did lose me. When you left.”
“A chance I had to take. I needed to know you were safe and unharmed through all of this. Even if I couldn’t guarantee my own safety, I could protect you.” She went on. “If I… if I lost you because of Lindstrom or, in this case, those guys Bartell and Langley, I couldn’t go on. I couldn’t live with myself if I brought the demons of my past to your front steps. At least leaving so you could remain safe meant I had somewhere to come home to –– someone to come home to.”
“Okay.” Killion nodded. “I understand. We don’t have to talk about it. What’s done is done.”
“No, we do have to talk about it, Killion. I know this is hard for you, and it makes you uncomfortable, but I can’t stand the thought that you’re hurting and I’m the cause. I want you to know everything. I want you to know all the things I couldn’t say to you before. Please know that I am being one hundred percent transparent and honest when I tell you that I didn’t know I was pregnant when I left.”
“And if you did?” he was quick to question. “Would you have still left?”
“I… I don’t know.” She shrugged. “But I can tell you that finding out I was carrying your child brought me so much joy and… hope. It gave me the strength and courage to fight for the life I wanted and find my way back to you, even if I couldn’t have you the way I wanted to anymore. We had a new connection, even if you had no idea, which kept me going. I also knew the decision to leave was right because if anything happened to me, the twins would have you and all the O’Reillys. If I couldn’t, they’d have an entire family to care for them.”
“I could have protected you.”
“I know. But I didn’t want to take any risks.”
“Rainy, you had to know that the threats against you were no match for us. They couldn’t hurt us or impair us if we knew what was happening. We’d have taken the hit head-on and dealt with them.”
“Right. I would have had to tell you… everything.”
“We already had a case file on the guy and his operations. You wouldn’t have had to…”
“Killion.” She reached for his hands. “Everything about me. Everything I lived through. Everything that… happened to me.”
He stilled, knowing she was sharing something personal and likely unbearable, but unsure how to respond. Unsure where the boundaries were and if there were any. Surely, given the nature of the abuse she’d endured, there were plenty of boundaries –– boundaries he wished he’d known sooner. When they were together before, so he could be careful with her.
“I couldn’t risk you getting hurt like I was hurt…” She dropped her head a moment. “Or go through the hurt I went through all over again.”
“It wouldn’t have come to that,” he deadpanned. “I wouldn’t have let it.”
“I know that now. They say hindsight is twenty-twenty, after all. But at the time, all I knew was the fear.” She looked away as if she couldn’t face the memory, then straightened and turned back to Killion, taking her power back. “When I found out I was pregnant, I knew I’d made the right choice by leaving. I wasn’t just protecting you at that point, I was protecting the babies. It would have been reckless to take on Lindstrom and Bartell while pregnant. Those babies would have been even more leverage for the evildoers. As it is, I had them early, and they had to fight for their lives.”
“But had you stayed, it would have never come to that,” Killion defended. “I wouldn’t have let it.”
“You cannot know what would or could have happened, just like I didn’t. I made the best decision I could now, and we have to live with that.” She shrugged. “I went back to Safe Haven, and Brody helped me stay hidden while he tried to pull together the pieces needed to get everyone on the same target.”
Safe Haven is a refuge for victims of the worst kind of criminals who walked the earth: human trafficking, domestic abuse, and the like. The organization was made up of helpers from all walks of life. Motel owners who sheltered victims, truck drivers who helped move them quickly to safety, and even enforcers and assassins who put down the worst of the abusers.
A volunteer-based network, Safe Haven is mostly comprised of people impacted by domestic abuse or trafficking who want to help rescue victims. Anyone who was touched by such heinous crimes. From truck drivers to motel owners, farmers, big city giants, and everyone in between… it took all kinds to run this program. Completely off the books, it was free to those who needed help out of dire situations.
It took one case that overlapped with the Keepers for BK Security to see a need they could fill and step in to offer the resources needed to make Safe Haven more widespread and effective. That was how Wit and Coy came to be Keepers. It was also how Rainy escaped the grips of one of the most notorious crime bosses in the country and the trafficking ring he ran.
“Brody.” Killion sneered under his breath.
Rainy cradled his face. “Don’t be mad at him. He kept all of us safe. If I had stayed here, I would have been a distraction and added to the risk.”
Killion paused, considering his response, deciding to leave well enough alone because, truth be told, he didn’t know if he was mad at her. He didn’t know if it was truly justified or why he even felt the way he did. There were too many loose ends in his mind that somehow involved his heart, and it was all too much to reconcile in the moment. Rainy wanted to talk, so he would let her.
“I appreciate what Brody did and am even more glad that he could come back to the family after so many years. We didn’t think he was still alive.” Killion went on.
“A sacrifice he made to keep you all safe too,” she reminded.
“Yeah. I’m not mad at Brody,” Killion said.
