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Wit kicked his feet up on the edge of the concrete firepit. “You got me there. So tell me, why are you up here alone? You looked pretty lost in thought.”
“I was.” Killion didn’t elaborate beyond the simple confirming statement.
“Penny for your thoughts?”
Killion slapped his knee. “See, there you go again. What the hell does that even mean? You really want to give me money to tell you what I’m thinking? It’s going to cost a lot more than a penny.”
“Okay, let me translate for ya…” Wit amused. “Tell me what’s going on with you. I see you strugglin’, and I want to help. I know none of this is easy, especially for you.”
“What do you mean especially for me? Because I do things different? Think different?”
Not playing into the impending pity party, Wit simply agreed. “Exactly. You like nice clean lines, black and white, direct to the point. You thrive on routine and familiarity. None of what has happened these last couple of months fits in any of those boxes, so I know you’re struggling.”
“She’s different,” Killion said matter of factly.
“Rainy?”
Killion nodded.
“Of course, she is. She just experienced a traumatic incident, had a traumatic birth, a new mom to twins, nearly lost her life, and she’s fought back to some kind of normal all while remaining in the crosshairs of evil.” Wit stated. “That’s sure to make anyone a little different.”
“I don’t mean that. I understand the events of the past months are complicated –– mostly for her,” Killion confirmed. “I mean different from before. I knew her for months as Jenny. Had a very full relationship with her.”
“That was pretty clear given the fact you knocked her up, big guy.”
Killion gave Wit a side-eye glare. “You know what I mean. Who’s being literal now?”
“Oh. You got jokes. Okay, new Killion is funny.”
“Hardly,” Killion countered. “The girl I knew then was so different from the girl living in my apartment. Everything aside, she should still be the same person, right? I mean at her core. I got to know her as Jenny, so why does knowing her truth as Rainy feel so different? I feel like I can’t get it right with her.”
“Have you tried to get it right with her?”
Killion shook his head. “I don’t know how. It was so easy before. Everything just worked and made sense. Now, I don’t know how to approach her, what to say…”
“Why do you suppose that is?” Wit asked.
“Who’s a dense brick wall now?” Killion teased. “You know what I mean.”
“I think I do, but not sure what changed. We all knew of her as Jenny. Hell, I didn’t know she was my damn sister back then. I hadn’t seen my sister in a couple of decades at least but you’d think she’d have struck me as familiar.”
“You weren’t around her much,” Killion defended. “It was usually just her and me, which makes a hell of a lot of sense now.”
“See? I think you understand more than you realize.” Wit challenged. “Maybe that’s a big part of it. Just like I didn’t know my own sister, you didn’t know she was hiding a big piece of her life. We give you shit for being the smartest guy in the world. You think maybe that’s what bothers you? The smartest guy in the room didn’t know the girl he loved was hiding an entire life?”
Killion quickly met Wit’s stare when he referenced love. “I don’t know if it was that serious yet.”
“Brother, you know exactly what it was. That girl left, and you moped around here for months. She broke your heart only to return in the worst possible scenario, clearly pregnant with your children, facing imminent doom.” Wit went on. “In a matter of seconds, she whisked back into your life, had a couple of kids in her belly, that you put there, and laid at death’s door before you had a minute to process it all.”
Killion scratched his head and rested his head on the back of the oversized chair he was sitting in. He sat silent while thinking over what Wit said, and though it should have made things more clear, it seemed to complicate them more.
“When I saw her, I…” Killion couldn’t fill in the blank. He was at a loss for words because digging deep into his feelings was complicated, sharing them was near impossible.
“I know, buddy. It was like as much a relief as it was earth shattering. She was back, but with a lot of baggage and I don’t mean my little niece and nephew. You knew who she really was. Suddenly, you knew where she’d gone, why, and that she’d hidden such a big part of herself from you.”
Killion snapped his fingers and pointed at Wit. “That. That right there. No matter how mad I wanted to be at her for leaving without a word and keeping the babies from me, I couldn’t. I was so relieved to see her. The rest didn’t seem to matter. But as time went on, it did.”
“How so?”
