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“Well, I’m sorry about the book but grateful for the ride.”
Her pretty, shy smile was like a magnet pulling me in, but thankfully, before I could do something stupid, like ruin our friendship by kissing her, Vanessa’s stomach let out the loudest bear growl I’d ever heard from a woman.
“Well that wasn’t embarrassing. At all.”
She laughed and shook her head, covering her face with one hand, and I couldn’t help but laugh.
It was just the opening I was looking for. “How about a late night breakfast? I could always go for waffles.”
Her grateful smile sent a wave of heat through me. “That would be great, actually. Thanks.”
A few minutes later we were seated at an all-night diner that specialized in gourmet pancakes. “So Vanessa, are you a pancake girl or steak and eggs?”
She threw her head back and laughed. “Would you be grossed out if I said both?”
I shook my head with a smile. “Totally.”
“Steak, eggs and pancakes are literally the perfect breakfast. And if I’m feeling especially hungry, a side of hash brown potatoes too.”
She didn’t look embarrassed at all and I found that incredibly hot.
“No offense, but where in the hell do you put all that food?”
She shrugged. “Yoga and kickboxing, mostly.”
“Kickboxing, huh? That’s pretty impressive.”
“Yeah? You want to give me some tips, coach?” Her tone was flirtatious, but I was out of practice. Maybe she was just a nice girl.
“I would need to see your form, but sure, I could give you some pointers. Why kickboxing?”
“You mean instead of aerobics or Pilates?” Her words were playful but still, I treaded carefully.
“No, just curious. What attracted you to kickboxing.”
“Oh. Well, I did it once, and I like feeling strong and capable. Plus, it’s a really exhilarating workout.”
A young pimple-faced waiter stopped at the table and couldn’t take his eyes off Vanessa, who was completely oblivious to the effect she had on men of all ages.
We ordered enough food to feed a small nation, and I realized this non-date was the best date I’d had in a long time.
“So, was there a reason you needed to feel strong and capable?”
“Not really, no. I just didn’t realize how much feeling like that would appeal to me. Does that sound horrible?”
“Not at all. I work around plenty of strong women, physically at the House of Ashby and mentally, well Sadie, Kat, and Maisie. Strength makes you feel confident and when you feel confident, it’s extremely attractive.”
She laughed. “So you’re saying you think Sadie is hot?” She laughed even louder this time, drawing smiles from a group of old timers who were either out really late or up really early.
I shrugged. “She’s a beautiful woman. Sadie is the mother I never had but always wanted. Sort of.” It was complicated and not where I wanted the conversation to go at the moment.
“That’s kind of sweet. What happened to your mother if that’s not totally intrusive?”
Well, shit. “Mostly drugs and alcohol, but she’s still around if that’s what you’re asking.”
“That sucks, I’m sorry Emmett. I’ve actually found more comfort in the family I chose than the one I was born with, so I’d say you lucked out pretty good to join a family that’s so close.”
“I guess that’s the way I should be looking at it, huh?” I sounded like a whiny prick and that was no way to get a woman interested. Not that she was interested, especially after the way she bolted from the car earlier. “Oh hey, I wanted to apologize about earlier. I didn’t mean to offend you.”
“What? Oh!” She waved off the apology just as platter upon platter of food arrived at the table. “We’re not stoners,” she laughed to the waiter. “I swear.”
“Uh, sure,” he said, obviously not believing her.
Vanessa giggled like a little girl once the waiter disappeared. “Did it sound like I was protesting too much?”
“Only a little,” I told her and held both hands out about two feet apart.
“Damn. Oh well.” She bit into a strip of bacon and moaned so deep I had to look away and squirm in the booth seat. “So good. Anyway you didn’t offend me.”
Conversation with Vanessa was unpredictable and it kept me on my toes. And completely off-kilter. “I didn’t? Because you bolted from the car pretty fast. Like I offended you.”
She flashed a sweet, slightly embarrassed smile. “Your words sent my mind racing in a few different directions and those thoughts made me feel…guilty. Disloyal.” She sighed as if struggling to figure out what she wanted to say so I sat back and ate, letting her gather her thoughts.
“Grief is a tricky thing, and sometimes it makes me crazy. On the one hand, I want to move on and live life because that’s what I should do. On the other hand, the guilt for wanting to move on with my life is unbearable.”
